Show I AROUND 1 I OWN J THIS SHOULD HAVE HAPPENED HAPPENED HAPPENED HAP- HAP AT BOUNTIFUL A Salt Lake traveling salesman salesman C erIng northern Utah territory by automobile tells this one While speeding through Corinne la ale e In the afternoon to work Bridgham ham City the same evening I accidentallY accidentally acci acci- dentally dentallY struck a Hindu farmer who aM ad not see my ca cat car as he ran across the road to catch a horse At the time the man seemed quite serious serious- 1 l injured After taking him home In my rny car I immediately hunted up tho the thod d sh- sh sheriffs office in town andr and r reported ported to the officer that I I. I ha haft kit a n. Hindu and that he might not live gl 1 vaa waa wa somewhat surprised when Re he e replied with a distinct Scandinavian avian accent A Hindu eh Well Yell have to call can at the county l y C rk's office in Brigham City We Ye dont don't ont pay bounties here Argie Rude Remarks four Our idea of a real snappy society column olumn is one composed of items something after this fashion Mrs r I a richt cross to the n of i Mrs Mrs Fuller Cush's jaw at athe atthe Itha the he Ig a bridge club meeting last nIght ight when Mrs Fuller Fuller-Cush walls was wall wasKO KO s 50 ill advised as to lay a mean trump rump of Mrs De Do ace K The revised motto for today gentlefolk gentlefolk is He lie laughs best ho ho laughs last last last-ex except ept when Khe h be boss cracks the joke We Ve re reId redd d the the other other day that Rhe IC e chorus girls displayed cir Leir versatility AVe We suppose that they received Hare mention I R Exhaustive investigation by Willie tho the eminent scientist who has repudiated the near beer theory proves conclusively he has announced announced announced an- an that blind baseball plays play play- lers s hit curves as easily as straight balls IB Permit Perm it us to inform you that Ray McCarty paid 65 cents for a shoe chine hine yesterday Of course he got II ut ut with it THE SORROWS OF SADIE Chapter So the taxicab man wanted forty Well Vell there are L a lot of us usi i C the sane e san fix Leander ander Hashley piled two e eTs s In an imposing stack Sadie Zadie put on her rings and then ehe he wrung her hands Come across with th the coin trims Thus hus did the bold taxicab driver speak his piece with gestures as he look ok a sip out of ot his fountain pen He tapped Sadie on the noodle Sadie acknowledged this little cour- cour sy lashing him across the eye- eye 1 tI 1 need the money barked the taxi xi man I r Just got through giving ling ing ig to found a school for indigent Maltese meows Lawsy me gurgled Sadies giggling giggling gig gig- gling a couple of gigs they round found that yet ret et Well Veil I didn't eV even evenI n I lino know it was lost Only the fact that she was a om oman n restrained the who was a hold bold fearless man with sixteen en notches in his pocket comb And In another land far over the thea tea a the th- peasant girl Tillie was till- till i ing the soil and neither she nor the king of ot England had ever heard of ot II Sadie Yet t t there ee is a providence that I guides all things things except except fat tat men menon menon on skates s. s Write me a closing chapter gentie gentle gentle gen gen- I tle tie reader Twill be appreciated ed THE TOURIST SEASON Rubberneck wagons lumbering laz laz- laz- laz ily Oh i is East ast Ninth South different from South Ninth East This is s unusual weather It usually doesn't rain like this No you cant can't sink in the lake two Twenty-two and a half per cent salt NEW YORK YiRK May 10 The The appellate appellate ap ap- ap- ap division of the supreme court today denied Geraldine FarI Farrar Farrar Far- Far permission to strike froTh from the I records of ot her divorce suit Fut against I ILou Lou all aU allusion to Miss I Stella StalIn Larrimore year old actress actress act ress named as one of several co co co- I respondents |