Show THEN TIlEY NEVER To TOM M SIMS BEGIN HERE TODAY PLEASE Mr and Mrs were sitting at home playing bridge one night when Mr caught what he thought was a u. perfect hand Ho lie had 13 spades So he bid no trumps excepting to start star start In and lead end the spades for 13 times The other side raised his bid so he went to five no trumps Then the catastrophe happened Since he had nothing but spades and the b bid c was no no trumps he could not get the lead He lost every trick and Ms iris wife divorced him This however has nothing to do with the present story Jimson Wood marries Pearl Handle The two have met before They live In Ohio So they start on their hon honey honey- y- y moon moon During the past 16 chapters Pearls Pearl's father has shot at nine times So holds very little affection for tor the old oUI man Another Another An An Another other character is Js Detective Gum Gum- shoe Still another character Is Mrs Gumshoe AL ALL RIGHT READ ON CHAPTER It If you ou are as s constant a r reader as is you should be you'll remember the conclusion o of the J last Jast st Installment installment Install install- r ment of this gre great t novel which is r t 3 attracting attention far and i wide S especially far and Pearly had eaten a abIg bIg lg breakfast In a Chicago hotel Then they visited the stockyards 71 made such a hog of himself S Sat at at breakfast he was started toward the slaughter pen In n tie the stockyards yelled the roughneck atour at atour atour our yelled he as the rush of or hogs pushed the young millionaire along with the common swine The other hogs frogs were grunting and snorting the their Ir way up a long chute r As they arrived upon a platform a Z follow fellow silt their throats with a sharp 1 knife or knocked them In the head or did whatever It Is they do V to o hogs logs in the stockyards Get along there said the roughneck roughneck rough rough- neck kicking in the seat of Ms rIs trous trousers rs turned and glared at the fellow ellow Oh exclaimed the rough rough- L neck That hog gave gave me such a a. dirty look I must go and wash my face ace I cant can't stand this dirty look lookhe lookhe lookhe he gave me I So the fellow rushed away to wash I. I his face Our Pearl was standing nearby 1 Seeing the fellow go a away way to wash I. I off the dirty look our had hadt given him Pearl was moved to immediate Immediate immedIate Im im- t mediate action It was a crisis She knew It Pearl knew a crisis was caused by someone some some- someone lone one falling failing to act quickly She roseto rose roseto to the occasion Stooping down behind a barrel the ho blushing young bride jerked off her well known synthetic corset exclaimed she Don this quickly I donned the dern Bern thing He was Just In time When the fellow came back there stood with his ils middle squeezed in Hello said the fellow You look like a sausage I am a sausage laughed Where do you keep yoUr sausages The rhe fellow showed a long building Run down there said le he e pointing his bloody finger rInger Run Rundown Rundown down lown there and tell teU them to put you youn in n a box with the tiro other sausages So ran down there But he walked calked out a side gate removed J Pearls Pearl's corset and was free once t more Happy after the dreadful experience experience ence at the stockyards and Pearl sallied forth to to see the city of Chicago I They liked the town Pearl espe- espe wanted to settle settIe down and live Ive there She knew of no no other city where she she could walk the streets in ler her nightie and not be noticed And the lovely young girl was walking the streets In nightie When When- she and leaped from he the the train window she had on only her nightie and the article of wearing wearing wear- wear ing ng apparel which used In inthe he the stockyards to disguise himself as asa asa a sausa sausage e. e Now Kow that this garment was gone her nightie alone remained But that hat was all rig right t. t She was In Chi CIrI cago ago The sidewalk dewalk felt warm to her toes oes Gay pink ribbons fluttered from the garment she wore Sire caught her fond husband by the theland theo o hand land and skipped lightly down the street i i Even this attracted little atteno attention attention atten atten- o tion except from a group group of children children children child child- ren on on their way from school They thought bought our Pearl was a fairy and admired her very much Where shall shaIl we ve go asked trying to keep upI upI upI up I must do some shopping said Pearly When We the leave Chica Chicago Chicago Chi Chi- ca cago o Ill I'll need some clothes Painful as it was the young husband husband hus- hus band and band consented to escort his bride upon her shopping expedition Well Yell go to Marshall Fields first said Pearl Then I want to drop by jy Sears-Roebuck Sears and get a catalog catalog cata- cata log og to send to mother How is IR the old oyster laughed Jimm He usually referred to her heras heras heras as oyster because she was the mother of Pearl tine fine fine fine- said Pearl I hart a aletter letter etter from her She said she wished father would hurry up and shoot you She needs him around home Is that so asked Indig Indig- nant Yes said Pearl Ignoring her husbands husband's attitude Father Is very handy landy about the house Mother carries carries carries car car- ries on an extensive correspondence Father ather usually sits around with his tongue out so she can moisten her stamps Js is that so was the only re response response response re- re her husband made Pearl Peirl continued her Idle chatter Mother smokes quite a bit She strikes her matches on fathers father's whIskers So you see he really I is s miss missed d. d I Arriving at State street they paused to let Jet the traffic pass I Taxi called a driver pulling I his machine t over ver to the tire curb I How far tar is it if to Marshall 1 Fields Fields' asked C Let Lek me see now now said sold the tho taxi i driver We Ve are on State and Madi- Madi C son on Its It's about nine miles C So they got goot Into the taxi Six C hours later they arrived across the street treet at Marshall Fields Nh Night ht found them back at their C hotel The shopping expedition n had C been a n long one and tedious It was without adventure to Jimy Jim- Jim ry y except once when a a. woman winY win- win Y Y t r ry y f e g 1 y A Aj j f 9 4 y Ii tp y Y Y b p. p 1 ts Pd 4 I d I hy Y acv I II r 4 is isI I big slob I 11 screamed l am a am Pearl Photo shows only square rolling pin jn in existence dow dresser mistook him for a n dummy dummy dummy dum dum- my and started unbuttoning Pearl was worn out Being already al already al ready dressed f for r bed she hopped under the covers even though more r robust bust thun tiran his Delicate delicate delicato wife was slightly fatigued himself himself He Ha read a awhile then slipped into his blue baby blue pa paJamas pajamas pa pa- jamas lamas and Jumped into bed No Xo robbers knocked at their door The word had been passed that robbing was to be done by the waiter But about midnight slumber slumber slumber slum slum- ber was Interrupted by Pearl Quit snoring said his darling as she kicked him In the ribs I wasn't snoring rebuked You were so snapped Pearl sitting sitting sit sit- sitting ting up in bed and y yanking the tire cover cover off oft You snore all the time I do do not snore Ill I'll bet you ou an anything any any- thing I dont don't snore You cant can't prove you dont don't You know snow you cant I can prove It too And I will How you ou going to prove it GoIng Going Going Go- Go Ing to stay awake vake and see No o shouted crawling out of or bed He lIe slipped on his mules and left the room Pearl heard him catch the elevator He returned In a few minutes carrying carrying car car- carrying a dictaphone This he put by bythe bythe the side of the bed and turned on I Tomorrow morning will tell whether I snore or or not said Ire he turning over and going to Morning came as mornings will P Pearl arl was up bright and early She started the dictaphone The noise It made was deafening Now ow said Pearl are you satisfied satisfied satisfied satis satis- fied That isn't my sn snoring That's Thal's thunder There was a storm during the night replied the the husband It is your our snoring laughed th the wife Just listen at it it will you ou That's what I have to hear mar all night But the snoring wasn't all A voice came out of ot the dictaphone apparently voice Mrs Gumshoe said the voice I love you 1 I think Pearl is a big fat slob I love you Mrs Gumshoe v Pearls Pearl's screams could be heard far and wide Talking about Mrs Gum in your sleep were you 1 yelled she sat up in bed He was I aghast ghast He was vas speechless pe h So So he he said nothing Im a big slob am I 11 screamed Pearl Ill so go home go-home homo home to father Come Pearl said her father tather hopping out ot of ofa a clothes closet closet Come with me and leave that vii vile human And Just th n the chapter ended To be lIe continued |