Show SHE G GOT OT THE SACK 1 HOW bir IDIE LANCASTER WAS SAVED i FROM THE WABASH A arter 1 lne the matter six she concludes there Is in but one olio thing thine to 1 do and M A al molt takes the hie intal chinse ri 1603 by charles D leals she gained the bank of the river sit last I 1 lind and stood for a moment gazing across the I 1 majestically moving current at the forest on the other shore her face was very pale i aril and there was a look of wildness in her eyes but her firmly compressed lips proved that she had fully and firmly made up her mind to the desperate act yes yea birdie lancaster had bad decided to commit suicide by casting tier lier fair form 1 into the wabash sh river site she had not rushed things thing site she had taken a full hour to think the matter over aud and she had bad all the pros and cons there was a bushel buhel of iros to a peck of cons arld and when she finally came to realize the fact she left tier her fathers louse house to find a watery grave mother will be almost heartbroken she mused as ag she removed her tall fall hat but and hung bung it on a hickory limb but my resola I 1 N N 41 4 A 1 III 4 ui I 1 q J V now flow SHE WILL MISS MIT ME tion is taken if I 1 had a chousa thousand rid mothers to break their hearts I 1 would not draw drav back now I 1 wish I 1 bad brought along a glass to see sec how hov my hair looked two minutes galloped into the past then she ehe removed tier her gloves and said poor dear sister emma but how she will miss met it is hard bard to part from those you yon love end yet I 1 will stick to what I 1 said baid I 1 suppose it would bo be more stylish to be found drowned with lavender kid oil en but it will bo be all the same up there angela do not wear kids of any color two mole large full height minutes eil slipped into the past never to be heard of again and birdie whispered 1 I think I 1 will behind me as well I 1 am a much better figure without it and perhaps mumma mamma can cut it over for emma I 1 am now ready to take the fatal phinie I 1 wish I 1 had my powder rag gjere but I 1 must not bo be too particular about my looks poor manima mamma and emmal As to father he will probably be real glad of it as it vill trill save t berdiel Bir diel it was the voice voiced vo iceo of her lather and eho turned just as be burst through the bushes well site she haughtily queried budic birdie bu dic what would you do drown myself iny self sirl girl two hours ago I 1 told you I 1 tit must have a sealskin at sack ck with a storm col lr ir it if I 1 kept up with the procession s thin winter you refused to buy it therefore I 1 diel did birdie cant you possibly get along without ut it 1 I cannot every girl in my set act is going to have one and I 1 must either follow suit or lose the standing I 1 enjoy it is a sack or death 1 do you really mean it 1 I do come and get the cold cashill oh you dear sweet lovely darling old let me kiss you a thousand tiniest how kind and nob noble leand and genero generous in you to do it la is to be it SO 30 inch sack with a very high collar and regular seal and lined with brown satin and oh papa you have made your birdie so happy that she cau can hardly speak to you and the maje majetic majestic tic current rolled on and on and the tall sycamores amores on the banks of the wabash bowed their heads and smiled and tile the gre great at vultures a flying low croaked their disappointment and birdie lancaster wal was happy oh so happye THE ARIZONA KICKER A naster who ought to no bo run hun OS off the earth CAK cucil sucil TUI GS BL it is no secret that the editor publisher and proprietor of THE KICKER R who also conduct sa sit grocery meat market feed tore and boot and shoo batore under the same root roof and who is mayor of this town nod and state benator from this llila district and recognized leader of the in the community has had bad a longing to IDO be postmaster an eastern editor who gets his picture in a spelling book may dio die satisfied but a different ambition prevails in this unrestricted community we are a people who are willing to give every hustler a lift upward and no hustler can call get too much muc 11 office for upward of two years we have been trying to work the present ileum 7 7 IS 15 THIS A TO MR MK ANYHOW bent out and in but all our efforts have resulted iu in failure when rediscover ed cd that nothing could bo be done through the harrison waited patiently for that of cleveland but our waiting has been in vain the critter who is iu in seems secure in hig bis place on several occasions we have called the attention of the postmaster general to the manner in which our post postoffice office was run and we have still mother tri to offer we ve called at the office tile the oth other erday day to make a complaint bout lost mall mail the postmaster wits was 1 ciar alaba alt ba ting tg with tit his tet fet cocked 1111 11 1 and one of our lantern ke banges a nals big daod wd had entered therace the Pace when le be yelled what yer want here we area are a courteous courte oui oil oils by in instinct and cultivation and t there here ws no fin piyen in our voice as a we stated wilt errand before wit we had half finished ini shed lie pounded the with his bin hool hoof and shouted who is to me anyhow the swivel jointed cactus eater to pretend not to know us when we have shot him twice and licked him three times during du the last three earsl we be gan to get red behind t too be ears hut but we had our dignity to tom maritain mahi fintain tain anil and proceeded to reste restate the object of our call lie ile to us for or hit bair it 11 minute and then jumped up stud ordered u us 4 out of the office it if the miserable critter hid had any ally idea that his pulling a run gun on us would hasten our exit or abatte one jot of our lie he dincov tred aih mistake we bucked out certain ly A gentleman should be beable able to back out as well as it n mule the man wiio who wont back with the muzzle of 0 a revolver cooing loo ins at the end of 0 ili liis ilomay nose bit sawdust in liis ills head our exit wits was rs ns near chester fieldian flold ian as could bo be looked tor for under the q and we have nothing to regret in that direction it took us about seven minutes to go to the office buckle on our guna and return but wo we could find and nothing to shoot T abo he postmaster had bud hid den him himself elf and we have tailed failed to nut get sight of him to date although we want nant to be postmaster wo we are not biased on that account our complaint is the complaint of all others it is said that the critter was appointed because of his brins being related to a cabinet officer but any cabi cabinet net officer who would admit the tie ought to be run over by a herd berd of a thousand mules mule heis he is not only a postmaster who can barly mid and write but has no social stand st inkling ing arid and plays the poorest game of poker of 0 any official of the lust hist administration if over hearing bearing in his big manner to our home people hi conduct ton ard strangers in simply outrageous A couple of weeks ago a new england preacher who was on his bis vacation struck this town and called at tire the post office tor for mail which he was certain had reached it the postmaster was rag playing poker with blackfoot jim and yelled at it the pr eicher to get out the poor man was half scared beaded to death and know ahat to do when he called sit at THE office we lent him our guus guns and coached him on what to do and he be returned to the office brought both shooters to bear on the postmaster and demanded his mail ile he not only got six bix letters belonging to him but a dozen directed to other people and there were tears of gratitude in his eyes as he returned our weapons it seems to bo be the general feeling among our citizens that we ought to shoot the postmaster again and shoot him more fatally than ever before but we would rather rathe avoid trouble of that kind so long as it is known that we hunker hanker for his place it might look as it if wo we shot him to create a vacancy tor for our benefit however we shall give the matter our serious consideration II if lie he wont resign and return to mule whacking and if the postmaster ge genearl gener rl continues to be blind to the interests of his department something will be done by somebody and it will very U likely ely result lu in a bix hack back funeral procession |