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Show FOR THE LADIES. "My notion of a wife at forty is," saidJerrold, "that a man should be able to change her like a bank note for two twenties." It is said that there is nothing so calculated to call out the deep earnestness ear-nestness of woman and enlist her most faithful devotion as doing up her back hair. "Mamma," said a precocious little boy, who against his will was made to rock his little baby-brother, "if the Lord has any more babies to give way, don't you take them." At a wedding at Lafayette, Indiana, the choir sang"Come ye Disconsolate. The bride said if the people would wait till the ceremony was over, she would put a mansard roof on tho head of tho leader. A Connecticut chap was married the other day on a license which read : "i.'ou are hereby granted a permit to build one wood building, twenty-four by thirty eight feet in the fire limits," etc. Fond mother (to visitor) "And as for Susie there, my dear, she's so clever ! Physics her doll regularly with dirt Dills, and has just been and amputated am-putated one of the poor dumb thing's legs, and so we're going to make a doctor of her." "When the earthquake took place," said a husband to his wife, "I lull my heart beat so that I was frightened." "Yes," replied the dear creature, "it takes an earthquake to make your heart beat." And the couple have celebrated their silver wedding ! A Kansas editor, anxious to eclipse the eabWrn fashion journals, adds to his description of a wedding trousseau this astounding item : "The bride is to have trai'ing night-gowns oh, such beauties ! with ever such long trails five feet at least," A Boston housekeeper comes to die sad conclusion that the position of a hired girl is far more enviable than that of "mistress" of the house, and that it would be preferablo in point of ease not to mention morality, to hire out for a home than to "marry for a home." A Cincinnati judge decides that a boy marrying under the age of eighteen eigh-teen years, without the consent of his parents or guardins, may repudiate such marriage and marry again if he docs not recognize his f.rst wife a such after he is eighteen. A fine opening for scoundreliMu. An Irishman went in great grief to a neighbor to lay out his grandmother fur burial. Accordingly, that night, a couple of the ladies went over, when, to their great astonishment, the man met them at the gate, informing them ".No hurry, rOie ain't dead yet ; but ye may begin bilin' the water to waih her in." Mrs. Belmont has the ino.-t ltaut i-ful i-ful emeraid.s in New York ; Mrs. K. L. Stewart the uiot beautiful opal ; Mrs. Stevens the handsomest arrangement arrange-ment of diamonds and aiucthy.-ls. So many ladies have diamond that it would be impossible to say whose are the most Luautil'ul. Mrs. Yon Hoffman Hoff-man has perhaps the handsomest necklace of diamonds, which she wears on green velvet, a charming background. |