| Show Walter Winchell BROADWAY R R 0 A D 11 A Y G GOSSIP 0 S SIP Complaint Oh you ou could never doubt my faithfulness Or question at my frame of Jf mind or heart hearL But time lime is hard to bear I must confess With only memory for counter counter- part parL Oh it was not so ea easy w to endure A love Jove that wandered far be beyond beyond beyond be- be yond my hand And yet on each returning could be sure I would be waiting walling quick to understand My Mr little words that should have reached your our ear Were Vere lost bewildered on the theair theair air instead Because for distance you Ou could never hear And I am young and small words must be said They cry for life while you but dig diga a grave And years arc such a long time lime timeto to be brave Maybelle Howard Governor of New Jersey Jersey Jer Jer- sey ey was the youngest captain in the A. A E. E F. F to hear Earl Conway of or Jersey Cit City argue it HoHman's Hoffman's Hoffmans Hoffmans Hoffman's Hoff HoH- mans man's personality registered with everybody and he was immensely popular with the lads One day it appears appear a dress parade was to be held in Captain Captain Cap Cap- tam tain Hoffmans Hoffman's company Ho He announced announced announced an an- it via the bulletin board and directed th that t the men govern themselves accordingly A wisecracker among hmong them wrote under the orders Yeah and a little child shall lead them Instead of or being sore Hoffman HoHman wrote under it H Yeah And on a damn big horse At a recent gathering of litree people a discussion came up as asto asto asto to which was as the most popular form of or It was de decided decided de- de that biography and autobiography autobiography autobiography auto auto- biography enjoy the widest favor One of or the younger writers turned to a vet near him Of the two he said which do you prefer prefer biography biography or autobiography autobiography autobiography auto auto- biography Biography was the retort because it means the guy is swell swell not not swellheaded Some song song titles f remind Frank FranT Schweitzer of or Scranton Pa of or orsome some people Its Ils Written All Over Your Face Jimmy Durante You Aint Been Living Right B. B R. R Hauptmann Hauptmann Hauptmann Haupt Haupt- mann Why Dont Don't You Practice Practice Practice tice What You Preach A. A Hitler Hitler Hitler Hit Hit- ler I 1 Wish Vish That I Were Twins Hue Hucy Long The Breeze Sall Sally Rand Lost Ina in ina a Fog B. B Bernie I Lamoyne Jones Jone a it young youn and highly competent reporter over at atthe atthe atthe the Trib Hurld-Trib distinguished himsel himself himself him him- self sel with ith his Flemington cover cover- age ge Stanley Walker Valker his ex-boss ex tells this about Lamoyne Lamone He He was a student at the school of oC journalism at Columbia university university uni uni- and Dean Ackerman discouraged discouraged discouraged dis dis- him Jones went to see Walker Valker then the editor on West Vest F Fortieth street Dean Ackerman almost wept the student tells me Ill I'll never make a good newspaper man Do you think I should give up the school of journalism 1 Yes do it now was the edi edl- I tors tor's answer anser and start working h here Hes He's been there ever since On Broadway grumbles Al Goodman the they hate to sec see you ou standing hi high h except when youre you're oure ready to fall To which Abe Lyman submits Broadway is like this When youre you're on top the phonics build the molehill mistakes you once made into mountains When hen you are at the bottom they dismiss the big things you did as triv triv- A professor says girls pretend I to be dumb in order to attract men This requires very little acting on the part of most of or them If Huey Is so sincere about his share the wealth plan all h he has to do is to give us a ashare ashare ashare share of his own own I spent 40 10 years ears learning to write says jays Gertrude Gertrude Gertrude Ger Ger- trude Stein No kidding kidding- Dont Don't worry unduly about someone someone someone some some- one stealing your ideas His judgment judgment judg judg- ment is so poor he rarely steals the good ones I write rite nl my own jokes exclaims Ed Wynn Vynn We accept the apolo apology The most precious thing an anyone anyone any any- one man or store anybody or anything can anything can have Is the good goodwill goodwill goodwill will of or others It is something as fragile as an orchid And as beautiful As precious as a gold nugget and as hard to find As powerful as a great turbine and andas as hard to build As wonderful as youth youth and and as hard to keep Amos Parrish Pr Prince nce M M. Romanoff Romano A bouncIng bouncing ing check Victor Moore The fellow who went vent to a convention to listen to the speakers Greta Garbo A frozen kiss Alexander Alexan Alexan- der Double 0 O double L double T and double chin I Lennie Lennic Hayton Haylon was approached b by one of or the lens men who was I peddling tickets for the N. N Y I Press Photographers' Photographers Annual Ball After Aler trying to stall him for days das he finally told the ticket seller Im very sorry but I wont won't be in town You can be assured hoever however however how how- ever that Ill Til be with you in spirit ducky said the hocus- hocus and where would you like your spirit to sit sit sit-in in the section section- or ort orin t in a 10 box 1 |
