Show THE WIDOW SHEARS SHEAR I AND ALL SHE HEARS V X N V VA A Chicago man who wio lives s in Goethe street g gets ts off the car at Schiller SchUler street two blocks way away because no conductor can understand his pronunciation on of Goethe I 1 had pra practiced tl ed on the pronunciation pronunciation pronunciation for a week weel he says and I had the sound of the umlaut down fine I sprung It It on the conductor the first evening He looked at me blankly an l replied Huh I I repeated jt it ov over r o once c cor or or twice and finally a g gt great f roke over him Oh y st you ine in mean ri Go th Why didn't you s sa say so Th The next eft even evening veni ing the conductor called It Go Go-celli The third time it was ws Go e Then Then rhen there was a raw n in charge harge Of one of the trains train's who spoke of it as Go tay Go-tay tay with the accept accent on the last syllables morning I left an order for ln my wife Wife- t ati the M grocers grocer's grocers grocer's He looked at t me ne In silence l nt for a moment after I I had given our o ad dress Oh yes he said you mean Gertie Ger Gei- tie street The butcher calls It Galtie the pronounces it Ga Gay tuTi and the man man who delivers coa coal alludes to it as a's Goth street I have a woman vom n friend Vh who prides l herself on her culture who ho speaks f feelingly of Gutt Gutter r str street et But the devoted thoroughfare doe doesn't n t really get set it It In the neck until you hear the Janitor talk He calls It Goi Goi- tre New tre-Nev New York TrIbune Tribune In parsing a sentence aloUd the other day according to a contemporary a small girl came cam acrO across s th the word smokIng smoking smoking ing used as a 3 noun She instantly de de- scribed Its gender as common and defended defended de de- de fended herself by stating that it could not be masculine or feminine because her mother smoked Just just justas as much as her father She did not however give her family y awa away quite as completely as did that other small child who once informed informed in in formed a that her father was vaul the bearded woman at a show show- L' L London Globe e. e The policy of the tle majority in the Senat Senate Senate Sen Sen- at ate which tenders tenders' the tenders the Filipinos a quarter ter loaf when onlY half a loaf ot tariff relief is asked for foi- fot is is' to keep them In subjection exactly as George III HI tried to keep keer the American colonists Sn in n sub sub- It throws a it l shameful side light upon the tIle sordid unworthy motives which control th the present plesent Philippine policy Philadelphia Times Ind Dem There Ther is no any reason hY why an Inte intelligent and nd successful citizen should want to b become come a member of Congress in the lower 10 house Unless he be a man manof manof I of conspicuous and arid unusual ability and i can assume assum a position of or leadership at at the start he 3 li un unable to accomplish any anything thing in Congress and is little better than an automatic voting machine Controlled con Con- trolled and manipulated by party boss boss- es Toledo S.-Toledo Toledo Bee Dem Dens French French has hils been made the official language lan Jan guage of t the c Quebec c Legislature CIt City t Board hoard and of Trade English English- speaking members rs will be le e allowed t to use their own lan language of course but all the records are are areto to be kept in French The change change ls Is due to the growth of the Fr French ele element ept In n the three bodies named Full FuU n many Ln a ge gi l o Of the pur purest st ra ray serene and dark l unfathomed fathomed caves Cl of ocean bear because no giant sort of ge machine has yet has yet been dipped by Pierpont 1 th thi-e thi le Baltimore American r I i i t |