Show or Ji ps p's pst p t MELISSA TURNS DOWN A PRINCE AND A GOOD FELLOW I declare it seems seems to to me as If I hadn't seen Sen you for about a month Melissa said Mrs maternal maternal maternal ma ma- maiden aunt Jane Not more than long enough at a time to ask you rou when you expected to be home Mrs laughed as musically as it is possible for a woman to laugh when she Is bent double with her herback herback herback back hair thrown forward I guess it Is about a month since Mr began calling isn't it 1 pursued Aunt Jane archly Mrs resumed her upright position with a jerk that threw her hair back About that dearie deane she replied and I dont don't mind owning that Im I'm beginning to breathe hard and get stitch In my side The pace Is certainly a little rapid for me You know Auntie dear Ive I've not been accustomed accustomed accustomed ac ac- ac- ac to it Poor Henry never took me mae out oftener than four nights In a week S I didn't suppose it was as often as that remarked Aunt Jane Youre a clever little guesser said her niece Four times was about the average for a year with Henry He was strong for the domestic domes domes- tic tie hearth and an early retT retreat at to the excelsior Henry was Once nce In a a. awhile awhile while an un Interesting an ane J instructive lecture on Ethical Culture Among the I Ancient Egyptians' Egyptians would lure him out and keep him up to the unearthly I hour of eleven at night and of course I Friend Wife shared in the giddy dissipation dis but tb tb never included things thing's like Uke broiled lobster and beverages The only fizzy stuff Henry approved of was a temperate temperate temperate tem tem- powder poor dear dean I No Mr Is different He must be very rich Aunt Jane hazarded No auntie hes he's not very rich hes he's merely rarely made a killing kUling corrected Mrs When a board of trade speculator mak makes s a killing the first thing he does is to buy a self- self starting six with electric and all aU modern conveniences and g get t Into a bunch That puts him out of all danger of getting rich especially when he acquires the little supper habit and Mr has got that In Its Hs His idea of ot heaven is isS acute S stages S u S. S I an all everlasting OL or not COL u cu vuu bottles bottleR and green Chartreuse with the celestial choir playing time rag-time behind a clump of artificial palms In green tubs My y dear protested Aunt Jane In Inc voice c it I. I shocked Mrs wound a thick strand experimental coil on the of f hair in an top of ot her ber head and considered the reflection in itt her mirror Well perhaps perhaps per per- haps Imps Im I'm wrong she said sald I I dont don't much thought really teany suppose he gives wheat Is about to a future state May to speculate as far ahead as be he cares But that bunch They've certainly y and let me mae out got cot to cut time the string or It 0 Melissa Me Me- Im Tm glad you feel that way war lissa Ussa dear said Aunt Jane JaDe This thing of or high living and peroxIde peroxide declared declared de do on nerves ide dyeing gets on my dared Mrs the female female fe to- I hope Im I'm not too male part of it to me particular but it does docs seem of pearls Is an single rope that a chest protector and I don dont don't t awful poor poor different like Hire to O look that from troll my sister supper eaters aters at the rest cure to take Well Im I'm going Se-reft Se rest auntie and change Mr a strong bear move move- against Is la up m ment bachelor may Of coUr course being a Il for tor his extravagance Aunt account Jane lane yane suggested If bo lie married and settled down It They never do said Mrs Morn Men Merrl settle up wid Once in a while they but but that's only when they've guessed once In a while they right and every even and then theres there's a self self- r tea wrong starting six for salo at at a n. sacrifice Owner can give excellent reasons for tor selling SlUng Dont Don't you ever think that astock a astock astock stock gamblers gambler's wife is going to make him put his winnings Into a B sate safe e three per cent solution of brine end carry his lunch to the office because she isn't dearie deane She's got to accept her Russian sables and diamonds without a cheep o of f protest If she doesn't some other lady will so she might as well wen resign herself to per her ier fate and enjoy herself until hubby comes home and tells tens her that have unexpectedly unexpectedly unexpectedly un un- un- un expectedly dropped six points Then shell she'll catch cold without the pearl rope I r really aUy thought that you thought seriously to Aunt Jane beganI began I do now and then said Mrs all an that saves me If I hadn't taken three or four tour s seconds to carefully weigh the advantages and disadvantages of ot Mr AIr from a matrimonial standpoint theres there's no telling what might have happened As AsIt Asit Asit it is Is I 1 fear me that the gentleman will honk his horn beneath my bower window about one more time tim and that will let him out Hes He's to give a farewell supper only he doesn't know it Im I'm not disposed to deny that hes he's a very nice man Inv in v very ry many respects but hes he's not to be trusted with matches anywhere neat money and I dont don't want to go to the expense of a fire proof fire proof safe for what poor Henry left me Well Im I'm glad observed Aunt Jane At the same time Im I'm a little surprised I dont don't see why you should be sur SUP C i c J S fi r- r fi S SS S i CONSIDERED HER REFLECTION IN THE MIRROR said Mrs 1 I dont don't say nay that Ive I've any particular objection to luxury I like good things to eat and drink and pretty things to looh at and to wear I like broiled lobster once In a while and I dont don't find champagne champagne cham hard to take all aU my life Iv Ive I've wanted sables and I certainly envied that woman the pearls she was wearIng wearing wear wear- ing lag but I also like to f feel l reasonably jure of a continuance of breakfast bacon bacon ba con and eggs and the ability to spring prin m myself self for a hundred dollar tailor tailor- made and a twenty five dollar hat hal once in a while Isn't that sensible Isn't it It logical what surprIse me said Aunt Jane If Mr could only think u up some way of ot enjoying himself il it wouldn't be so bad sighed Mrs Mer Men but breaking the speed ordinances nances to the tune of Good Bye My Lover and imbibing cocktails at every stop palls pails on a person of average average aver aver- age intellect after a little and what Mr calls the show proposition proposition proposition tion gives one an acute pain Im I'm fond of society but I 1 get si sick k of It when it means nothing but stale cig smoke and lare ca sandwiches and red faces and white and watery eyes and mandolin orchestras orches tras and stories that you jou dont don't know whether you ought to listen to or not That makes me think tenderly of the ancient Egyptians No dearie deane set your mind at rest Mr Is a good fellow and a prince and the tho salt of the earth when he isn't fresh but at tho s same me time hes he's a horrible example ex ex- ample and I shall be obliged to turn him down Nevertheless I feel that 1 J have deceived him cruelly crucHy How so queried Aunt Jane Ive made him think I was a good goodfellow goodfellow goodfellow fellow too and after all I 1 find that theres there's considerable of f the old hen about me replied Mrs Copyright 1912 by W 0 O. O Chapman |