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Show Curre CurreWit Wit Witandr andr A MEATIER MEALHe MEAL MEALHe He IIe was a thin , ragged raJged Ul uiehin urchin chin and andhe andhe andhe he had h1d crawled In under the circus circustent circustent circustent tent ' Ihe 'lhe lhe the manager mannger nabbed him 'Do Do 'Doou ' Do Doyou Doiou \ou ou you . \ know"oh'lt know "oh'lt"oe \ " wliat \"oh'lt "oh'lt ohlt what ' \ " we \"oe "oe oe do1th do \ with \\1th 1th boys hke like like3ou likeiou 3ou ou ? ' ' ' he thundered 'We We ' We make meat meatof meatof meatof of them for the lions Here Bere , , C1rl Carl . Carlthrow ' , , thro throve " him into the lions cage " The youngster oungster looked 1001\ed 1001 ed \ up at him him'lnd himInd himand 'lnd lnd Ind ' said , ' Oh , mister , let me see the theshow theshow show < , how for nothing and ' I'll Ill ' have h'lve hlve ' tbe the tbef'lttest thefattest thefattest f'lttest flttest fattest ' boys in the place crawling crawllng un on under ontier under der tier the tent tomorrow-Boston tomorrow Boston tomorrow , . " - Boston Eve Evening Evening ve vening ning Transcript Transcflpt . . TranscriptEqual Equal to EmergencyC'1pt1lDNow EmergencyC'lphinNov Emercency Emergency EmercencyCaptain C'1pt1lD-Now C'1pt1lD C1pt1lD Now C'lphin-Nov C'lphin Clphin Nov Captain ' ' - Now , suppose suppo&e suppoe & you are on onduty onduty onduty duty one dark nightSuddenly night night- . - Suddenly a aperson aperson aperson person appears allpe'lrS allpelrS ' fiom flom from behind and andwr'lps andwraps andwraps wr'lps wrlps wraps ' two irms trms round you . \ ou so tiltyou th'lt thlt tilt th'ltyou thatyou ' you can cnn t use your rifle What would wouldSou wouldyou Sou ou say sayCadetLet S1 sav ? C'ldet-Let C'ldet Cldet Let Cadet-Let Cadet Cadet ' - Let go , honeyEdmonton honey-Edmonton honey Edmonton honeyEdmontonBulletin honey -Edmonton Edmonton - EdmontonBulletin EdmontonBulletinIt ulletlD Bulletin BulletinIt It Didn't Didnt ' ' Workf'amlly WorkFamily Work WorkFamily ' Family f'amlly famlly Paper-If Paper If Paper - If not convenient convenientto to move household furniture outdoors outdoorsto to clean pi pl pllce ice a damp cloth over the thepiece thepiece thepiece piece of furniture and then beat be'lt belt ' it It ItWe . . We tried his and the , wife .ife ife . made madeus madeus madeus us come backBoston back baeh -Boston Boston - Boston E Evening EveningTranscript EveningTranscript EveningTranscriptNot . eDlng eDlngTranscript Transcript TranscriptNot Not FairBook FairBook Fair FairBook Book Camasser-What Camasser What Canvasser-What Canvasser Canvasser - What do you youthink youthink youthink think of Shell"y Shelly Shellny Shelby " ? Don't Dont ' you think he hecmplo heemplo3s heemplovs cmplo emplo3s ) s too m min 1O my metaphors ? BUhs- BUhs BUhses Bilks-Yes Bilks Yes Bilks - res es i I think thlOh he ought ou ht to toive toolve " , Ive American"oorhmen American \ " workmen \"oorhmen "oorhmen oorhmen a ch'lnce- ch'lnce chlnce cliance- cliance ch'lnceAshlnJton clianceAshington chance chanceAshlneton ' - Ashlneton AshlnJton Ashington Collieries ColherlCs Magazine 1\hgazlne 1 hgazlne Magazlne MagazlneBid \ MagazineBid Bid Below Bclow ValueYoung ValueYoung Value ValueYoung Young 'I1n-Tommy 'I1n I1n Tommy Thin-Tommy Thin ' Man - Tommy , tell me"that me \"that "that that what whatSour \ " whatyour Sour 3 our sister thinks of me and 111 IIi give giveyou giveyou giveyou you a nickelTommyAint nickelTommyAint nickel nickelTommy Tommy-Aint Tommy Aint Tommy - Aint a good laugh worth worthmore worthmore worthmore more than that-Brool that Brool that-Brooklyn that Brooklyn that7 ? ' - Brooklyn l n D'lUy DlUy Dilly D'lUyragle DillyCagle Dallyragle Dallyraglei ' ragle Cagle IThose i , Those Americans * ' How long has America Amenca been dls dis discovered discovered1"About discovered1About .oered oered covered < . , ? ' ' ' .About About "About " . 400 years 3 ears ' There 'There ' \ you ou are , and yet I read rC'ld rCld ' In Int Ini t paper about 1 1000 000 3 y ear old gl.nt glnt giant gl.nttrees gianttrees gianttrees . trees of AmerlC'l- AmerlC'l AmerlCl AmerlC'lon America-you America you America ' - 3011 on can cant t behm believe believeanything believean e e'ln anything 'ln ln ' ; thin thing these Americans Amencans sa say sav " - Leipzig Lelpzig Der Lustige Lu"tlge Lutlge Luetige " Sl1chce Snch Sach : e PROOF PROOFThe The lecturer was getting warmed warmedup warmedup warmedup up to his subject"And subject"And subject subject"And "And And " , friends , " he said ImpressIve Impressively ly , ' 'I I ' 1 ] tell tel1 you once again , medicine medicinenever medicinenever medicinenever never did lln undone anyone one any good " ' That's Thats Th'lt's Thlts ' ' ' not true , " came cnme a voice voicefrom - from the back of the hall"Not hall"Not hall hall"Not "Not Not " true ? ' echoed the lecturer Ipcturcr lecturerWhat ' What do o you mean ? ' ' ' "Medicine Medicine "Medlcme Medlcme " did my family famny a lot of ofgood ofgood ofgood good " w \ went ent on the heckler hechler . , ' ' But my friend ; , ' said s'lld slld ' the lecturer lectureryou , you have no \ way ay of proving that thatst'ltement thatstatement thaistatement st'ltement stltement statement " ' " . ' ' Oil Oh , yes I 1 have bn.e bne . , , " replied the tbe heclc heck heclcler heckler heckler ler , ' my father owns a drug store " Practically Practlcal1y Minded Manded ' Daughter D1ughter D'lughter Dlughter ' , . " said s11d her ber mother , , ' has hasthat hasthat hasthat that yoiing yonn ymrn man you ou are going with withe.er withever withever e.er eer ever . mentioned the ' subject 5ubject of mar marrlage marriage marriage rlage riage ? ' ' 'Oh Oh ' Oh iesi 3es1 es I ' ' yawned daughter , "but but "but1 but1 "butI "butl " I l told him dad chd clad " was ins 'lS lS ' so hard up he heeen heeven heeven e\en e en even ' \ couldn couldD t afford tires ( for or the car carlet , let alone a busb husbind IDd for me " Quite a Dutance Datance Distance DatanceCallerDol DistanceCallerDoes DutanceCaller Caller-Dol Caller Dol Caller-Does Does Caller - Does ' < ; your maid try to tom'lhe tomake tomake m'lhe mlhe make ' the food go as far as po po&slble poslble possible & slble ? l\l1stress-Oh l l1stress Oh Mistress-Oki Mistress Oki \ Mistress - Oh , yes ; a lot of It goes goesat goesat goesat at least le'lst lelst ' a mile-from mile from mile - - from our house bouse to tohers tohersPathfinder tohers hers hersP'lthf1nder hers-Pathfinder hers Pathfinder - Pathfinder -P'lthf1nder P'lthf1nder Plthf1nder ' Magazine Mng'1zme Mng1zme MagazineSTYLE MagazineSTYLE ' STYLE SUPERLATIVEz SUPERLATIVE z ll llI ll"lhnt I "lhnt lhnt ' " I 'l l ' hat hut author Has bas tins a most convlnc convlncing convlncing confineing ing st\ st style stIe stile \ Ie of dictIOnIt diction It " It"Y "Y Y "Yes Yes " ( > s But you ought to have heard heardthe heardthe heardthe the 'l l ' agent ent ent0 \0 0 \ " who ho sold me the set . " I IJust Just as GoodJudgeDo GoodJudgeDo Good GoodJudge Judge-Do Judge Do Judge - - Do you yon wish to have n a de de- defendmg defending defending - - I l deI del fending fendmg counsel7 counsel counsel7Accused ? ' Accused-No Accused No Accused - No , sir Slr . , but I 1 should be beI beobl1 beobliged beobliged I obl1 obliged ed to you If you could get me metwo metwo metwo two reliable reh'lble rehlble relrible ' witnesses "ItDesses ItDesses "ItDessesBerlm witnesses-Berlin witnesses Berlin " -Berlm Berlm - Berlin DIe DIeGrune DieGrune DieGrune Grune Post . PostIndirect Indirect PersuasionSlobovYour PersuasionSlovvboyYour Persuasion PersuasionSlowbov Slo\bov-Your Slo bov Your Slovvboy-Your Slovvboy Slowbov \ , - Your father Is sitting up uplate uplate uplate late tonight1lIcs tonightMips tonight tonightMi 1\lIcs 1 lIcs Mips \ Mi : < : s Willing-Yes Willing Yes Willing - Yes I think be he be"Ishes hefishes hewishes "Ishes Ishes fishes " to be on hand h1nd hind to gn give e us bls his blsblessing hisblessing hisblessing blessing - Evening vening Boston Trnn Tran Trnnscript Transcript Transcript TranscriptAn script . I An Expert Tool Tool"W ToolW ToolI . " , 11 , ell son in law , the boy talks t'llkl tllkl t'llklver talksvery ' talksver ! > I very ver \ well ( ' 11 already alre'ldv alreldv aire'idv aireidv ' ' ' I I'Yes imy-Olten imy Olten TomimyOlten Yes 'Yes ' , say S'lY SlY ' 'Good Good ' by uy . , Grandma ; , ' Tommy Tom TomOlten my myl myOtten l ' " " -Otten Otten - -Olten Olten - Woche im 1m lm Blld Bnd Bud / , . |
