Show ON THE BRINCY icelen ol of e and tion lion oj oi an ocean voyage v getting a lato late start and the reasons the geror john jacobeou friendly reeling feeling for fellow travellers Trav ellers the parting hour yes we neatly nearly got left or of course it was nob odys fault it never is i eith either er of the other boys could have told you that at leaa they could have told you it their fault and im sure it was not arine I 1 had bad no idea it was so late when I 1 got up this morning and how was ito I 1 to remember that the boat weighed I 1 anchor at p v in I 1 think I 1 have quite enough e pon gh to burden my mind without taxing it with the hour when the steamships weigh anchor there is the doctor what did he have to do nothing absolutely nothing but aern remember aber the veen dam sailed at 0 and theres hank the matter with hank why he remember that 1 0 was the hour we were to sail he has done tothill no nothing thill since arriving in new kew york b but ut wonder why they dont plant central park with lucern and potatoes and thereby furnish work for the unemployed says he was on time Of purse he be was 0 on n time dont IL I 1 4 li nis b a c ED n 1 batte be hav abeen trl baj id if t am ill ni 1 will B CI 1 L IUVA 9 10 you think I 1 am crazy on time hide audze everybody on this ship on time the captain was on time the steward was on time the sailors were on time the gers gera were e on time did that moonfaced jay from Pump kinville suppose he was the only one that was on time what says that if I 1 insisted on seeing the town by lamp light we would have had haa plenty of time bah what does he be suppose I 1 am made of straw th think i ill im going to come all these miles and not see the city by lamp light think im to say that ive been somewhere and not be able to tell what there is ia to fee eee weeping jericho je if that the richest thing yet what are the street lights for if they are not to see aee the town by eh for blind men to feel left his big collar in the hotel and put his coat on in the cab serves him right dad burn him biml it serves hi him right why didn dian t he rein remember ember the timo time and then get up earlier had to stay up late to bring me home is anat what he be said ill be blank blank and double blanked if he baina the blanke test liar north of china had to bring brine 0 me home why such snob a thing has never happened to me in my life ile he have to bring me home he be could have left me where I 1 was I 1 was alright suppose im it a foundling what says I 1 was drunk me drunk intoxicated mejay dejay jones of Pumpkin villa under the influence of liquor mcgrand my grandfathers grand fathers clock what next I 1 never N ever was so sober in my life in fact had bad nothing to get drunk on olt but a few small email be beers ers not more than eighteen eighme en or thirty all told it was lie he if any one who was drunk it was he be that tried to light his cigar on an incandescent light and who worked hard bard to convince a policeman that irish was not the blo language guage spoken in the garden of eden edeo it was hank flank himself who tried to walk the tha full length of broadway broad nay n ay on hi hands and who swung hl his hat bat and shouted I hurrah furrah for pork chops because they were marked higher on the restaurant bulletin board bard than veil veal cutlets drunk dancing Methuselah 8 great grand father on his mothers sidel side I 1 was no more drunk thin than curfew must not ring tonight I 1 was no nearer being under tinder the iha influence of demon admon dink than chicago chica ca 0 is to paradise or pikes peak to siam fiam and hank knows it why that big row dong dong dona long dong the above yourth fourth of a dozen represent the don ging of the dinner bell reduced to miniature and they effectually put a stop to the great tale of woe that mr jay jones of greenwood county arizona seemed to think himself justified in inflicting on lit an innocent and peace loving man we too tco were later than we ave should have hase been in in getting down to the wharf for the band had ceased placing my country tn tia of thee etc etc and the gangway was just being raised when wu we made a spring and put pit our nice new valise ena end foremost forego fore t right on tile the round plum pudding stomach of one of our joval fellow voyagers and with our two disengaged hands and three and a halt feet of feet saved ourselves from being dampened in the briny deep we had no do doctor nor hank to blame for our nearly getting left however and we too delighted with everything to complain and find fault even if we had bad had a chanco chance tho the senia tion of pushing out to sea away from ones native land for the abe first time in life was to us u too unspeakably v pleasant to perri permit lit of any kind of unpleasantness whatever so as soon as we had recovered our valise valie which contained the photo of our dear sister and those of other aad less fellows sisters bisters and as elou as we had gendered len ien dered mr Dal Ci illington lington heaven aleso him tor for not bursting all over the ship aid to recover his breath and get the dent out of his stomach we sought a quiet part of the deck and proceeded at once to take an extremely touching and pathetic farewell of the dear old land of our nativity in loo looking kinc back at that remarkable and extraordinary event in the history of america we are at a loss to know why we took a farewell 1 e have never been able to use it since in fact we have never known what to do with it and might just as well have taken something else something more tangible and solid but no do we we just took a very warm ar ardent lent earnest vehement excited excil ed animated fiery enthusiastic fervent glowing glouid burning passionate moving melting tender and plain tive live valediction of the home of all our tender memories and the greatest republican victory the world lias has ever known an and dafter faller taking it we dried our eyes lit tile the last of a bunch of store cigarettes and went and smoked in mr jay joness face while he and his friend from Pu mAinville profaned the idame of hank and talked of joness narrow escape from losing the ship and having to walk over to england we were sorry the dinner gong interrupted mr jones animated and deeply interesting recital although we had never met the gentlemen before our young youn innocent heart warmed to them so BO that we drank in ill every word that was said and when they ordered for friend bake a bottle of something more bracing we took some of that also oh the pleasures of sea bea travel we have been on board nine days and expect to be at least another twenty bjur hours before we disembark the S S veendam is damn slow but we dont care were hardened weve watched handsome dignified ruen men with i it h good teeth and government commissions become tea lea sick gick and maidens with the coo of the dove in their voices the blush of the rose on their fair cheeks and india ink on their eyebrows have suddenly stopped slopped in their conversations with us and with both hands bands to their mouths months and their eyes popping out they have sought the tha vessels side and there sympathized as never before we have a festive cuss on board here froni from snake creek a side t how all by himself by birth a farmer and supporter of home industry by profession a dane ile he his been in america long enough to aspire to the office of road visor in the little town of jacobson where his son eon iian hans peter llin ain on is postmaster and now with three hundred and ten eng lih li h words worda impressed on his fertile brain bain and a pir p ir of leather boots boota arid and a four bit plug of horse shou shoo tobacco he is crossing back to his native land and as our gallant ship comes nearer and yet nearer dearer to that well remembered place where with wooden shoes attached to his red dimpled feet he be first saw the light of ua da his great sunshiny sun shiny heart and stomach gets warmer warnie rand and fuller of shine and liis his breath seems to improve ile he was not feeling well when the dinner bell sounded the birtt day out in fact lie he was sick eick and almot almost too weak to move his hia feet down tu to the saloon though we were told att erward by the moek meek englishman iho ft ho occupies with him the same state room liis his feet were strong enough to look after themselves still mr hanson was going to do his best ile he said vell veil I 1 dinks me pay do eat an me vill eat by aings and with one hand over hie mouth and the other grasing gra gras the railings failings rai lings he be made his its way to the lining dining t baloon and aad took his geat beat just opposite us so PO we could lock shina china in friendly embrace under the broening bro aning board ach i be sicker bicker sa at a dog said the ex road supervisor looking into our S friendly eye be dem blum blimps ps we ve nodded as we pushed the olives over to him his mouth watered is as he made a sav age jtb with hii fork and speared two fat olives with the remark it is gude I 1 dinks dey hit bit da lapot yes we glees they hit the spot he put them both in his mouth and almont before they had time lima to reach his palate his handsome features assumed a look of dire disgust both bands hew flew up to his bis mouth and the way he bolted for the hatchway was pathetic ile he wore his head lone done up in a towel for a week and though ho he often tried to join us at meal times limes be never could get firmly seated elated at the table before borne bome unfeeling wretch would pass him the olives aud and smilingly say eay have a plum mr it hanson I 1 think you will find thern them very refreshing arid and thereupon mr Uan Ilan soua neck deck would jump out of joint his bis lips shut with a clasp and his cheeks bun bung out like a brace of base basa balls hs bs hands would fly to his whiskers and our friend hanson front from jacobson greasewood county on snake creek would seek the deck tile the first three days out from new york were exceedingly stormy and rough but since then the weather has been superb and the sea as calm and smooth as could be desired and to add to our pleasure we have hare had the lie moon to light us at night and the stars seem to 10 have grown a good deal since coming on board for they are so BO large arga and brilliant they dont look like the american product at all we ve have had glorious nights on deck and in the biloon evenings in S of story telling and card playing of music and star gazing but we are all ail ready to go on oil again we have had a pleasant voyage and will remember with much gladness tile the half hundred cabin passengers who have hav helped to make it such nine days ago we were strangers all now wo we seem bound together by ties almost AS warm as those of friendship tomorrow most of us will disembark and separate at boulogne perhaps never to meet again and we aro are impatient forthe for the morrow to come nine days of association on ship board has roade made of us ui pilgrims from all parts odthe earth fri ends and coin pinions pau ions and some borne of us have grow grown n quite sentimental notwithstanding we hall with delight the prospects of landing tomorrow knowing that in an all hour afterward we will be ba so swallowed up tip in tile the field of 0 humanity that wu we may never again weep on each others necks decks we are DOW con telling each other to be sure pure and write art and g never to forget ti the happy hours thus spent together there is morrion on for instance ile ha says we look like his brother the one the hogs hoes lie ale up and he be is just broken hearted to think that wo get off at boulogne and he has to go on to amsterdam lie ile says he be knows his mother would like to see us u and we douht doubt it not bless her dear old poul foul she is blind and liis his titer ti ti r Nl marian arian the gentlest creature that ever powdered cheek or curled bang would amile smi io out of her great olive eyes on us lie if we would only oily come to his homp home at Ding ginglewood dinglewood lewood skunk valley idaho some tims time utter after his return irom from foreign climes then there is ia miss ply bivert girl who wants our autograph aulos raph and ancl lock of hair to match before abe quits the vessel we dont blame her in tile the least we think it is perfectly proper for young and beautiful girls to ask famous authors author and journalists for their autographs autograph and hair to match when about to separate perhaps for ever she shall certainly have ours oura even if it proves to be the last hair arid and autograph we have we are ura sure f we is ettish ish we were made of hair and so that each sweet girl that hears bears of our fame which like a light on a buthel buhel cannot be hid bid and feels in he her dear it innocent inocent heart as aa though the t he ho w uld like to steal us ua were it not wrong rong n to take that which belongs to another could take home with her for sweet cono consolations lations sake a very small piece of us our mother was wag a woman of the female persuasion and ever since that time lime we As have had a koft and velvety lapot in our heart and a another 11 on our head for the it air sex we ve love woman the whole bloomin it race of her we like to see her laugh with gladness and anything ele ebe at hand dejoy we joy in her joys and sorrow in her sorrows and whenever the chance presents itself we breathe blessings and sometimes onions on her beautiful weli groomed head we look at her and add in out oui thoughtful moods onder bonder in where here she would have been and what she would have been doing had it not been for evet eveh disobedience disobedience in t the he gardett Gir deri of eden and we say sav in in our heart of hearts heaven bles ble s eve for being so beautifully sinful what a blei bierling bieri sino ing she ebe haa baa been to this world what on earth would we have done without irit hout her bet it is remarkable what grand and sublime things have hare had fiad their commencement in the sin sill of disobedience the most eplen splendid did and glorious achievements this world his has ever known came as the result of taking fruit that was forbidden what would have become of this world anyway if grandma eve had not listened to be snake i echo answers what this is 4 question que tion that has caused us ua mountains of hard thought and has made many of our golden hairs turn white while and it is the question which today is stamping great wrinkles and seams on the foreheads fore beada beads of our brightest thinkers and which is well worthy the consideration of politicians from alpha to omega be they freethinkers or who would have built the ark who would have constructed the suei sue canal who would have discovered america and who would have become the father of his country if tho the forbidden fruit had bad never been tasted of what use to the world would mount sinai have been or jerusalem or salt like lake city N were ere it not for that hat little episode in the garden of E eden den who would have killed abel and who would ld cain have slain and where would the democratic party parly be today if none of edens lucious fruit had bad been forbidden these are burning questions of the day and should not be tabled after the first reading they deserve to live in the hearts of all people and should be agitated is as often as the legislature fleets meets until justice just Cri is done our mother eve and a status statue the goo good lady up a tree and adam adain down dawn below ready to cut aud and run as its as the master of the orchard appear be chis chiseled elod out of marble white as snow and set up in a conspicuous though warm anti and sunt duniy y place nace ill think tk of the debt we nye owe herl let ua lie all each eat u and every one fisk ask ourselves what colne holne would have done without her caesars caesara and gladiators and men to build |