| Show what d. d J t thinks about Our Good Will Ambassador BEVERLY BEVERLY HILLS CALIF L What better salesman of good will and brotherly understanding understanding understanding un un- un- un could we wc send to our great sister republics in ill inthe inthe the lower half of this hemisphere hemisphere hemis hemis- phere than our own myn president Who carries for his samples his personality and his spoken words If It in the past we wc looked mainly to the thc old world for our markets it is certain that in the future we wePT PT must increasingly r cultivate the Latin 1 stocks o of the new t world on a conA continent con con- A 4 4 whose Incredible incredible ible natural resources l Wf es Cs are for a great part still virgin and nations who must be cured of persisting beliefs that the Irvin Irin S. S Cobb Monroe doctrine is for them a threat and not a shield If yesterday was Europe's and today is North Americas America's then surely surely surely sure sure- ly the promise of tomorrow belongs to South America S I Tugwell's New Job N NOW that brother Tugwell almost the last surviving lobe of the original brain trust has left the government flat fiat folks are wo wondering wondering wonder wonder- dering der- der ing how bow hell he'll make out in hi new line Dont Don't worry anybody To some the molasses business might b e sticky sUcky but it offers no obstacles to toa a young gentleman who wrote and what's more had p published a n poem with this deathless refrain n I will now roll up my mj sleeves and remake America Am Mark the words in six months hell he'll be an outstanding baron and inside of a year the acknowledged taffy-kisses taffy king of North America And pretty soon well we'll be lasses conscious to a n point where the effect will be that the entire country is paved with fresh fly I wouldn't be surprised to see us using caramels for currency And Andas as for peanut brittle well brittle well Ive I've already already already al al- al- al ready started hoarding S S n II Daces Dace's Son in Mussolini let the word VV V V percolate that he was grooming grooming groom groom- ing lag that new son-in-law son to fill his dictatorial boots he must have meant what he hinted at Because latest photographs show the heir apparent with his jaw also thrust forward his brows also knit in menacing frown and his plumpish bosom inn inflated ted until his medals stand forth like carnival tags on a marquee The likeness to the original model is so perfect that II 11 Duce could use a picture of the young man for fora a hand mirror it seems fitting that thit Italy having kicked the dove of peace in the pants should cherish cherish cher cher- ish the pouter pigeon pose to typify y defiance S The Language of Lawyers I T I REGRET I didn't think this up 1 first first first- some dirty plagiarist is always thinking up something before before be be- fore I get around to doing so But ButI I feel it my duty to help spread it around especially since it was a lawyer who wrote it Im I'm quoting him I If uIt a layman byman gives an orange to you he simply says Have an or or- ange But when a lawyer puts the transaction in legal form he writes I 1 hereby give and convey all nil and singular my estate and Interests right rich title tithe claim and advantages of and in said orange together with I all its rind juice pulp and pips and all aU rights and advantages therein there there- I in with willi full power to bite cut suck I and otherwise to eat cat the same same or or give the same away with or without I the rind skin juice pulp or pips anything hereinbefore or hereinafter or orin in any other means of whatever nature or kind whatsoever to the contrary In any wise vise ing And then another lawyer comes along and takes it away from you S Underdone Movie Hams Dams A A MEDICAL journal reports that thata a preventative has been found for fir trichina But Im I'm afraid arald its it's too late to do anything for some of our Hollywood folk actor trichina I being a thing common common to underdone underdone underdone under under- done hams A lot of us who came out here as greenhorns and went to c cutting up for the screen have an alibi When the movie critics accuse accuse accuse ac ac- ac- ac cuse us of having contracted the disease dis ease of bad acting our defense is that wed we'd been exposed to It Yet the films have produced a grand crand crop of good actors out of very raw material too sometimes And they keep right on doing so notwithstanding that every now and then the Ule popular fancy picks on some male beauty with a set of educated eyelashes and the winsome winsome winsome win win- some trick of a languishing glance J IRVIN VIN S. S COBB Copyright |
