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Show Kathleen Norris Says: Wife May Be Cause of Tightwad Husband Bell Syndicate WNV Fiituro, My husband grudgei me spending money, criticizes my buying of clothes, and makes terrible scenes at the first of every month when the bills come in. By KATHLEEN NORRIS KATHRYN says she has a tightwad husband. She sends me seven scribbled pages on heavily monogrammed paper, to explain ex-plain to me exactly how penurious penu-rious Geoff is. She says he has Scotch ancestry and she thinks that explains a good deal. "When we were married I did my best on practically no money at all," writes Kath-ryn, Kath-ryn, "and Geoff often says that those were among the happiest days of his life. He then gave me $10 a week tor table expenses and my own pocket money, mon-ey, and though I had not had much experience In keeping house I got on very well. By the time ur daughter, Patricia, now 11 years old, was born, things were easier, and for the last five or six years we have had a nice home, two good servants, and my household expenses ex-penses must run sometimes between one hundred and fifty dollars a month; I have a fine maid, and as much extra assistance as I like; in short, we are a typical American small-town prosperous family. I belong be-long to the Woman's Club and the Music Society, and we are both active ac-tive In Country Club amusements. Also, may I say, Geoff is in contributory con-tributory defense work and I am vice president of the Red Cross. "But my husband grudges me spending money, criticizes my buying buy-ing of clothes, and makes terrible scenes at the first of every month when the bills come in. Pat is naturally nat-urally at an expensive age, when j schooling, gym, dentist all cost money; there is scarcely a week COST OF LIVING The cost of living isn't going down, you know, and it may go up and up if you don't think twice before you spend your money. The money you spent today for that extra pair of shoes ("just in case," you told yourself) may make the difference differ-ence between a balanced budget bud-get and one of those tearful scenes in which you protest that you didn't buy a single thing you could have gotten along without. Are you sure? You may have needed everything every-thing you bought, but that doesn't mean that you had to buy it. And if you do keep within your budget, why not put the extra money into something some-thing really worth while? Buy war bonds and stamps! and more than that, I have no money, and Geoff and my brother support my mother and have for years. Ours is a very happy and harmonious household, except for this one subject, which unfortunately unfortu-nately comes up about the first of every month. Can you advise me as to some way of persuading, him that a woman of 33 does not like to be treated like an irresponsible child!" Irresponsible in Money Matters. It all depends, my dear Kathryn, upon the question as to whether the woman of 35 really is or is not an Irresponsible child. Most husbands in these days are proud to trust their wives with their financial responsibilities, re-sponsibilities, and proud to boast of their wives' thriftiness, and good wives rejoice in their ability to keep well within the household when a child that age does not need some new garment, or else it is a tennis racquet, ski shoes, skates. Rages Over Bills. "Geoff this morning raged about the telephone bill, which was large last month because my mother is sick in a hospital in a town 400 miles away and I have frequently called her, feeling that this is cheaper cheap-er by far than going ,to see her. He also raved over the florist's bill, my shoe bill, and the grocer's bill. These last items were large because In both cases I had attended sales, feeling that we may be glad someday some-day to have a good deal of canned stuff In the bouse and I will now not need shoes for at least two years. "What especially angers me is that I have discovered through a friend, whose husband told her, that Geoff is making extra money these days, money of which he has said nothing to me. When we were married mar-ried we talked things over honestly, and promised always to be frank with each other, and In those days we would pool our money together, and make plans. Now he gives me $25 a month pocket money, and by the last week of the month I can assure you that I am often embarrassed em-barrassed before my friends for taxifares, lunch money, tips, telegrams, tele-grams, the purchase of bridge prizes or the thousand other trifles that women need. Some years ago, and again last year, be threatened to stop my credit at the shops 'tt I did not buy less, and rather than risk that I don't know what I wouldn't do! "After this, you will perhaps be surprised that I don't leave him, and think of us as a quarrelsome and 'unhappy couple. But sucb is not the case. I am proud of Geoff, I never think of any life away from bim, Pat is devoted to her father. budget and still take good care ol the family. Kathryn is evidently entirely unacquainted un-acquainted with the budget. My advice to her is to meet it Let her take a pencil and paper this very night and write down, with Geoff's help, exactly what her expenditures every month OUGHT to be. Rent on an income of $5,000 a year ought to be well under a hundred; food, including milk and ice, another hundred, hun-dred, and so on. These figures could be cut in half without leaving the Browns homeless and starving. Then let Geoff add his inescapable expenses; taxes, insurance, valet service, transportation, car maintenance, mainte-nance, lunches, club dues. These with telephone, light, gas, cooking and furnace fuel, outdoor man once a week and Annie's wages will come to a sum that will amaze Kathryn. She will say in consternation, "but then the doctor and the dentist and flowers and symphony seats and church and what you send Mother all have to come out of less than a hundred!" Patriotic to Cat Down Expenses. Poor, on five thousand a yearl But Kathryn still has a lot to learn. Personally, I can't blame a husband hus-band who refuses to trust a woman who isn't sure within $50 what her grocery bill is, and who buys everything every-thing she needs or fancies, just when she sees it, with no reference at all to the state of the family bank account It is a very serious patriotic duty for every wife now to keep her man and herself from worrying, by cutting cut-ting . down expenses, by living in cheaper quarters, dispensing with kitchen help, impressing her friends rather with the money she doesn't spend than the money she does. Make that first-ofthe-month-bill-crisis a time of pleasant surprises rather than angry consternation. |