Territorial Enquirer | 1881-02-02 | Page 4 | Wit and Humor

wit and humor A young lady in south carolina lately hanged barged berasa from mortification at I 1 ila the defeat of 0 her father for or tho the leg legibly iala ture turc 11 Dora derailed llod 11 Is ia what it is called now BOW when a railroad engine or a car or train lewos leaves or is ili thrown ro wit from the track yonkers renters gazette it la Is moro more blessed to give titan to receive christmas presents our oar address Is ia philadelphia pennsylvania philadelphia news it ia now the now new refrain instead of 0 aba alil meet moat mo at the gate Gal oLove love mod meet me at the love according to the troy pines times by tho the number of pound gets from roin the publishers of 0 lin his now book it must bo be a sterling work nowa news the old gentleman of sixty nitty who was taken in by tho the confidence g gaino lad ball evidently arrived at a I 1 I 1 green 0 old age ge 11 boston commercial bulletin Ual letia aniblo an ohio girl was deserted by her lover at tile tho very foot of the altar altai lucky girl I 1 TUB this is tho the narrowest os as cape on record boston transcript the tha advertiser says bays the most popular loyo love song among romantic tramps is ii most meat mo me by moonlight alono alone 0 01 1 sally bally thou then fairest of cooks cooke bernhardt dios dice so realistically that it is ia said bald that a coronet coroner who saw her ran raa around to the stage door and wasted wanted to hold an inquest boston post an ali ancient proverb slinger clinger has said that 11 it is hard bard tor for an empty bag to stead stand upright it is easy enough however tor for a full fall man to tumble down dovci EN N 0 picayune rio ayune they toll tell ol of a oLona Lou ivilla woman who talked bor bar law jaw out ont of joint but they add that her suiT ering husband went right off for a doctor biow ia this consistent elmira Eli nira free prose pros 1 my darling ho he intensely whispers whimpers vainly attempting I 1 to 0 freize her hand haid do yon know that I 1 love you yon mailly madly 11 oll oh she I 1 I 1 almost yes says any fool coula could tell tall that andrews bazaar aboor A poor copying clerk at the french ministry ol of the interior was lately place ho he occupied there 11 oh a very avory good place he replied I 1 I 1 between the stove and tho the window 11 A slight misunderstanding do yon a OT ever or wink miss misa E Er va angaline e 7 do do I 1 ever what mr 8 2 1 wink what da yon mean sir well vell skate it you theoa tho ox 1 the tha man who died gamo game was never known to quail floston transcript no but bat lo lie ook chis his g gna an a at 1 the lie wrong timo time and now he a is an angel I 1 without wit hont aa shooting j relict now haven register when an indian doctor lag has lost five pat ionta the survivors of the tribe send him after them to see what has baa become ed them altor after all aletho the indians indiana would weald lose loaa some advantages by civilization burlington Hor lington liaw keye if a newspaper shan contain all the pilings that all its readers want it to print it would have bavo to bo be bigger than 1 a bedstead it if it should leave out cut all that each of its readers does not wish to read it would be a blank paper boston transcript mrs lira gummy in looking over tho the advertisement verti tho the other day saw ono one headed 11 radical Bai lical cares 11 well she elie said 11 I 1 am glad inthey if they lava have got a way to cure them radicals tot for been turning tho the world upside dedova down ever since I 1 waff vas it a gal the syracuse standard Stan daril asks 11 why do the street railroads charge children who often take up its as much room oa as grown persons persona half ball price it if any distinction is to bo do drawn at all it should be between the he ia lean and lad the fat it is a question of space anti and not of ago age ladylike qualities tion cannot to be concealed a no matter in what position she eha who 01 0 possesses c esses es them may be placed A A I 1 leadville i I 1 I 1 a I 1 lawyer a er was orosa I 1 a women on the witness stand bland and becoming somewhat abusive she eha exclaimed clai mod 1 I am a lady by thunder and id dont yon yoa forget it ill P philadelphia husbands have induced a local paper to state that 11 the last tiling to explore WM a milliners window two ladies who were looking at tho the now new styles were seriously fri jurod 1 it wont work gentlemen what Is ia danger to a woman compared to the tight light of anew a new bonnet 2 boston post A man was recently saying that he hoped the timo tim would como come when oda edn cation would be tho the only y for a voter I 1 I 1 why bill said a aby by st andor loan can you yon write no said ha le but I 1 can make my mark jalad I 1 find that goes just jagt as far when I 1 sign a law paper new york herald lx alx tan rna lassos A endeavors to instill into the minds minda athla of his pupils tho the great truth that you yon shonia always count a hundred slowly before you speak and live five hundred it it ia a anything very important m por tant lie ba then takes his ki stand by the ato re and anil after ettor soma lomo minutes observes that I 1 tho lipa 0 all his hia Boho lara are moving liy and noiselessly pro presently antly and simultaneously they all 11 II break out four hundred and nine I 1 five hundred I 1 say teacher your coat cost tails lire are all on fire are P I 1