| Show i ear breathing barbers we do not put pet hall half enough huun donee in mature she has shown us na a thousand thou thon tand sand ways that she cin c in bo be trusted when anything now new is such as ai a now new kind of bag bueto to devour potatoes pota toen or a now and deadly anim alonlo to in eat pork the produces it andyes and yet when i ban wo we perceive Te that there is ia an i im 1 mediano want of something our OIK fi first r at I 1 impales in pulse la Is to try to supply it ourselves of leaving the matter in the ban hands la 0 of nature this timorous want of I 1 Is unworthy of intelligent pomplo nad and deserves to be severely to ro bukal it ittai lai recently loon boon Elgi villy rebuked by nature horsell herself who while we were nt riving vainly to aln find I 1 n remedy for barbers hai quietly prod need a now type of barber that la Is all that man could plan rian i without number cumber has bag been rug lug with 4 view to checking the harbor barbers a conversation and prove utin 9 him from even minding blinding to tonio conlo the las cunil number er of patents antt which have been obtained lor for barbers muzzles in uzi e a would anthonieh ant onieh any one who la Is not dot fatal I 1 0 to aliar nr with the record bacor racor do of the pate 13 t lions of these muzzles has been thoroughly the first dif dit goulty in the way of the use of a muzzle Is in that n no 0 bar bar will wittingly put ono one on ila be stands on oil his bis righta as a citizen and claims that free speech IS a privilege diego expressly Beon secured reil to him by tho the constitution there might it is in arne be something accomplished if the legislature would pass a law laff making it penal tor for any ally ua no nuz nuzzled barber to ply his hia trade but bit it would be almost impossible to induced any legislature to pass a measure so BO purl purely philanthropic rod 2 d so BO entirely d devoid a of f a any PG lary profit to the legislate moreover r r io in the few to in stances in which muzzles have been either peaceably or forcibly placed on barbers barbera it lias has been found that they did not prevent the barber from making mailing sounds son do for conversation and quite ai maddening the only way to boodro his hia complete coni pleto silence la ili to usa nie a burzle mutila that hermetically bohla his mouth month and nose bach a MAZZIO WEIS was in chicago some years ago and anil with complete success ess 10 90 tar far as 03 fence duplig tho the barber to a Is was eon con earned corned the trouble with it waa van that the barber diedolf died of suffocation filomin favo mio utes ate after tho the muzzle was or applied plied and an unprincipled a coroner co contrived to matia make the incident the oc caBlOn of dooh annoyance annoy anoe to the inventor of the ilia ale but nind min haa failed ailsa to td do nature has joint done in the town of altoona peon penn thero there has appeared a new and improved tapo of harbor barbei TUH this admirable person breathes through his ears eara there appears to be a small passage in each caoli ear pawing passing on oa one side aide of the tympanum and connecting the throat with the outside oat Blila air through this tho the now barber can breathe with perfect ease case while his bis hearing does not act seats to bo be any less leas licato thin that of the tha usual sort cort a of f barber ile is said to be very prud ond ol of tn peculiarity which anh makes tir him ca to a d kifor from other barbers and is in the habit of permit perm 1 ting ling life his customers to place a planter over hill hi mouth and ta monkey aronah on his nose noeo in in order to prove that he ha can breathe with both nose and mouth closed of course lie he cannot talk through hi itis eare sears for if lie ha could he ha would lie 18 utterly useless no ila cannot even malto make the slightest sound by way of his hia oars ears and when his bis mouth mont tind and nose are closed he is as silent us its the be grays chii Is ibo kind of barber for which we leave live vainly longed that snob a barber should finally have appeared may seem to many people to be only a dream kanj but u t it is nevertheless nevert helesa a splendid reality ita ila has been de by nature in in order to meet a groa groat want twAnt we vo carnot show too much mach gratitude for this boon and we should never again manifest the slightest want of in bencal bale efi cent nature mature of course the ilia altoona barber Is only the tha first specimen of 0 the us new w decies of ailant barbers barberi others hii will 1 U upp a carin it r in oth other r places and a ahn da day W will if come whom when in ili accordance it ca WN ili heru a r n 10 loof of the survival of c f the fittest fit teat the ilia altoona variety of barbers will bo be the only vari van ety known lu in the meantime this happy consummation cau can be hoban a d by the conversion coaver aion of our prevent barbers into ato ear breathing barbers there Is ia no doubt that a okill fal surgeon burgeon could with thu the old aid of a pair of small email silver tubes the outer cuter ear of any ny barber with life his throat if it wore wora to be pointed out ont to our barbers that onless they submit to this operation they will rave have no BO customers sud and mill find the oar ear breathing barbers enjoying 9 a monopoly of business bug inoa they we would old doubtless reail ily put pat themselves under nailer iho bonds bands of the luo surgeon geon and if in a low few to ID was jes the operation should hopp happ to prove prote fatal it is improbable V I 1 any blame would be attached to 10 tj i surgeons burgeons ur geons how much more beautiful does this world seem since bince the advent of the barbora lie ile brings with him tho th hops hope of the th of ann in n kind from tonsorial tons 0 rial conversation the hopa bops of th the near most and nil total disappearance of tanio haill silent voiceless nill haill naw york times |
