Show ONCE ONCE OVER OVER- The Great Ticket-Agent Ticket Conspiracy By By H. H I. I PHILLIPS PHILLIP WE WE ARE IN RECEIPT of a com com- communication from Thaddeus P. P Americas America's leading Second In Line man with regard to a are recent re recent cent column recording the seeming ly Iy endless red tape required to get I railroad transportation to any fairly distant point Have you ever been the man directly behind the tho firstman first firstman man at the ticket window he ho de de- mands mends If It not you dont don't know what tough going really is Is If you want to pity somebody pity me I 1 have bave never dashed to a railroad ticket window In my life lire seeking a ticket for a mile SO trip without finding directly ahead of me mo usually b by a nose nose some lome guy euy seeking transportation to Afghanistan via New Orleans and Carson CIt City with a stopover stopover stop atop over at Eggplant t ik k be he continues continue If It I am not in a treat great sweat he be ma may not be coIng co- co Lug Ing quite so 10 far but let me sue be beIn beIn bein In a burr hurry burry and I am certain to find In front of me a f fellow lIow who has bal received the orders order Find Dr lr Livingstone and I la I. makin making alt all the arrangements with epee ape special cial elal attention to drawing rooms room etc eto I think the ticket window clerks clerk a and these birds are In cahoots They both have such fun run together It n seems seem to me 1 I suspect they have signals signal which are flashed the moment moment mo mo- ment meat I appear at the tho station and tart start galloping for tor the window Yes Yu there thero are aro other window windows Sure One On ha has ba a little sign ign Mr But ha h. ties a great Ireat eye eyelie He n. sees eel ee the customer FIRSTI FIRST And caa can he h. grab crab a bunch of papers papera t etc and bide taU fast I Anther window announces that Air Mr Is In charge charre Yeah but buS he is always on the phone checking an upper for somebody who cant can't be intending In ID- tending to board a train this season Maybe It cant can't ba bo helped Perhaps making out and stamping the necessary nece papers papera for a trip of any distance Is II a difficult job nut But the ticket window boys bOYI could toss loss a smile andle to the tho Second Guy In Line couldn't they Do ia they have to tobe tobe tobe be so ao and unconcerned unconcerned Would It hurt to throw out a kindly Ill iII be with you ou In 10 a few minutes minutes' Must they always al ale ways register the mood which seems to lo say Brother rother If U you expect to go CO out of town toda today youre you're crazy More people are nervous wreck wrecks s from being second In line IIno than from any all other feature of travel Within my own family there are arc horrible examples example I have an Uncle Gidean who went to a railroad terminal in a big city In the th spring of 1023 1029 and ha has not been heard from since My Aunt Hazel Hue from Oil OU City Pa P. left len home to get tickets ticket and a compartment com corn to Florida 11 M weeks week ago go and we Just jut got a letter from the Missing Mining Person Persons Bureau saying laying she h hIt It Is It atm in line at the Number Two Pot Post I had a cousin Chidsey who left len home to get tome some railroad transportation covering miles mile once He II It made It within a month I but had a letter from the President dent the mayor and end our lour top politician cian elana So your recent eca el of your our troubles a as Number One man an at a window leaves leave me ine me cold Try being the Uie NUMber T Tw Th Boy Do It II will wiD be unforgettable bub |