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Show A / [ , Humoro Humoroa HumoroA a - A CERT . A dear old lady from the country countrywas countrywas y was attpndm attPndmg ; : her first race meetin mcetlnJ , ; , alld and b'1 b1 Ilid ' 1 < badeed backed her first horse horseAfter horseAfter After placIng her bet she returned returnedt returnedto t to ber her grandson son "My My " My : dear , " , " she said e excitedly eecltedly cltedly , , ' I m mso mso r.so rso . . 1 so glad my horse Is going g01Dg to win , , " ' "But But " why are you so sure Bure , grandrua grand grandma grandma ma 7 ? " a asked lted the boy . "Nothings Nothings "Noth1Dg Noth1Dg " s a acertainty acertainty scertainty 1 certainty , you know . " " "Oh Oh " , but this is , , " said the tbe dear old oldthing oldthing ol'1thing ol1thing ' thing "The The " bookmaker bookmal.er bookmaler . said smd that my myhorse myhorse mhorse , horse was starting at twenty to one oneand oneand onand i and the race Isn't Isnt 18n't 18nt ' timed to start un untll untit until tll tit t tw two " 0 o o'clockLondoD o'clockLondon o'clock oclock ' " -LondoD LondoD -London London - London AnswersBorrowed Answers AnswersBorrowed Borrowed PlumesThe PlumesThe Plumes PlumesThe The two tramps were trudgin trudgmf trudging trudgingwearily : ; ; wearily along the rough country roatIPresently roadPresently road roatI roadPresently Presently Dusty Dnsty allowed his Ius Imag ImagInatIon ImagInation ImagInation InatIon to wander . , e ' I say , Fred rred , , " h he said saidto -to to - - his bis cornpamon com corn compnmon cornpamon pnmon pamon , "if if " sou you ou had a dollar In yourpocket your yourpocket youipocket . pocket , what would you ou think thlnl " of of ? ? ' Fred rred allowed his hands to stray strayInto strayinto stra ; Into his trousers pockets pockets"H'ro pockets"R'm pockets"H'm " ' " ' he sniffed them themout themout thenout "H'ro Hro "R'm Rm "H'm Hm : , , brInginthem bringing brIng-in/ brIng in - / : out empty . Td "I'd Id " * ' ' think thmk I had somebody some- some somebody somebody - - body else's elses ' clothes on " Breakine Brea.kmg Breakmg Breaking . a n Monopoly . I "I'm Im " ' ' ' . ' ifrald 1.frald 1frald 'ifratd ifratd the country suffered buffered n a ngre'lt agreat ; greit gre'lt grelt great ' loss when "hen hen " they filled f'llled fllled failed ' to senel send sendour senour . our eloquent and able friend bick b'1ck b1ck back ' to tocongress tcongress , " congress 'Not Not ' .Not Not . it 'lt lt ' it all , " replied Senator Sor Sorghum Sorghum Soghum ghum ghumC ghumThe C ' The sense senc ( , of the plain plnln peopie peo peopIe pepie pIe again ngam pre prelalled p e ' ailed Why should the thelecture thelecture thlecture i lecture platform be robbed that the thebrainy thebrainy thbrainy brainy men may be ' issembled 'lssembled lssembled assembled tlisten to tolisten tolisten > listen to one another , " where "here here Instruc InstrucHon Instruction Instructlon Hon tion is 18 superflous'9 superflous9 superfious superflous ? ' ' ' ' QUITE TRUE TRUEne TRUEAn - tonednew An iKS Insurance agent 1 bad had badnew t0 toned new ne lIfe to Jnsure Insure JnsureTlllting InsureTaking Taking Tlllting out his notebook and he pencihe commenced to ask the penel penci haS usual hat has hatneyed hasneyed a- a aoM ( - " ncycd neyed questions"Now questions questionssir "Now Now " , sir ; , " ' he be said . , 'how how ' oM old you7 aryou7 aryou you ? ' ar The simple looking little l1ttIe ilttie m r1scratched scratched mscratched his held he'ld he'td hetd ' ' thoughtfUlly thoughtfuliq thoughtfull , . , ' "I I " I wis W'lS WlS was ' forty last . . , t ' birthday blrthcar blrttltiay } . " , saId bsaId nSrtThe d , ' and I 111 11 be forty two nen new nSrt . " ' b - The agent gl5ped'J ga&ped gaped gl\5ped gl 5ped gasped \ & A ABut gmuS"you've gmuSyouve . /But But / 'But But ' But . , "y y my " tie-- tie de'1r de1r dear tieeir - ' " - eir sIr . , " he smIl slnil 'J J ' smIl"you slnil"you're " ' ' , "you you "you're youre c got tilings things a bit nil d.lyou dlyou Iyou mlxed mixed . . , I , you ii \ were ere forty fortr last birthda yoube qonbe birthday blrthday , , you qon be forty one neet ne t birthday . " - ; - ' Oh . , no , , " ' sild sld , the man "I'm Im " ' ' tortlone fortyone one today " mrortjr tortl forty fort Scz 5cz Youl Yout YoulThe YoutThe You ! aThe The pitlent p1.t1ent p1t1ent p . ttient ' : schoolmistress :1choOlmlstTcss 1choOlmlstTcss w wteaching teaching a number of tiny chlldre ehtldre chlldr chlldretholr ehtldrethoir thoir tholr nrst first lesson leson ' ! In a school schooJ % It w the wthe alphabet alphabetAfter alphabetAfter . After much coa coaling coning ln they had man maa aged managed maaaged to learn up to the letter " 0 0-1 0 1 - " ' "w'hacome whacome "No No "Noll Noll "N N " < ro " , Bobby iby Best Best , . , " she salcl salll said . , "wha wha "who who " ' . , "whacomec "whocomes comec comes ; ' ? after'0 after0 after 'O O ' 'O'7 O7 ' ' ? " S Bobby , wlio who for one 1an so 80 you young wan wan w w1an an ardent Him film fan . , raised hig hJs hls cy ey or ; brows cybrows eybrows knowingly l.nowl lnowl . ly . , "Why Why " , tcicher te'1cher te1cher teacher ' . , 'I I 'K K ' ( ' K ' comes next neat , , " S.replied Sreplied . replied repliedShort _ 1 1Short II Short Weight * ' I reilly re'1l1y re1l1y really ' don't dont ' know l.now lnow . what to dabout d dabout dlabout about Jim , " said Kitty distractedli distracted ! "Ever Ever " . since s.ince I met him last year ho he he'only heonly ' . only gi gi\en gi en glen \ , en me a bushel of kisses ktsses kisses"t kissest kisses"t"Bushel . . , " 1 1"Bushe17 "Bushel Bushel "Bushe17 Bushe17 " ? ' rept repeated > nted Jean Je1ln "Wha Wha "Whaever "Whever Whever " 1yh * ever do you mean by that that7 ? ' "Why Why HWhy " , four pecks , of course : , " ' e eplained eiplained plained KittyFeminine Kitty "a a " _ _ A AFeminine Feminine IndependenceThe Indc Independence Independence'iThe endencc -'iThe 'iThe iThe - ' .rho rho The ' . Lidv L'1dv L1dv L'idv ' ' at No 2Q-Whllt 2Q Whllt 20-1Vhat 20 1Vhat 20 - - What did yo ye yosay yesay yoi say when "hen hen ripen " ' iour 'our our lour husband husbnnd objected t'Vour tyour t ; vour 'Vour your ' wearing v . enrmg French rrench heels heels7 ? ft Tlie The Lady at No 22-1 22 1 22-I I 22 - 1 told him himwasn't him"w himw " , . wasn't wasnt " ' isn't isnt 'Isn't ' going to lower myselfplease myselfplease myself iplease please any man . . Qi Dangerous Risibility Ri'lbaJ.ty RilbaJ.ty RilbaJty ' . l1 Z l1"If Z"If "If If " I see anything funny , , I sunpl slmp1 sInlpl sInlplcan't slmp1can't can't cant ' keep heep a straight face fllce " > "You You " must find shaving ratherticklish rather ratherticklish ticklish tlel.hsh tlelhsh . business " < ti |