Show Ici- Ici 5 j about Sports Broadcasters S SANTA ANTA MONICA CALIF Somebody said that there were always two big sporting events the events the one Graham Graham Graham Gra Gra- ham McNamee saw and the theone theone theone one that actually took place But alongside the present sports broadcasters Grahams Graham's wildest flight would sound like the dul dulcet et twitters twitters twit twit- tars of a timid love lovebird lovebird bird as compared with the last ray ray- ravings ravings ings of John lough Coaches brag of the lowe love lowered ed d percentage percent percent- age of serious football football football foot foot- ball accidents this fall But oh think of the radio who'll wind windup Irvin S. S Cobb up the season suffering suffering suf suf- fering from nervous exhaustion wrecked vocal chords violent rush of loud words to the mouth complete complete complete com com- collapse even madness You'll be passing the rest cure sanitarium and as the windows burst outward you'll hear pouring forth something like this Oh boy boyl boy with one tremendous tremendous tremendous dous burst Irish Goldberg is jamming jamming jamming jam jam- ming his way from the red back backline backline backline line right through the bl black ck interference interference interference inter inter- ference Nothing can stop him But dont don't get worked up What you hear is merely a convalescent microphone orator mentioning a checker game between two fellow- fellow inmates and reverting to form Virtues In Snakes I said recently about S SOMETHING the folly of or kill killing ng every snake on sight without investigating the snakes snake's character brought a flock of letters from rom readers who dont don't like snakes Even a so called venomous snake may have his better side In Kansas Kansas Kan Kan- sas in the old local option days you could get a drink only on a doctors doctor's doctors doc doe tors tor's prescription excepting in case of dire emergency such as a snake bite So every properly run drug drugstore drugstore drugstore store kept a rattlesnake on the premises to serve the citizenry lAnd Anc the only time a drug store rattler rattier ever refused to bite a thirsty stranger stranger stran stran- ger was when he was all worn out from accommodating the regular local trade And what though it was a snake that led Eve astray in the tile garden of Eden He may have brought sin into the world but wouldn't we have missed a lot of spicy reading matter matter mat mat- ter fer in newspapers if he hadn't Yep I plead guilty guilt to thinking an occasional charitable thought for Jor any any decimated and vanishing group I feel that way about old line Republicans Republicans Re Re- publicans and mustache cups and andred andred andred red woolen pulse warmers Poli Political lal Predictions E TAKE the opportunity to announce announce an an- WE that the Literary Digest Digest Di Di- gest or rather its journalistic successor suc sue cessor censor will not conduct a poll on next years year's congressional and state elections The burnt child dreads the poll Let others go around taking straw votes but the way the Digest folks feel now feel now and in fact have felt ever since last November they wouldn't start a canvass to prove that two and two make four Because look here what here what if it it should turn out that two and two merely make some more Marx brothers or a double set of Siamese twins wins I Anyhow the he b business siness of basing cocksure predictions on half-cocked half estimates c doesn't t seem to be flourishing flour flour- flourishing these days Figures dont don't lie but the citizens who furnish the figures m may y ydo do so either unintentionally unintentionally or just for the sake of a n laugh The rise of candid say zing say say we just thought up that word word proves proves that a photograph photograph photo photo- graph of things as they are is mightier than a lot of loose statistics statistics sta sta- predicated on what the voters vot vote voters ers may mayor or may not do and do-and and pr probably probably bably b- b ably wont won't when the time comes Forgotten Fore Stars NCE interviewers clamored for fora O ONCE a hearing and her face was on half the magazine covers and her name in letters of flaming light above all the marquees Once impressive impressive impressive im im- tycoons catered to her temperamental temperamental temperamental tem tem- whims press agents waited upon her courtiers attending attending attending attend attend- ing a queen Autograph seekers besieged her then while now only bill collectors desire her signature and and they'd like to have it on a n check Speak of her to the newer generation and somebody will say Who Spell It please She is all through all washed up But like the de deaf husband whose wife has slipped will be the last person in town to hear the Ule news Having traveled a road rond which is issues issues issues is- is sues mighty few trip round tickets she still dreams of a come comeback She is s the most tragic and the most pitiable figure figure and and one of the Ule to commonest be found in this place called Hollywood She is any anyone anyone anyone one of the host men and women who ten years ago or even five were glittering stars in IRVIN S. 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