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Show 4necdot 4neMota dnecdota Pre.sidentla Presidentla Presidentla- PresidentlaAlthough Pr . sidentia - ' . Although Althouah the White HOUJC House is I * . the the"at thetest thelast "at at test " placi plaee place in to the world ( except exceptGrant exceptGranVs exceptGrant Grant GranVs ' ' * . Tomb ) you'd youd ' ' expect te to find finda finda finda a gag , gagman ac 111811 than . , . some of 01 our Presldenta Presidents Presldentabave Presidentshave Presidenthave * bave have fashioned talhloned bon boss motto mottos * that thatwould thatwould thatwould would have bave earned them berth berths * . on onleadln onleading onleading leadln leading , radio comedian ? * . * ' payroll payrQ1l8 payrolls payrollsca1VIn * Calvin Ca1v1n ca1VIn CooUdge CooUllrlt Coolidge , . generally cenuaJy ) accept accept- accepted accepted accepted - I ICa1v1n of the Chief ChiefExecutive ChiefExecutives Chief-Executive Chief Executive ed . aa as . the tightest-lipped tightest lipped tightest-Upped Upped - - - Executive Executives - * . , . , baa haa has several nifties nlfUe nifUes . to hi his hiscredit hicredit * . credit . A Washington W.sh1nItOD Wsh1nItOD . ( correspondent correspondentquestioned correspondentquestioned q-.e.Uoned qe.Uoned q .e.Uoned eUoned questioned - . . himabout him about his hi * reaction reactionto reactionto reactioni to * Rupert flupert Hughes Buebes ' biography de- de debunking de-bunldng de bunldng - - - bunJdo bunking , many of the legend leaends legends * about aboutGeor aboutGeorge aboutGeorge Geor George , . TTaablngton Washington CooUdge Coolidge gazed gazedo.t gazedout gazedout o-.t o.t o .t t out - . the window and aQd ad then muttered mutterednasaUy mutteredsiasally mutterednasally nasaUy siasally ' "I I " notice noUce the th Washington WashingtonUonwn WashingtonMonument WashingtonUonument Uonwn Monument t I la is , still till standing standlnK standingIn " y yIn In a dlscussJonon discussion dlscussJon -on on - en on the proper use useof useof useaf of a word . , . Grover Cleveland was wascurprJJled wassurprised wassurprised curprJJled surprised to bear a Senator refer to tohi tohis tobis hi his , ' source 'oU1'ce oU1ce ' a as . Daniel Webster s I dic die dictIonu dieUonar3t dietlonary tIonu Uonar3t ' " ' * But my m1 dear Senator Senafor Sena- Sena Senator - - tor for , . , " . said .ald ald Cleveland , . . "Noah Noah "Noab Noab " madethe madethe made the dictionary " "Don Don " Don t be1117 besilly be - allly -1117 1117 silly . . . " ' replied r\plled r plled r \ ! plied the Senator giving givingaim , givingnim Ivlng IvlngDIm DIm aim a scornful ICOrntul look . . . "Noah Noah " built builtthe builtthe builtthe the ark . . ' " I jI | 'n n ' 1T OAN'T OANT OAN CAN'T CANT _ ' BE DE DONE * ' j - Wei When Wilsesi Willon Wilson was wa * raced feed faced . , witk with se- se severe severe - - vere opposition earsi ttlex ei un on his hi bI * . Leaf Leape League of ofNations ofNations fNatleas Nations Teawul proposals * , , tar the objection ebjectlei"It ebjectleiIt , . .It It ' " . ( It eaa't eaat eaD.t eaDt can't cant . ' ' be eleae done , . " waB was we . * familiar familiarto familiarte to his U hi * . ears . ear . * . At ncb such seen time times * be bewould bewoulti hewealJ would woulti relate this tkl * story tery * ' A man manwa manwas aaanwaa wa was . telltag telUnc telling his hi * Ion son a . bedUnr bedtime .to- .to ito- ito itoTI . ste-ry ste ry .toI'f - - I'f If TI ' aaeat abont about aD an alligater aWc.tor aWctor alligator . It was wasoree wascreeping wacreefttag * oree creeping 1D . np up f kehind beblnd behind a tairtle turtle with withits witaiit its . " * aeath mouth wide open ei Finally n Ily 1 it & itwas Itwaa wa was . witali wlthiD within reach reacb kit but just ! < as a * 1t Its Itsgreat Itgreat * . peat great jaw Saws jaws were lIDapplnc snapptng appteg abut shut tthe , . , the frtle turtle anade made a sprlDl spring rtag ' , raa ran up upa upa pa a tree aaidl and escaied escaped ' "Why Why " Wby , dadsaid dad ' laid said all the bey boy , . "hew hew "bow bow "how how " oan can c a turtleapr turtlespring tarUe turtle priag spring apr . aad and cUmk eUmb climb a tree ? " ' "Great Great " 8colt Scott c tt " reyUed repUed replied the fa ta- ta f tather father - ther , , . "he he .e e " . had bad te to ! ! " - A Congressional committee was wasmedIn wasmeeting wasmeeting medIn meeting , with President Wilson and andas andas andas as you can well Imagine many ot of otthe ofthe ofthe the good Representatives were shak shakIng shaktug shaking Ing tug the walls with their loud but un- un unI unrational unrational un-rational un rational - I rational oratory The Prez listened listenedpatiently listenedpatiently listenedpatiently patiently tor for a while wbile and then re related related related lated this . story .tory tory 'I I ' I am reminded of ofthe ofthe I the old Colored man down In Vir Vlr VirI VirI VirginIa Vlrginla Virginia I I ginIa ginla who was riding a mule and andwho andwho andwho who waa was caught in a violent thun thunderstorm thunderstorm thunderstorm derstorm while passing through a adense adense adense dense forest torest . . Although he tr trembled trembledat mbled mbledat at the horrifying borrltying peals penIs of thunder thunderhe thunderlie thunderbe he lie was thankful Ulankful for tor the occasional occasionalflashes occasionalflashes occasionalflashes flashes Of 9f of lightning which enabled enabledblm enabledhim enabledhim blm him to see bis bls his way At last he heprayed heprayed lrprayed prayed ' ' 0 Lawd If It s i jes the'ame thetame the theame 'ame ame tame ' ame to you , I d rather hev hey a little llttle littleless llttleless Uttl Uttlless less noise an a little Uttle more llehtl light ! ! * ' Theedere Theodore Reesevelt Roosevelt had this thislegend thislegend ( hilegeid * legeid leg-end leg end legend - on * bls his hi * White Hew Bouse House * desk"Tbe deskTbe desk 'The The "Tbe Tbe " ' value ef of a smlle-costs smlle costs smile-costs smile smllecostsnotblnlbut smilecostsnothingbut * mlle - - casts notblnl-but notblnl but nothing-but nothing ethlaig ' - b t create creates * mucb much rcb It is isrelli I Isrert . relli rest te to the weary-daylll'bt weary daylll'bt daylllbt wesry-daylight wesry daylight weary - - daylight ' to tothe tothe fthe the dJscouracec1--llunshlne dJscouracec1 llunshlne discouraged-sunshine discouraged sunshine discearag-ed discearag ed - - - shine to tothe tothe ( the .d-end .dend .d d end sad-and sad and . * d - - aimd atTe nature nature's natures ' * . belt best antidote antidote anti- anti antihe - dote fo'l fol for ' " trouble ! Ye-It Ye It Yes-it Yes & - - cannot cannotbe cannotbe he be beiight bauCbt bought , begged bel'red belred bogged ' , borrowed b rr wed or or.tolenfor orstolenfor r .tolen-for .tolenfor .tolen tolen for stolen-for stolen . t Iei - - fer It 1 & Is I * rmcthInK something that thatIs thatIs ( hatI Is * DO no e earth earthly I , good g , ood ed to t * aoybody- aoybody anybody- anybody aoybodyuntU anybodyuntil nyb dy - . untU until ntll It 1 & Is I * ! given riven away " A large Republican meeting was wasattended wasattended wasattended attended b by , . a mall small boy offenng offering offenngfor offeringfor offeringtor for sale lale tour puppies so yo ing mg their theireyes theireyes theireyes eyes were still unopened Get your yourMcKinley yourMcKinley yourMcKlnley McKinley pupal pups ! he shouted shoutE'd ' and andenjoyed andenjoyed andenjoyed enjoyed a brisk sale Two wt'eks wteks weeks wt'ekslater weekslater weekslater ' later the Democrats had a meet ngin ngin ng : In the same town and the little littleboy littleboy littleboy boy was again seen hawking ; an arm armtul armful armtul tul ful of pups Get your Bryan pups ! 'be be ' he be yelled this timeSee timeSee time timeSee See here said an onio onlo onto kerdidn ker kerdidnt didn didnt t I see you selling McKnley McK nley nleypups nleypups nicypupa pups here a few weeks ago ago7 ago7Yessir " ' Yes Yessir sir ' ' replied the lad n eekly eekly"but eekly"but eekly"but eeklybut "but but " these are different-they different they different - they ve ye got gottheir gottheir gottheir their eyes ope openS open I ' ' -S S - - SOf Of course we can t prove It but butGeorge butGeorge butGeorge George Washington is al1e alleged ed to tohave tohave tohave have become wearied with an om omclal omcial offlclal clal cial investigation which panded pandt"d pandtd parided " a s ascore sscore ascore score of experts through his cham chambers chambers chnmber bers * 'It It ' " It is my opinion he is q JOt io joted . , , ed that calling many w tnesses t4 ta t4prove taprove t tprove prove one fact is like add i s g a Ii large largi largeQuantity largiquantIty largQuantity * Quantity of water to a small qun qUd 1 , 1tit 1tity tit tity , . of brandy-it brandy it brandy - - it makes snakes It weakAt weak weakAt At Teheran Stalin Stalm drove hon hOlT boo e i . ipoint point with a yarn that FOR FDR FIlt ) is s d ii dto iito dto to be chuckling over still stili Tht Thtneighbor Thneighbor Th Thneighbor < neighbor of an Arab sheikrelated sheik relatedthe related I Ithe Ithe the Premier asked for the I nn an oj 01 oja 01a oa ) a rope I cannot lend it si sa as d the thi thesheik thisheik th Ixheik theI I sheik "I I 'I " ' need it to tie up my mllhwith miiiwith milt mllh miii Iwith with ' But surely rer ret rei.led reiled . I Ied ed Lhf thi Lhfother thiother lh lhother other , ' "you you 'you " you do not tie up your mllJl miii mllJlwith miiiwith miltwith with 11 a rope ? mllJlI I , . ' ' ' ' 'you you ' 'Brother Brother said the sheik whetyou whet you do not want to do a thing ont onreason on onreason reason Is as good gcod as anotherFDRoosevelt another anotherFDRoosevelt FDRoosevelt comm commenting ant in g on the thepromise thpromise th thpromise < promise of aid recE'ntl recEntl recently recenU ' " Sworn worn by s . small Imall mall pro-Allied pro Allied - - nation . , , t I lda Ids id ld a s nE'WS nEWS nE'WSpaper newspaper newspaper ' paper man that it reminded rl'mlnded rlmlnded ' him 0 u : uthe athe the of the Barbados story Island anc ancthe ancthe ancthe the last war The Barbados BI'rbados BIrbados Herbados ' WIt wiua ! ! a standing army of twelve men8 men \\8 8 aa \ ' waitaking ' , taking bows because It hadstoo had stoo stooready stooready stooready ready 'It It ' It was later learned that th thalaDd thIsland thislaad alaDd Island ! had bad Indeedstood indeed stood ready lJ Ii lJthe Iithe lithe the early days of the war it was dls dis dlsclosed disclosed disclosed closed a cablegram was dispalche dispatched dispatchetto dispatchedto ( to military mUltary leaders of 01 the Allie Alliet Allietcommand Alliecommand < < command " ' 'Success Success "Success ' it rea read " Bar liar BarbadOl liarbado Barbados badOl bado . m is behind behWnd you youl youi 1 " ' |