Show TODAY'S TODA YS Y'S SHORT STORY I iI Fiction by Americas America's s Greatest Writers 67 ty th th 01 Track Funk A. A C OO t A VENDETTA By Charles W. W V Wood V It may sound funny to you mates as aint never had the experience butI hut but 1 I tell teU you yeLl there thero aint will nate malte a man so carelessly as a hollow hollow hollow hol hol- low gizzard there's theres no chin what Its It's liable Hable to mako malo him do I 1 I aint the only one as will tell teU you i that I Even the ancients it H an an had the highest respect for their theil cooks s. s I 1 had a old book hook of ot sea lawn an there It wa wan wa writ in there as plain as the lamps on your our face The seventh man In authority is 18 th lie tho cook cook cook-a a most necessary sary member as long longas as there will wIH be bo bellies Cut But that aint tho the first time lime I 1 it It mates males I learnt the tho lesson Ion on afore 1 I ever cr s seen that book on oti tho the th of way back in 1860 The Thin ship t I was on then was a small three masted bark barl with the name Sally Wyc 0 painted In big white letters across I her stern at an her skipper wan waa a Englisher Eng Eng- ng- ng Usher lisher by the name of Andy Small l. Ho lie was British h from tho toes of his sea boots clean up to the button on Ins IllS an nn there thero wa no holidays bali holi da lays days s 's in him neither To 10 his c eye e anybody anybody anybody any any- body as didn't look cockle an an heave to an yell Long Lon live iivo every time ho lie seen a a. British ensign fit to go so on livin 11 Although he lie didn't have no US for any nationality besides his own on the iha ones ellen ho hated worst W V J Whenever lie ho seen the rod white an nn an reen of oC a ensign his blood would boil boll They They- sa say the reason he hI was so sour our on them was because hl his wife eloped with one one- while ho lie was away off offin offin in Chiny but I dont don't know if it was as astrue true a British hool hooker r an she's I ona be ho manned by hy British subjects ho to 0 o tell the tho agents when whet ho wont for fOI crews No 0 bloomin for fot o. o mine You mates Is wondering how all aU this has lias hearings bearings on a empty stomach but you'll oun see tO later Were We're along on this thi lar day of or about a hun bun I dred an one relIes miles norm norte of ChrIstmas island As far tar as nater was concerned it no different from an any other day that neighborhood had been havin since sinco Adam woke up an missed one of or his ribs The Thc sun was hot the thc sea was blur blue an the tho trade was browin brisk but brisk but but it was the day that was celebrated aboard the Sally Wee like the Fourth of Jul July Is Ia In New Kew It Im has Kas the skipp rn ra birthday That was the lie only da lay day Small ever paid attention to outside e of English English Eng Eng- lish holidays Ever EVI since earl early eight bells that mornin Id I'd been woi like Wee likeL a t. t slave in my mr galley to get set the big biS' dinner dinner din din- ner lid read ready Id I'd a 1 big live turkey fill all the wa way down from an an with him I had all the with a a. romIn romp romp- in big to finish off with I had it in In my mind to give them pork-fed pork hearties a meal they woul wouldn't nt never get It would of done one you ou mates good to se sc see that dinner it was my ray masterpiece c. c Shortly after I pot got ot tho the turkey in the oven a sail saU pops up over tho the horizon It was in iii the same direction the wind was goin an as we was afore it it it warnton on till we could make matie her out She was a dark daik rakish craft with a three- three masted ri rig an an graceful like e a snake As she got nearer Small who was stand In ford with a a. glass begin to eye cye her suspicious V VIn In the first place sho she had hail too much of a E bend to her masts to suit his Br British c eye in the next place the lie glass ass showed him her crew was vas swarthy an an had mustaches What hat was more she was a in inclination inclination in- in to set get nearer to the Sally tI Ere says ays he handin tho the glass to the mate your our eyes is mine Take a look at that hooker an ansee ansee ansee see what you OU make cr or The rue mate put the lie glass to his eye a 3 sir says h he a bad lot too Small gave a snort Certainly Certainly Certainly says he if the they're re With that he changed the tho Sallys Sally's course so BO as to take her hel awny away from the But the also alsoc c changed her course sos so's her tack would bring her within baum distance Small cursed and chan changed ed his course again but the done the same bame thing over There no I I doubt that she bhe was tr in to speak to toU U us S. S I I The mate kept the glass to his eye rye as she sie come nearer Ho Ito seen a swarthy head come up over her hex bulwarks on which was vas a bright red bandana The rIle owner waved an sniffed in tho lie air an soon soot m moro more f fibers ers with v bandannas bandannas ban han dannas t showed to view yiew around the first I I one rhe They also their rno noses es Inthe Inthe in inthe the air an m an sniffed The mate took the tIme glass from his eye an n. n a n deep breath through his nose He Ic couldn't smell unusual ex except cx- cx x- x turkey He puts the tho glass to his eye again He didn't like the looks of or them men anyhow they reminded him unpleasant like of or of pirates I hed he'd saw for tor he was a n ci great reader of ot V pirate stories It was Vate then lie noticed with alarum as had escaped his e eye e afore It was a small black flag a at her fore foro truck When she got near ne-ar enough sos so's we wc could make out the thc crew with our naked eyes it didn't Improve their looks none Never have have- you ou mates put lamps on such a lookin bookin men V Most of ot them had red rea bandannas on on big rings in their cars an their mouths was all s set st t Grim crim like persons as had In their minds H an an was to accomplish it by fair menus means or foul There one of oC them as Captain Kid wouldn't have mistook for a a. 1 twin brother The strangest thins thInK about them however how how- ever Ol was tho the wa way they kept Sniff sniff sniff they ROCS goes with their noses In hi the air like so many dogs dog r I all right says saya Capon Small I There also pirates says the mate Pirates Pirate the skipper I scornful as he snatches matchell the glass class s from I I the mates mate's hand z rl crazy hats that's vot ot Who Vho care ever eve u-o u of or pirates these days They look took like lIko vIctors Ive I've saw says saya the tho mate An J besides at er or wot's that black flag finS truck 7 Small Jumped violent an an clapped tho the glass to his eye The They might be pirates or the they might not but what he did know was that there no likelier place in lie tho Pacific for fOI the So Sally Sali 11 to be he robbed an tn an sun sunk stink Ono One hundred and one miles Christmas island was lonely enough to suit tho the most pem pirate ever boi born n. n Ho lie walled waited till the tho t a was most In distance to give the tho mato a a. to make sure for he mowed ho was a authority on that letIs let is 18 them like Jlko tho the h ho ass Them is pirates sit sir I answers tho lie mate mate- Just JUit then tho the skipper of the barka- barka tine tino picked up n. n megaphone an bawled at us in a foren When hed he'd finished he ho put tho time megaphone to his nose pointed it at Sallys Sally's galley sae an took tool long inhales Did an any of you men that hat ast tho skipper of us We You mates 1 know why As At Small stood n the undecided hn lie seen a boat away away loaded down with a a. bunch of them It looked hooked like they hey was waa au going to 10 try to board us its The Tho skipper didn't walt wait to tomake tomake tomake make sure Mure of it H neither your sl sky sis an break out your studding ho lie roars roar to the tim hands Pirates ch cli Ill I'll show the bloomin cut lUt throats how a n. man travels Wo Yo stuck up them sails like hike our lives es depended on it It ant only faster an slid away from that boat bont Just as one of the lie pirates was out his hiM hand to grab srab the tim Sall Sallys Sally's s lanyards Small put her dead afore aror tho the wind ind an with them studs a n. draw in wo we begin beJin to put lUt some water that an us us durin which as sounded like Uko cUI curses es come como through tho the mega- mega I I I I I I I I But pirates aint so easy to get away from Crom as you mates think We Vc w wasn't moron three miles from Crom that afore wo seen every piece of Canvas I. go JO up on her an her hermain hermain hermain main an nn mizzen booms swings s out on each side wIn wing an wing winS She points down the lie wind an conies comes after us like a a eagle agle after a a. sparrow Whet When Small been that thero no doubt left heft to his mind If lf a a. ship aint a. a i pirate te as flies lies a L black flag an keeps cha you OU when you rou dont don't want to do with her then themi what I In is she Bhe 4 Awny r we goes a across the Pacific with o e every mast masl a o cr every rope rop a 1 every sail a abu bu bustin full an aim an that thai graceful pirate t like hike a bloodhound bloodhound an an gamin Tho The dinner was forgot now V So I took it the oven an lt d dil il it to one no side sido I was waa too good a n. cook to let that dinner burn burl u up even if it was bound for gizzards Lon Long about noon the tho was only about a mile away She was a bigger snip mlp than the Sally Sally Sal Sal- ly an an a faster taster saUer an an that mile was gottin shorter Small still sun stood on tho time quarter quarter quarter ter like hike the gallant Englisher he lie was out orders in a hoarse voice Two hours later when the was only onty ten yards an still still he ho called all hands aft an an give I Ius us a speech White While he was doln doin It the tim pirate Irate was in his bow a yellin at us through a megaphone but Small didn't Intend to get set caught b by no trick Men says he hc In a loud voice weve made a a. gallant run of hit but them blighted ruffians is gamin with every puff putt Hit wont won't be bo long afore we o ave to light fight an an although I never yet seen a a. bloomin I couldn't lick in a fair fight this may rimy be bo a login bosin one because we wo ave no weapons But Butwell Butwell Butwell well we'll die tig wit wot weapons we weave ave ave ae an pins an do hit like good British should should But Butt he as ns I ham the tho I should stick to my ship till tin the last man is go gone e for wot vot g good od is a ship without no So when the fight- fight in starts I will go so up the mast an nn his- his m my commands from there till un the tho I last man mall is dead hafter hatter which I will come come- down an an die dlo halso Vo We grips our weapons an give three thre nn jm cheers for tor the thc It was good to lo know we had such a man to command com corn mand us But Capa Small wasn't caught yettie yet t. t He tie waited till the was almost the tho Sallys Sally's stern post then lien he suddenly throw d the tho wheel hard over o Moro More curses went up as aJ she swept S b by mi us by a small yard So wo we went dodgin again atm an again like two bO boys 6 tag an that bark bark- atino aUno a a. us every time You mates aint got no Idee ideo of ot the tho I miles mUes and miles wo we covered like this till at last one time when she was sas r up to us uS' um one ono of ot them I unexpected let heave a I It come so near the skipper it took ot off his cap P. but slid down an took holt bolt of a n. scupper scupper an an we was wa caught at atla last t. t I Them didn't waste no time gettin aboard l They hey was ns over the In a a. I an an then comes tho the queerest up mix-up you OU mates ever heerd of ot To our surprise they didn't have hac no more weapons than we did did pins pins an an capstan-bars capstan an an although they ther was they was the weakest pirates I ever seen They rhey falls taUs a right an an left leCt an an u ua us only a tappin t. with our OUI pins an bars They was easy two to our one but hut it wasn't long tong afore aCore there was only uny six 61 left stand In upright But them six was makin for tor the galley I sprung to tho gangway an an tackled them thorn six o with my single hands Inch by Inch I backs bachs up a n knockin a a- swarthy out now an an again with my bare fist tin till final there thero aint only one one left leCt He was waN the I 1 Iv a leap an an comes down on him I with my hands handa to his neck where I pressed his Adams Adam's apple UPIlo clean sight But hi he I couldn't stand that so when lie he chokes choke out min as I I ed cd like I 1 give up tip in I let U Uan up an an sits on his chest He Tie begin Dont you OU speak no English 7 I lasts b beet t says lieThen he lie Then listen HElten to this says I. I You is a disgrace to the trade Pirate Mo no pirate says he lie weary lIl like c. c But wo we hava ha no more provIa provis pro- pro vIa vis Macaroni vermicelli cans empty not not oven a scrap L the garlic left Oh sada da day For Fox five long longa da day we no cat eat I I quick jumped or oft off his chest We Ve see seea you jou O an an tra to speak but speak but you run alia aUa the time run Wo We amelia emella dinner an an geta Is It to hang hans with a fulla tulla the stomach than die longa with a a. empty one V Small had come along alonS' while h ho was waa Wot n oils ells the black flag for tor then them 7 he lie Flaga Oh the Oh-the the cat he die The cat asa has beena on the Lauria for fon bongo longa years Oh sada da day times lines he go witha me from Naples to Hong Hong-a- r Konga Konga an an now he falla Into th the empty barrel an an ina ma the time brine We Ve him up ina isa flaga a an ansha s ha him tho the fina sea-burial sea like o the good sailor he was We Ve the time block black flaga laga to giva gh him the honor Oh sa sada a aday day daylie day day- He lie wiped some tears his eye eC with the end of ot his mustache Small was visible affected Bring out that dinner sa says s 's he turnIng to me I I 1 It out while the tIme rest of or the time hands begin bucket of ot sea sea- water on tho the fainted Although they'd give ua us a hot hol chasan chase chas an a good fight for fight for empty the lie most thing thinS they thoy done llono that day was tho tim wa way thc they goes after that dinner There a speck of oC meat left on them turkey bon bones an nn two of oC i them c come m near havin a it dool over o the neck Away went my masterpiece into the emptiest gizzards as ns ever e como come from Italy Vial Val that's the tho yarn about empty stomachs an an Ill I'll bet a bI big bg tul of ot there ther aint none ot of you ou mates can tell a a. better belle one cone I |