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Show SEEN SEENahQ EENa JEAD JEADMAIN ahQ HEARD "EARD EARD " HEARDo I IMMNS < o/ o / MMNS MAIN - STIIUT STIIUTNV NV aIL ET I I _ 7 , , l lrstT ' , 4 ' rstT rstTp rstTThe l . " I \ . - rstTS I p J S ' I " I The depiession deplesslOn must be oviT OVt'f OVtf over ' We Weknow Weknew know pcrmitIred O\\ O Osecral \ several se\cral se cral se\eral eral \ husbands who permit permit- permitted pcrmit-I pcrmit I permitted - ted red their the1r " wives "lIVes lIVes to cash the checksI checksthey checksthey checks checksthey I they received rece1ved for Christmas Chn.stmas Chnstmas . * . * . * . DefinitIonREPUBLICAN Definition DefinitionREPUBLICAN REPUBLICAN A guy who be- be belie beBeres be believes - lie\- lie lieves liecs Beres \ - cs the Literary Digest D1gest poll on an onthe onthe the poll political tical sentiment of the thecoun thecountry thecountry coun country try . * . . II ItIS It is Iiard bard hard for Mike Mikc : Dougan to tounderstand tounderstand tounderstand understand ' \ why hy more than half halfof halfof halfof of those votmgr voting were agamst against againstRooseclt agamstROo againstRoosevelt Roose\clt Roose clt ROo c\elt c elt \ , He lie thought at least leasthalf leasthalf half were getting gO\ gO gOcrnment go governmentchecks \ crnmentchecks crnment crnmentchecks checks . . . * . . Merle Morse ' ' Give me some of ofthat ofthat ofthat that prepared monooceticocidestcr monooceticocidester monooceticocldesterof monooceticocidestcrof monooceticocidesterof of salicylic saUcyhc acid aC1d ' Jack You Von : : "Do Do " you mean meanaspirm meanaspirin meanaspinn aspirm aspirin ? ' ' Merle ' , ' "That's Thats 'That's That's " ' right , aspirin , I Ican Ican Ican can ii nevei neve1 eves remember that name " * . * . * . rictch Fletch Hammond , , pleading pleadmg in incourt Incourt Incourt court for the victim of a II . motor motorcar motorcar motorcar car accident ' * . "Gentlemen Gentlemen " of ot the thejury thejury thejury jury , , the driver of the cai cm car said saidthat saidthat saidthat that he " was "as as tiaveling tlaveling at onlv onl'1 onl1 only ' five 'mlles mlles ' miles an hom hOUl hour Think Tlunk 01 of the agon agony agonyof agonvof ) of my po pool pooi : ) ! unfortunate 1ll1fortunate client clifnt GS as asthe GSI asthe I the car drove so sloivly slo\vly slo vly slowly \ ovei ovel hisbody h1sbody his h1s body bodyI I ' " . . . Little Johnny is 1S getting gettmg to be beqUlte bequite bequite qUlte quite a big b1g lad noGrowmg now no\\ no not \ Growing Growmg likethe llkethe like llke likethe the public pubhc debt , , his Ius dad saysI says . . . I I A Scotehmantakened Scotchman Scotehman \ wakened nakclled \takened takened one oneI onemorning onemorning I mornmg morning to ( o find hisufe his " \ vnfe \ufe ufe ICe had haddied haddied idled hadidled died during durmg th the thc < . , night I11ght With WJth 1'itli 1itli % ' admirable ad- ad adImrable ad admirable - mirable Imrable presence of mind nund he hecalled hecalled hecalled called down to the miid nl"ud nlud ninid " in 111 the - " ' ' need tocook to kitchen below , , "Ye'll Yell "Ye'D YeD ' cook but one egg for breakfastthis breakfastthis breakfast breakfastthis , . this morning morlllng , , \ Maggie 1\Iagglc 1 Iagglc bfaaggie . . " . . . "I'm Im "I'n1 In1 " ' ' aU all excited today . My My'Son Myson Myson 'Son Son ' is going gomg to play Beethoven Beethovenin in public for the first fast time to- to tomght tonight to-night to night - mght night . . " "That That "That's Thats " ' . fine , my de deir de'lr delr ' tr , , and I Ihope Ihope l lhope hope he defeats dcCeat.q dcCeatq . him : . " ' * . * . * . DefinitionPOPULAR DefinitionPOPULAR Definition DefinitionPOPULAR POPULAR GOVERNMENT The Thefirst Thefirst Thefirst administra admmistra- admmistra adminlstra- adminlstra admmistralion adminlstration administration - first two vears years ears of any tion lion . . * . * . * . A \ woman oman spends mo most t or orher of 4 , 4A her herhme hertime hertime hme time during dunng the day making herhouse her herhouse herhouse house and herself attractive to toher toher toher her man . , and half bnlf the mghtnOlldeling nightwoudeiing night mght nightwondering wondering nOlldeling woudeiing where he is . . * . + * . + * . , Muss-ini Muss ini Musslinxs Musslim - ; : ] s : aimy nmy u is . u > miking m'1kfng m1kfng making ' pretty prettyI prettygood prettygood prettygood I I IMussini good headway hendway and things lo looc loo : ) , < t , rosy rosyBut I IBut IBut But Butait , \ wait \\ait ait , \ ait until he begins begms to run mtoI intoI mtobonus intobonus into mto intobonus I bonus troubleI trouble I * . e . * . I ! I"Come "Come Come " on , Johnny . . These lit- lit litI littie littie lit little - - I ' ' " tle tie pigs won't wont hurt you ' ' Oh , , yes es they will ! ! ! Just Ju'St ' a . fewminu'es few fewmlnu'es fewminu mlnu'es mlnues minu'es minues ' cs " ' ago "lgo lgo 'igo igo I saw ' 'em em ' c11'1se c111se cliise c11'1setht cliisetint cliisethit fewI ' I tht tint " ! big one , , knock her down downand , and start strt : to chew herest her \ vest \est est cst but- but buttons buttons but buttons - tons d/f d f djf cif / . . " . " butI I * . * . * . Politicians pohtic1ans , , savs sns says } Ralph Fletcher FIetchcrmake , . 'I I ' make strange bedfellows bedft.lfuws bedftlfuws be ditiknvs . , , but theyusually theyusually they theyusually usually get used to the . same bunk * . * . i . , iDad Dad Bceson Beeson eeson wonders wonder ' > why whyauto whyauto whyauto auto manufacturers manufacturer don't dont ' ' makecolTms makecoffins make makecoffins coffins colTms during dunng the off otT season . * . . . IAnother I IAnother Another Meanest Man is JS the guy guywho guywho I Iwho who let his lus girl whistle v . when then hen she shepuckered shepuckered shepuckered puckered up her lips to sho show , , him lum lumshe himshe himshe sheI I she could whistle * . * . . NATURE usually balancesthings balances balancesthmgs balancesthings I thmgs things up , and the man mean meanenough meanenough meanenough enough to beat his Ius wife w1le usuallygets usuallygets usually usuallygets meanI I getsone gets one that 4 . desf deserves . > rves . it . . Just found out why a v " , ell-trained ell trained tell-trained tell telltrainedinfant , ell-trainedinfant ell trainedinfant - I Imfant mfant infant never cries at a public gath gath- gathering gathering - ering ermg he isn 15n t there |
