Show e CiL minding I Your Business ANTA MONICA CALIF I. I SANTA A society is forming in England for the defense of the former Edward VIII now the duke of Windsor and honorary honorary honorary hon hon- citizen of all places inthis in inI inthis I this country named for the Simpson family This society does not hope to r re restore restore re- re store the duke to the throne That would not only annoy annoy an an- noy the archbishop of Canterbury he already already already al al- ready having things to annoy him such as Americans but would seriously upset upset up up- a. a set Mr Stanley os j H Baldwin Baldwin who vho upsets j so easily that it seems strange the T British never have thought of calling him Reversible Stan Irvin IrvinS S. S Cobb Besides the throne would be qt quite tc crowded i if lithe the duke tried to snuggle in there along alona with the present occupants What some of us over here think thip and anci that goes for many Canadians too too too-is is that England has a crying need for a society dedicated to th the broad general principle of ot minding the its own business and suffering duke and his wife to mind theirs We have a rough idea that both of oC them can better endure long dis tance snubs than officious meddling in in their private affairs Just being an ex ling is a hard enough lob job job even i if you can get it to do Political Afterthoughts I 1 MASTER ASTER ROLLO aged seven and city raised was visiting relatives in the country On his first came in wearing a worried cast of countenance Mother he said Ive been out under the mulberry trees Yes Mother do mulberries have hard hardbacks hardbacks hardbacks backs and six legs and arid crawl around on the ground Why certainly not Then Mother said Rollo in stricken tones I feel I have made madea a dreadful mistake What's the point Oh nothing only I got to imagining what the broodIng brooding brood brood- ing regrets of some members of oC the administration and nd a major majority ty of ot the members of oC the senate must be when they recall the alacrity with which they moved to fill fiU a certain recent vacancy in a certain very high court court in in fact the highest one weve we've got r t. t Hirsute Virility PARISIAN ARISIAN believe a dense arboreal effect of whiskers is proof that that the wearer is i indeed deed deeda a man without in nil all cases being absolutely convincing about it We haven't gone that far yet but butI I 1 would like to know whence comes this notion of appraising masculine vigor by the amount of ot hair along the bone breast bone Morbid I calls it Two distinguished authors battle when one intimates the other is scantily adorned in that regard forgetting forgetting forgetting for for- getting that in the immature summer summer sum sum- mer of his kind an author has but a scanty growth as compared compared compared com com- pared with the richer winter coat And then prying reporters ask the new prince of the movies whether he has any fleece at all upon his chest their tone indicating they rather expected to find trailing arbutus there or at least some shy anemone Years ago In the hospital when I Iwas Iwas Iwas was being shorn for an operation I remember remarking g to myself that here was the only barber who'd ever ever ver work worked d on me without trying to sell me a bottle of hair tonic Miss America America 1937 A A T LAST some rational excuse excuse- in m moral values anyhow has anyhow has been found for a so-called so national beauty contest The year seventeen New Jersey Jersey Jersey Jer Jer- sey girl chosen as Miss America of 1937 is not going into vaudeville is not going to make any personal appearances is not coming to Hollywood Hollywood hollywood Holly Holly- wood for tor a screen test is not going to accept a radio contract is not even going to write her life lite story for publication 1 She will return to school and to the normal home life of ot a well raised normal girl that girl that is unless she changes her mind about it all If It she shouldn't change her mind I she stands out as ns probably the sanest sanest san sanest san san- est young person of her age at present present present pres pres- ent residing on this continent or should we say this planet If she should change her mindwell mindwell mind mind- I well the American populace has be been n fooled man many a time and oft be be- fore Our grandfathers didn't be be- Bove human beings ever could fly Our fathers didn't believe anybody would ever lick John L. L St St. Sullivan livan Only the other day our United States senators didn't believe their fellow fellow- statesman Mr Black of Alabama could be a Klansman They thought that low but persistent sound of ot Klux Ku Klux Ku was but the voice oice of a modest hen IRVIN S. S COBB COBS Service |