Show I I THE NEWS k 1 By Arthur It Bugs Baer Boer Copyright 1917 by The Pi Press ess Publishing Co The New York Evening World Delinquent shipbuilding c commission has the right Idea U-boats U cant can't sink sinka a proposed fleet America will make the world safe for Democracy Chaunc Chauncey y Depew wants em to make it safe for us Republicans too Mail Mall order doctor in Connecticut pinched Had a new way of or curing toothache by parcel post Rub Hub the afflicted tooth with magical potion and it it- it drives the pain up into the patients patient's hat Tale Takeoff off your hat and youre you're cured Germ laden monkey absconded from inoculation laboratory carrying carrying germs with hi him He will be charged with abduction and Boats of the H Hamburg American and North German Lloyd will resume their schedule Passenger accommodations can be secured on boats by enlisting in the U. U S. S army or marine corps Good eats and a ch chance nce to see Berlin The Red Cross Is making almost as much headway here as the Double Cross Is In Russia St St. Paul has a recruit with fourteen bullet wounds wounds in his system A guy that well ventilated doesn't have ha t to sleep with the w window open King Ex-King Constantine Constantino Is in Switzerland Sending coals to to Newcastle and cheeses to Switzerland Three e kings ex-kings are now in Switzerland Those birds had better cou cour com f their mou mountains Allies complain there is too much fraternizing In Russia Nick Nicle Romanoff cant can't see It ft S Correspondence regiment st started by Scranton student includes a massed postcard attack on the Kaiser Cautious Minnesota 1 man enlists in the submarine chasing department f r service his in own state X N Price of eggs depends on whether you rou want them for omelets or good eggs eggs Ghost of Mark 1 Twain is writing a novel That's the kind of folks the thep the the- p publishers like to pay royalties to British government refuses to buy fifty million pounds of trapped and senile poultry and nd we will have to eat t it ourselves Thought those Britons were our allies ames Wise Germans warned the Kaiser not to to get us m mad d. d but but the advice went in one ear car and out the other Nothing there to stop it it The European Europea situation wont won't IO look so bad over the top of a sU slice e of New Jersey watermelon Czar has fallen Consta Constantine Constantino ha has has' fallen en K Kaiser aint fallen yet but hut hes he's j almost ripe Overcrowding in street cars Is fierce When there ar are only a hundred hundred people in each car they all aU feel like her hermits its Ten thousand more more A Armenians massacred Returns of the Sultans Sultan's election still keep keen coming in tn Slacker claims that g going ln to war war aint sanitary Thoughtful judge used his influence and slacker will now nw breathe J e antiseptic air filtered tilt r d a a. medicated set of bars bara |