| Show wit and cumor A contribution b box a li is a HI blokel us na affair when does rain become too loo familiar with a lady when it begins to patter on oa the busk back there Is a close relation between a star and a meteor one is i a son the tha other a darter an hibernian account ot of it a duel says th that a it oria one party man woun Jal and the tao w other her uroil in the air never run up small debts bredl tora lot tire are like ob ildren the smaller they tire lire the tha moro more they cry f wall street gazette the girls have hare taken to carrying citi cunes oes and young man it you yon dont want your eye prodded out mind it I 1 cotton boston pont young mercantile men who go 11 out collecting are often found collecting ut the theater on matinee days now new orleans picayune and it if you must wear bows on your dresse young la lady d y the tha newest kind him b have ave biz x loops and t two 0 ondi ends and both 6 ends ads and loops hang downward an iowa farmer says I 1 I 1 we raise four hundred bushels of potatoes to the aora acre here bare which would be a big thing if we raise insects enough to eat sin em all up says the polar wave is 2 a blistering sirocco compared with the tha cold wave ware of 0 the land hand which a girl once gave him when ho be proposed to marry her 11 it if you want to catch astell flah my boy remarked an oll old salt aalt to an inexperienced youth 11 you must yank the line I 1 last eat a quarter of a second before you yon feel a bite AP an exuberant youth hails bails u supposed suppo Boil acquaintance on the street with 11 hollo joe but bat finding hia bill mistake ladds adds I 1 I 1 0 excuse me I 1 thought you were another man laconic laconia str stranger angor answers 11 lie bo I 1 am here hera is an 11 elligant 11 extract from a 14 temperance sermon delivered the other day in county kerry drink is ft a cures it makes a man bato bate I 1 his wife starve his bia chil children draia go shoot his landlord and miss him too bedad P A boyish noville novice in smoking blacking turned deadly pale and throw threw away ilia his cigar said be 11 something in that a air I 1 i r cigar made me sick 11 I 1 know what it is said b bis Is companion pulling away what Toba 11 well well said bald billington majestically jestic ally 11 wo we be too bonoro un on the young fellows I 1 up poso I 1 was its as big a fool as any of them when I 1 was young yes replied fogg 11 and you are a not at on all old man bow billington three red haired men walked solemnly into a main street saloon and stood blood before the bar hello said bald the barkeeper in a tone of interest chos elected oh I 1 bg beg pardon he added 11 I 1 thought it was a torchlight procession 11 do da reason what tor for we presented do de resignation of our pastor wits was for de cause dat his services had become dlo beneficial to do de church was the he explanation pl li nation given by a colored trustee in answer war to an inquiry as to the pastora motive for leaving A toxin preacher who bad a falling out with his bia congregation received an app appointment ointment as oha chaplain of the penitentiary tent iary lary and he ha preached his flew farewell sermon from this text 1 I I 1 go to pro pra pare a place for you that where I 1 ant am there ye may be ba also A young lady not nob accustomed to waltzing at the earnest solicitation of a friend made the attempt recently when the music coas ceased eill another friend approached and said bald gaily 11 well I 1 see you yon got through all right yes was phe the reply but it was a pretty tight squeeze tobacco planters in kentucky will put in larger crops chopa this year tobacco at ten cents centa pays pale better than kemp hemp at live aex ex if kentucky would raise more hemp a great in many any of her citizens 1 would not only cease to cultivate bat chow chew less tobacco loudon london tenn journal A clergyman once while reading the burial service came to the place where h he to must say aay our deceased brother 0 or r sister lie ile did not know which no DO turning to a mourner he asked whether it was a I 1 I 1 brother or a sister the mourner innocently said no r xela elation tien at all sir only an acquaintance an exchange says say 11 men should not cot allow their wives to split wood good when she iha puts her arms arias around your neck iteck and coos now honey lot let me chop the wood while say my dear old bear rests himself what is a man to do but lot let her have avo her own way you yon seem to forgot there la it a certain consideration that every man owes his hia wife BUM bars said patrick rubbing his hig head with delight at the prospect of a present from his employer 1 I 1 always nano mane to do my duty I 1 believe you u replied the employer and therefore therefore I 1 shall make you a present of nil all you yon have stolen from me during the year I 1 I 1 I 1 thank your honor replied aar pat it 11 and muy all your friends and acquaintances quain treat you yon as liberally A new H h e farmer mer recently agreed to sell lia his farm for 2000 but when the day came he told the expectant purchaser that his wife was in hysterics about the trade and ile he guessed hou hed have to book back out the purchaser complained and finally asked how much more would induce him to sell bell well replied the thrifty son sea of the granite state 11 give div 1 me more and well let her cry general jackson hated affectation and one day lad had at his hia dinner party a tennessee judge with a wife whose head had bad been quite turned by a season at washington present also was a brother of the lady who had bad been a tailor which fact was carefully ignored the ladys sits airs and graces grow grew ingot fe fo rable and finally general jackson pricked the bubble of her pride by saying baying to her brother broth sr you know I 1 really never have had a comfortable coat coal on my back since alace you unit tailoring what a tiresome thing that mrs S smith mith ial exclaimed mrs brown 1 I called there today to day and she ran on so telling about her new 0 carpet a et sn and her now new hail house 1 girl irl and h her e r rab babas ab y a two teeth and b her 1 now new bonnet that I 1 got get a chance to speak a word woid about my now new tick back or our parlor garniture farni farn turo iture or freddys freddya coming down with the measles or sarah janes of uncle charles rheumatism or how bridget ba burnt zit that batch of binouitz bia biso onit oil oh thes such it a tiresome lir esome boston transcript 1 |
