Show THE SAYINGS OF OF MRS SOLOMON The prayer of ot an apartment house dweller which is Mrs Irs Solomons Solomon's Oh Landlord be merciful unto me a tenant tenant tenant ten ten- ant I For lo 10 I have chosen thee out of ot the multitude that did besiege me mo with fair fall promises in m the summer season Yet now in the winter of my discontent dis dis- dis content I wonder at my simplicity For Tor why should I move each autumn autumn autumn aut aut- only to discover new places and new ways In which to suffer Go to Hath not a tenant hands feet eyes ears blood dimensions senses Is not a tenant startled b by the same sounds shocked by the same sights warmed by the same sun and frozen by the same steam pipes as as a human being I Alas wherein have I of offended tended thee that thou a deaf ear to my pleadings and me with false promises and day after tomorrows and were so BO busies and we cant can't help its I Verily verily upon six days of ot the week eek thou dost turn off the water and deny me steam heat But upon the Sabbath when the theMEN MEN At home my radiator hum meth merrily from dawn to sunset and and i my hot water pipes are running over For thus are the husbands of the house confounded and each of them his wife and her CRANK saying What the deuce is the matter with THIS place Its It's good enough for tor me I Yea what more thou desire than j the comfort which He thine eighty eighty- I j seventh landlord in Babylon upon thee I And straightway he a check cheek for the rent and cannot be persuaded Alas alas there is no hope for me I For POl If I move into a new house and andI I the plaster ant anal falleth upon mine head I shall be required to pay for the damage to the floor I But If I move more into an old house and the plumbing upon the floor then am I required to pa pay indemnity for the damage to the ceiling beneath Behold I 1 have hae stood beside an icy cy I radiator at 10 a. a m m. m and have cal called ed out in agony agon but the Janitor would not notI hear hel me I I have bowed down before the halli hall hall- i boys and tempted them with tips and lintl I I hum burnt offerings but they have only i mocked me with their ha hahs and andI I answered my calls according to their boyish fancy I have let m my curses fall upon the I switchboard operator but she flipped I i her knitting needles It is in my face cry- cry ing r Well Vell Well ALL the wires are busy I didn't invent enl the till switchboard neither I the telephone R system stem DID I j I And lo 10 T i that was known In the land for my sweetness of ot disposition and I m my trusting nature have become a ai at i t pessimist anti and a kicker I Verily YerBy verily I am alone in nt my trio trio- nn and there Is no help for tor nie me I j I I For who am I that I should expect mercy from kings and landlords a and d I kaisers and Janitors and emperors Yet so long have I J suffered from cold feet reet and freezing finger tips tIIS that I when I die I pray theo then do not let them Ila lay mo me in the Ic icy earth carth but send me meI I unto a crematory where I shall shaH at last be WARM VAR VARand and cozy cozy- coz and quiet Selah I Copyright 1918 1913 by br the Pi Press ess Publishing Co the New lew York Evening World |