Show Aj 8 The Modern Fable Fabe of the F l Ve U Three Johns of Johnville I By George Ade A de I OHN FIRST was Hying on the Ute JOHN JOH Fringe of but be he wanted win ged to t get away way from It ft altogether ither So Sobe Sobe be packed MB Ills whole what Kit JOt and Caboodle Into a le that had a Jug Ju of or Jack hidden In the Straw This was wall in tile the Good Old Dar Dayi when wilen we w had tad no DO Dog Dig Parties at Newport and the Millionaire was wu a Rare Bird John the First was wall a Poor White e but that Fact never nt er depressed him na UI I I K Kas as rus the PI Plug UK Tobacco held hel out Olt He kept k t his race face toward the h Setting s Sun s for r many 8 k kraa DayS DayL New and then the Sharp Crack of a Rifle Ride would ring out t tD on the Frosty Air raa and another Redskin would bite the tha thaI Dist I D i st John war WP 1600 1500 miles from a aSh Sh Bath and t give a Continent Continental al at HI Hla HIli homespun Suit fit Mm Im too t O soon Ina na the dust dut of the Trait Trail was In his Whiskers but in those thoe Days Das Flon r t on his hI Looks Looka John was Wall and nd Bc der Huff Ian from the th remote Head Wt Wa W Waters t of or Bitter Crick He own such sucha sutha a thing thins as a Boiled 1 Shirt and little did h he suspect that some day his Posterity would be pla playing I ing g Golf John ot was w an Empire e Builder I er but t lie did dl not t know It IEm He lie headed for t the t Boundless I Rest eit so o 0 that he ht could find plent of Big Game and put in about two ha o to Corn and not acres Beres of or Corn and not have havo to 10 York Work i i i a i I I as asa r a r 1 YV ll Ji John I L Ls At last 8 he squatted on the Banks of o a Stream s a whore res Fishing l t was a good He lie e eo eu eup put u up a log Shack and proposed to a broad t faced dt Squaw U who o gently l but firmly t pave gave him the Mitten Bearing up under ir this h Disappointment he continued to pitch Horseshoes hooray for tor Andrew Jackson and ano take Ague Medicine One day ay he snaked a Piece of or Calico CaUco oft off of a pausing passing Emigrant Wagon When ml they e were spliced by 1 y a Horse Doctor to they could not foresee forese for that this was the be beginning beginning beginning ginning of or the th House e of or John Soon after arter this he traded a Gallon of or for acres of or Land such is na It wa was The Steamboats came un vu the River and topped stopped tO nt ft Johns Landing I It was w r 1 ailed Johns Landing not because ca e ew eany of any nm desire to do honor to the lowdown r Trash but because John was the whole Settlement By and by there was nas a Row of or Log Houses Hou called Main Street Also a General Then Johns old Ad agil t J Chills Chill n and Fever got a Jim tree Coil Coll on him and he cashed d in John the Second fell M Into the sop Acres of IO Sc because e no DO one Oft on had h d bas basi bno i m o U h enough to db buy It from the Old Tan aru The Railroad l vp d came n along and I cut throe lt It n f 4 n Johns Johna subdivision In with the Real neal Estate Boom Boons J John h i th tho the Second began to wear war a Paper c niler n on Sundays SUnday and he be lived in a aHou Hou that had a Bay Window ow on one Bide Ills His Family wore boil Clothes f c rand and played Croquet About this time Limo It j was discovered dl that John the First pos I ee e 4 wonderful Foresight Fort ight The Land i iJohn I Ii iI I II I i I I F I II I i iJohn I 4 41 1 iI John IT II he bought was now sprinkled with Frame Houses Lutheran Churches Saloons and Drug Stores and was selling at so much mucha a front Foot John the Second was known as a Prominent Citizen and be became became came Director in a Bank He put his Napkin around his Neck at the Table and got balled up on his Grammar but buthe buthe he was there with the Dough so a good many Allowances were made made When the Governor of the State came swinging around the Circle he put up at Johns House and after that he was addressed as lion Hon John and at times his Wife corn com pelted him to wear a Necktie He switched from Cheroots to Cigars Fitt FittZ I zw Z r JS i iL iu I I I L u 4 rA John IlL IlLand 1 and had a l Ba hay Bay Window put on the House Houfe Ho and it was wall whispered around that John was wa throwing on un a Heap of Dog DOR I When tit hen he finally shuffled d he had over oyer two miles of Buggies BuS i and Carriages follow I him to th the Graveyard The Bereaved Family put up a Marble Shaft as tall as asa asa asa a Smokestack I IJohn iJohn John the Third received a Collegiate Education and discovered 9 a Family Crest He learned that his Ancestors hart had fought with the Stuart Stuarta But he say anything about his Grandfather righting fighting tl Clothes with the Mosquitoes He HI had bad his I Clothes g made In New York O and used d a Quart of Florida rl na Water Water te every day a Ho H sprinkled the Rugs with It being a Gen in fn every sense of the word Af ter building a House that cost ever so flO much he spent most moat of or his time at the The reason J was that the Family could not find suitable So Society Society Society in Johnville And where they went they did not find anything else The ordinary Plugs had to put on Smoked Glasses when they looked at the members of the John Family Anyone Anone In Johnville who was invited to Dine at the Big House was given such a Lift that he touch anything but the High Spots for tor a week afterward One Day a Stranger In to town saw all the People falling off the Sidewalk and groveling In fn the Dust before the August Presence of John the Third Thirdy Why y does everyone KowTow to the Gentleman rp with t the Aristocratic Fea tures he asked said his Friend He comes of a very very verv Old Family MORAL MORA Truth Is 18 stranger than Fic Fiction Fiction Fiction tion especially In a Democracy Copyright 1901 by Robert Howard Rus Russell Russell Russell sell |