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Show THE MRS. ASTOR. George Horton. . Great heavens! What Is this we hear? What means this rumor dreadful Two dames at outs, and each, oh dear ! Of vengeance has her head full. How can this world of ours spin round No slower and no faster! Let all things ceaw until we've found Out who is Mrs. Astor ! Sassiety is to its deeps Stirred like some mighty puddle, Where fl-shes nht with caudal sweeps, And all the waters muddle. O Where's McAllistf r? O where Their church's oily pastor? Will no one part thete ladles fair, Whoe'er is Mrs. AHtor? Alas, why should such dreadful tend Arise just at this Juncture, When England's likely to be rude, And threats our peace to puncture? We cannot light, nor strike a blow At Vic, although we've sussed her. Until this mighty fact we know, Which Is the Mrs. Astor. How little and how trivial now The tariff, prices, wages ; How small the Guatemalan row A mightier battle wages! The European thunder cloud Bah I That's a small disaster. Just hear those caterwaullugs loud ! Which Is the Mrs. Astor? , O shade of gentle Washington, Of Perry. Jackson, Warren ! Is this the country that ye won From hordes of cockneys foreign? Columbia of this silly fray Has had enough to laiit her. Now let us know, and know for aye, Which Is the Mrs. Astor. |