Show rix ow 1w ii < CLAUDE 4 t ASKEN A HARD MAN IN o THE FREE LANCE fcI PCfc r 1 t r = = U I I1 1 i i IM ii i iM1 vmuffi a a i Ji ai MJKL4tv ja L I V > k JIlfFfLofj JII i I 7 rY1lWICI IInI lf IrEIII J IjWIrIbW rt u hi Once I was openhanded and generous gen-erous a lover of life a dreamer of dreams fond of helping lame dogs over stiles warmhearted and full of sympathy sympa-thy now I am morose cold selfcen tered and those who call me a hard man are right I am a hard man self Righteous cold pitiless 1 Once the cry of a wounded bird or Ii hare could hurt me pitifully and I glowed and was gentle to the beasts of lItho Held now I get my days work out of my cattle and my horses and then have the useless leasts destroyed Once my hnnd was ewer In my pocket > and I gave to the doserving and the un dpscrving the plea of hunger being enough now I draw back and look the vagrant In the face all he slinks away 1 give two good checks a year one to the hospital fund and one to the Charity Char-ity Organization fioolety for as I said before I am a just man j I can see from the face of my wife Hint the doctor Jias 1 told her what hew he-w II not tell me Aliendy she has begun to feel the pudden Independence that my death will bring her the servants are coming to her for orders she Is slipping into the position of head of the house She walks all the firmer l for this Increase of rule and more body has come into her thin voice i I wonder if she will mourn me I suppose she will for she Is a virtuous conventional Englishwoman but sho will not indulge in any wild tropical bursts of grief and she will always be mindful of the presence of the domestic audience I can feel I perfectly certain I that my funeral will be a thoroughly orthodox and expensive one and that my widow will mourn me in the exact degree of crupe She has I > enand still Isa handsome hand-some woman In her way this wife of mine she looks well sitting behind her pair of horses and she wears her Jewels Jew-els I easily She Is neither smart nor dowdy but English of the best Ever since I put a wedding ring on her finger she has done her duly well nnd conscientiously and being so perfectly per-fectly Immaculate she has not been afraid of me as a lighter woman might shave been but has swept serenely through life undisturbed by ray grave coldness asking for nothing except material ma-terial comfort expecting nothing from me that my check book cannot supply We have two children a son and a daughter They are as their parents cold and selfsatisfied honest and justIn Just-In all their dealings very hard on sin nerF being above temptation them 4n f y In n i 1 S Y w i I selves The boy has made me his model mod-el no fear of wild oats from Ernest why the boy has not got a single honest hon-est passion in him The girl resembles her mother she is quietly selfish calm and unemotional she is rather musical in a ladylike nay and affects n faint lilting for alt The children respect and rather admire I ad-mire me I wonder what they would say If I they could sec me as I was the sort of man I was In the old days Ernest Er-nest would look at me with coldly critical criti-cal eyes f and smile a little deep queer smile that he reserves for the benefit of the sentimentalists for whom hI 1 has such a hearty contempt and Mary would open her large gray eyes and flush a horrified pink They have both of them Just been to sec me Their mother has told them the news I expect for Ernest has adopted a manner of affectionate condolence con-dolence that is especially irritating and Mary looks a little nervous and her eyelids arc slightly t red They both look at me expectantly curiously Am 1 not on the brink of the great unknownV Well If they arc roldblooded young creatures am I to blame them I who gave them their natures na-tures and their lire J can feel even bore In my death chamber the sup prosped thrill of excitement that Is going go-ing through the house How the servants ser-vants will gloat tonight over the engrossing en-grossing topic of my funeral I can almost al-most hear their low voices discussing the probable size and price of the coffin and number of the mourner The servants wont affect sorrow why should they I have been a hard l I master My nurse that quiet motlpnless woman wo-man Is beginning to look at mesharp quick glances 1 expectshe wishes the death bed scene well over and all that follows it 1 notice that she has already begun to collect some of her small personal trllles things that have been littering her little table for the last three weeks yes she has begun to make ready for her departureand mine She Is now rollIng up her long strip of embroidery collecting the balls of colored silk her sectors and thimbleIn they all go to her big work bag now the string Is drawn and tied Somehow I dont fancy that nurse Evans ww III open her bag again in this house Jt will be packed away in her trunk this afternoon and It will accompany ac-company her to another case next week She is sitting perfectly still now her strong white hands folded in her lap waiting I close my eyes and look back I pass by the last twenty years and 1 go 11 IU eager and glad and it was > good to be alive days when I believed in man and trusted In Godsuch glad days such good days I had a brother whom I loved as my own self lie was weak lovable and pleasureloving 1 was father and mother to the boy for we were orphans and though I the eldest son what of that We shared and shared alike what was mine was his for T loved the boy boyWe hunted we drove we shot together to-gether we filled the old house with friends of school and college days we lived a fresh openair lifeand Jonathan I Jona-than was not dearer to David than my brother to i me Then she came desirable subtle beautiful I warned him of her as the wise queen warned her son Lemuel and all the boy did was to laugh She had a high price that woman a man had to give her his youth as well as his riches and the day she gave him was a very short day My brother 1cak and facile fell into her trap and I strong In my power of will and full of the rash arrogance of youth determined to Have him He at I any rate should not Join the ranks of the befooled and the ruined Introduce me to her I persuaded him likely enough she Is the pure roman ro-man you talce her to be cruelly traduced tra-duced by slander Let me see her and Judge S So he look me to her house one summer sum-mer afternoon and I found her very beautiful She was dressed very simply nnd her voice was soft and most musical I noticed no-ticed Jewels worth a kings ransom on her hands and I knew their price and hers She had dark beautiful eyes eyes I whose depths It might have taken a lifetime to explore and her smile must have come down to her a heritage from whole generations of light women who knew the strange subtle mysteries of love She had all the seductions of a woman with something of the exquisite mystery of a girl I looked at her and I decided that she was worth a high price but not worth my brothers soul She saw in I what spirit I had come to meet her the first day we met and because be-cause she was a woman and power Is sweet she matched her strength with mine She tossed my brother aside lightly He bored her she wrote him so let him keep away but I got hot pas Bionale letters bidding me come and dine with her and I went The first night I drove out alone to dine with her My I brother stood In the hall and watched me drive away He looked at me hardly and reproachfully but said nothing AVhen I got her second note of invitation invita-tion I tossed it over to him Read her character I cried and thank God that I saved you from her tolls To fall in them yourself perhaps Never dear boy let her dash herself her-self against me till she breaks I know the wanton for what she Is I love her he answered sullenly and what business Is it of yours to I come between us Do you want to marry her God forbid I cried I at least have some respect for my mothers memory He laughed a little bitterly then went out calling to the dogs to follow him He did not ask me though The days went on and I saw her twice thrice many times I was young and strong in those day and men called me handsome I was clever and then I had a q at deal of money Oh yes I had all the qualities she loved and she fought hard to win meWhat were men like my brother to her Poor fools lightly won But here was a prize after her own heart a stiff sullen fish to angle for and land She bent her brows and she bit her mouth and we fought it out together fought for all we were worth She tried to charm me first as she had lured my brother She gave me soft looks Inviting smiles I laughed for I knew the first simple rules of the game After a while she abandoned those light weapons and then the trouble begun be-gun for she seemed to become a new beinga shrinking frightened creature all raw with shame She troubled me sadly for the life of me I could not understand her role She flung herself away from h or past and lovers and she came out shyly to I meet me her big dark eyes pleading for merciful Judgment How could I deny those eyes compassion compas-sion that figure shorn of its Jewels and trlnketG respect She stood before me helpless and n woman I said ot my heart This is only a cunning wile of a great temptress but my heart answered Liar love has made her pure this Is your work she loves you You have conquered and broken me utterly utterly she whispered I am yours for evermore yours to have and to hold or to trample In the dust under your feeL I looked at her and as God Is my I Judge I desired her soul more than her body that newborn ahlvcxing soul that looked at me out of her dark tired eyes I saw a spirituality in the worn face and a strange grandeur in the bowed form that love had redemed All at once 1 understood the song of the wind the sob of the sea the throb of life Nature woke In my heart and made mo brotherof the world I felt the sudden strong sweetness the overwhelming over-whelming ecstasy of love and Its deep and utter tenderness I opened my arms and she lay on my breast tired and exhausted I had not mind to kiss her or to feel the raptures of loeIt was better to Drotect and hold her for love wall to he her cleansIng cleans-Ing sacrament I am not worthy not worthy sho moaned letting great tears roll down her cheeks I only held her the closer Her tears were dearer to me than her kisses would have been I told my brother the truth that night hid nothing from him I watched his face grow white and the young mouth harden He cursed me under his breath then rose to his feet and left the study slumming the door behind him lie will think hard thoughts tonight I said to myself but he will come tome to-me In the morning and shake my hand he will see things as they are din the morning see and understand Did lie understand In the morning Ah God alone can answer me that question ques-tion For though I hear day and night the voice of my brothers blood crying to me from the ground I can make no words out of that cry only ineffable reproach re-proach Brother mine brother mine a poor reword re-word for the love 1 gave you the tenderness ten-derness I bore you to let me come upon you suddenly that August morning and find you sleeping stark and cold the pistol In your hand and with that damp red stain on your forehead Outside rhe bright pleasant bedroom the birds were twittering merrily and Gods sunshine was being poured lavishly lavish-ly on hill and dale and there you lay white cold and silenta boy outwitting woman She was never for you brother I only saved you I never robbed you Had you the strength to crush the flesh out of her you to Whom her flesh appealed so strongly 1 Had you the power to call the seven deils out you a poor reed In her hands Had you the patience to win back I and reclaim a soul Ah cruel dead boy you had the brain to know one great truth that the dead are more powerful than the living and knowing that you took the web of your life Into your own hands and being sole master of your destiny you tore that web and rent it I made a vow over your dead body you should have that for which you had died It was not my fault oh beloved one do not blame me for it she cried clinging to me with honorfilled eyes und white tifmbling lips I did i not answer her but I took her clinging hands and pushed her away from me pushed her out Into the black unrkncss of desolation and despair I heard her cry like a wild creature torn by the beasts but T shut my cars against the death wall of her ugpny I know that presently she would stagger and fall back Into the pit from whence T had drawn her and that Its mud would ooze over and cover her I went and stood by your dead body brother and as I folded your dead hands I understood the cold triumph of your smile Yes after nil the weakling was the I conqueror for he had won his purpose t I Outside in the dark I heard her sobbing sob-bing moans and I stood In the Hghiotl death chamber and dared not let her Inv In-v I went abroad after my brother funeral fu-neral and I walked the earth moclding its vileness In my heart hating men and women Time passed on i I took up the role of the stern man the hard man the just man I paid my debts and T claimed my dues even to the uttermost farthing farth-ing I owed It to my name and land to marry I married a wife and hnd two healthy children There Is very little I can safely say that I have had to do and have not done n d My wife has Just come Into the room She has got a red patch of color on either heck and tears In her eyes poor woman why should she grieve I have been a hard husband She has come to my bedside nnd bending over me she kisses my forehead fore-head sadly affectionately If I have left anything undone forgive for-give me dear she whispers You have left nothing undone I answer an-swer you have been a model wife and mother She turns away a little sob In her throat we have eaten and drunken and lived our life together for the last twenty twen-ty years and this Is our farewell this the final winding up of our married life Have I failed In my duty No you have exceeded it The nurse goes up and whispers to ttkl3 my wife I catch the pound of our excellent < ex-cellent vicars name Oh I am to have the prayers of the church am I Well l I have been a liberal parishioner by all f means let me have my > moneys worth 7 Y t k rI 11 The good man has come and gonehe has read me really a beautiful psalm c and has said the prayers selected for these occasions and now I am alone utterly j ut-terly alone i People are in the room of course but they only scorn like shadows black t misty shadows and their voices sound far away and unreal I Everything la growing very dark and i black I wonder what Is going to happen i hap-pen Will God let me molder In my grave and sleep quietly till the end of all i things I should be well satisfied to do that unless Oh Thou Thou whose i presence I feel and yet of whom I know nothing remember not my offences and atone to me for my sorrows They will soon be putting a heavy t t stone over me carving on It the name 1 the dole and a text or twowell i well 411 I lily I wife will come nnd the children will Romp they will carry costly r wreaths they will be subdued In manner man-ner a little sad and sorry I wish I had been a warmer husband a f kinder fathertoo late too late 1 1 + Perhaps on some dark night some t wild and stormy night or rainy misty 1 t evening a dark thin figure will creep out of the shadow herself a black shadowand come to the rich mans I w the hard mans unwept rave t1 I Vile of the vilest ruined wretched she may press her poor bruised mouth c to the cold atone fling her end weight on s i the grave nnd 1C she comes oh God if she comcF let it be Resurrection Morning for us both |