Show GAMBLING OBSESSION OBSESs oN THWARTS HAPPINESS HAPPINESS' t. t i. i IN lN WIFE'S DEMESNE t B By BETTY BElTY BLAIR Y The cure for gambling rests in the higher emotional v values lues c coupled with activity that one is able to s substitute tc for it Religion Religion Re Re- ligion adv adventure art finance pol politics tics are some of e i activities with their resultant emot emotions ons to which which men have s successfully transferred th their ir love for gambling Dear Miss Blair BIaIr You have havo been BO so helpful to others other X I thought I would you about my any y problem My husband is 15 a very cry industrious and In Intelligent Intelligent Intelligent In- In man roan very kind and gentle Is la Ideal as aa a husband nd In g c general This Is la lathe r the problem Be Re Behas Rec has a terrible weakness weak weak- c ness neM tor for playing pl cards in the cheap operated bout about town to I have been a as a. im tolerant and ond patient r as a. a I could possibly be We dont don't quarrel quarrel rel ret over the tha situation situa tion but it humiliates ate atC and hurts me mo so much I can hardly control m myself What would you Fou OU do Please give gl mo me an idea concerning concerning con con- Corning what to do as I have tried everything e within m my power Will you ou please print the song The Gamblers Gambler's Gain Gam bIers bler's Wife VUe I appreciate your colUmn column col col- col- col tuna very much WONDERING I hope lope you l listened to the Hearts Heart's Haven radio program Wednesday at 15 p. p m. m over WonderIng Wonder Vonder drama had to do l Ing hig g for lor our little mUe with the gambling problem and though a different situation from your Jour own may have shed some light lighton on your question The thrill of playing and winning winning win win- ning of getting something many times the value of or the stakes played comes to be as much an obsession as the drug habit or alcoholism As a rule gamblers are people who have not reached a mature level of oC emotional development They still sUIl get the same thrill out of playing an and winning that they had when they played marbles for lor keeps In mature years they substituted cards but the emotional quality was no nomore nomore nomore more mature They have never substituted higher planes of the emotional thrill in their lives The man with the gambling spirit instilled in his early makeup needs to get out and play the high finance game the political game where men win at odds the reU religious ious game where men pIa play for lor the souls of men allen or for lor their own souls Witness in the latter the activities of Billy Sunday who was able to transfer his emotion for drink and gambling to the religious game The field of art of or exploration welfare work are avenues into which mens men's energies energies ener ener- gies have been turned and to which they have havo been reclaimed from front less mature and less worthy emotional planes In what direction does your husbands husband's husbands husband's husbands husband's hus hus- bands band's interests lie other than in being a good husband and in card playing You may have to probe deep to find this interest It may have been inhibited and his real self frustrated so far back he be has himself himsel almost forgotten But a good mental hygiene director perhaps perhaps per per- haps you yourself could find the place in his emotional life lifo when he took up card playing as a substitute l for r something else he might have been and done but for lack of opportunity opportunity opportunity op op- op- op to do so Whatever It may be be there must be he an Inner emotion connected with it it H. and the opportunity to do something something something some some- thing about it that will have continuous continuous continuous con con- and accelerating interest All the preaching all the advice all the hoping in the world will be of no avail unless something is actually actually actually actu actu- ally done to give your husband an J letters Lettera questions and requests for advice Dd should be addressed to 16 MISS l BETTY BLAIR HEARTS HA RAVEN HAVEN VEN THE TELEGRAM SALT LAKE CITY Write rito legibly upon only ono one sl 51 lo 0 of tho the p paper per It lt is 15 necessary that hat you ou append tho the right name namo and address but butth th these se will vill be held In strict t confidence confidence dence and will not appear in print Questions nl Involving advertising information cannot bo answered d. d t t I opportunity to transfer his emotion and his activities Into some route that has in it a soul-satisfying soul content content con con- tent Thousands of men have havo found themselves transferred into useful channels by the dis discovery overy of a substitute substitute substitute sub sub- emotion and activity for fel their energies Thousands st still sill nou flounder cr 1 in the grip o of devitalizing emotional activity because of a lack lackor of or something g better betler to do We Ve sincerely sincerely sin sin- hope the substitute may be found found- for so good a man a as y y your r husband Is Hearts Heart's Haven has never printed songs or poems and we wo may not do doso doso so now INTRODUCING TITLES Dear Miss Blair When introducing a surgeon and hi his hb wife wire also a dentist and his wife to a small group should they be presented present d as as Dr and Mrs or what Is the proper introduction Thanking you ou kindly OTTA OITA When possible and it should be possible in a small group make your Introductions individually Do Donot Donot Donot not say Mrs Brown may I present present present pre pre- sent Dr and Mrs Smith Say instead Mrs Smith Mrs Brown and may I present Dr Brown 1 The dentist is also introduced with the title of doctor and he and his wife an are are pres presented in the same way Two women are introduced to each other first the tho men are then presented pre presented pre pre- to the tho women individually and then the men to each other The men shake hands but as a arule arule arule rule the women do not notTO TO INVITE BOY Dear Miss Blair Some time ago I wrote you about a n certain boy with whom I I had previously previously gone pone who doesn't speak to me mo any more when he meets me Inc on the street It now happens happeD that my two girl friends and I are arc planning on giving A n party patty My brother who is older than I. I is 15 invited to to- the party but refuses to come unless we invite this particular boy My broth brother r and he are very good good- friends 1 Do you you think I should boy Thank you A FRIEND Let one one of the other girls invite the boy if it you O feel distressed about doing so Either that or leave him uninvited and let your brother abide by the result as he wishes If it would make you jOU unhappy to have havethe havethe havethe the boy come to the tho party your feelings as hostess should be con con- After all your brother Is Isan Isan Isan an invited guest He isn't giving the party and is presuming to dictate dictate dic die tate who shall or shall not be in in- in It is his privilege to accept acceptor or refuse the invitation as he wishes However if you would really like to have the boy come and his coming coming corning com corn ing provides an opportunity to clear up a misunderstanding the reason of which causes him to evade you by all means see to it that he has an invitation whether you give if it yourself or not TREATMENT TREAT FOR GRAY HAIR HAm Dear Miss Blair I am a young woman too young to tobe tobe tobe be finding gray gra hairs multiplying rapIdly rapidly rap rap- idly among the brown What shall I Ido Ido Ido do about them WORRIED Probably nothing gives a woman so o many gray hairs as the gray haIrs lairs she already has She worries about that sprinkling of the gray among the gold as a symbol of encroaching encroaching en en- old ld age until she is thoroughly thoroughly thoroughly thor thor- gray There are only two sane attitudes to o t take ke on this problem One is to tobe tobe tobe be philosophical about it and let nature take its course without regrets re- re grets the other is to take them in inland hand land early in the game and let letour your our beauty specialist rejuvenate your hair with a shampoo oll before anybody becomes aware of the occasional gray strands |