Show HER MAIDEN FEARS george there was an anxiety lust a little 0 it in the girl s tone I 1 read in the paper that alarmed me what was lt niagara falls are wearing away at the rate of more than 12 inches a year and in the course of some hundreds of years will be gone entirely what of thata you know it is such a delightful place at which to spend a honeymoon yes 1 I bad set my heart on going there on our honeymoon Y e es we have been engaged tour years now about that length of time she laid her head on his shoulder and sobbed in that time boohoo boo hoo fully 60 inches of the falls have been worn hoo and am afraid they 11 all be gone before before oh dear what am I 1 saying never mind love said george ten derly as he lessed her cheeks don t cry well go before the falls are worn away how would next septem her suit that will do nicely sweetheart and she was happy again royal magazine NO satisfying SOME PEOPLE friend on top what a lucky thing that tree stump was there ikey ikey lucky oh lor look at mine beautiful new pants all torn to rags I 1 mistress and maid mrs house keeper what have you in this pot bridget 7 bridget who Is trying to clean the old by boiling them plaze mum th lamp tops they auz no use at all at all mrs SlIm det well don t forget to put in plenty of seasoning new york weekly in a proscenium box mrs de rich listening to new erlma donna at the opera she splendid mr de rich wealthy manufacturer enthusiastically just grandl ashes worthy of a place alongside of in my soap advertisements new york weekly A GIVE AWAY madlne yes all the girls on the beach said they knew you kissed me chho we were both diving under water sydney surprised gracious how did they know madlne why they saw tho bubbles come up to the surface A last resort mrs H my husband Is out of work and oat of money and I 1 am going to get a divorce from him mrs B and then how are you going to get along H on the alimony of course A positive defense wile this looks black against you hui band what aue the noto I 1 found in your r my typewriter husband black I 1 I 1 was sure I 1 ordered purple ink baltimore amerl can by cab measure and continued the teacher how many feet are there in B mile two thousand promptly an wlllie whose father was president of a taxicab company ufa THE BALD TRUTH barber do ou know ot anything that would be good for that bald spot on the crown ot my headd yes sir but it would be pretty ex e how much probably not less than 25 Is it a sure thing yes sir what do you call it A wig sir that was the time the barber dlan I 1 get any tip chicago tribune SAVING HIS conscience prospective buyer place entirely free from mosquitoes 9 hiram thoughtfully yes if you come around at the reghl tl no of year willing to walt miss de rich now my love you must ask pa nr de oh I 1 m in no hurry lets wait 1 I do not object to a long engage ment it it is your wish but how iong um er how old is your pa new york weekly hard braggs they bay the french are deteriorating graggs I 1 know it the last time I 1 was over in france I 1 make them understand their own lan guage life industrious mr handout did you help at th town fire last night tramp A little I 1 got out of the way of the alre engine chicago jour nal sure pa a well the angels live up in th sky don t they yes I 1 suppose so r star boarders aint they pa cleveland leader A nice time miss tiptop did ou enjoy yourself at the opera last evening miss hestend westend oh awfully mr blatherskite Is the most delightful I 1 ever attended i musical performance with new york weekly rooster the dog bill what do you call your dog jha I 1 call him rooster funny name tor a dog why roos ter because hes a setter dog hut ho never lays any eggs statesman MUST HAVE FACED A MIRROR funny it the persona these receptions attract ya as and such old looking freaks I 1 e seen quite a few at ua one |