| Show I I QUEER QUEE W LEF JOKERS jOKERS I Now N w York There is a fortunate woman somewhere In New York state who Tf it T received under the terms of ot her late Iati husbands will ten cents Her good fortune lies not in n the amount bequeathed to herbut her but In the fact that tt she sh receives it from her late husband In other words that man was too mean to live Probably he ho thought when ho he gave sao de do devised sed and bequeathed a to the wo woman man who had darned his socks for twenty years that he had done something dar daringly darIngly darIngly original Not so eo Tho The shelves storerooms and underground vaults of ot probate courts all over the world are ar crammed rammed with posthumous witticisms and lunacies Ever since making was invented and that was years ago the cross and crafty have bave lain awake nights nighta wondering how they could make their wills queerer than any they ever heard about Here are some of ot the tho results My Iy fortune would have been larger had I not married one on of tha the cleverest legal dayLight robbers remarked the thelast thelast las last t testament of a railway man who died last year cutting his helpmate off with the American equivalent of a shil shU shilling ling my iry associations with this thia human perambulating vinegar cruet I consider to have cost me m about 2000 Another New York man recently left to provide liquid refreshments for every person attending his funeral and ordered that every legatee living within miles of ot New York who staved away from the funeral without good excuse should forfeit his share of the estate state The approach of death struck William Jackett of Islington as singularly poetic When he came to the business of making his will he lie e burst into rhyme I give and bequeath When Im laid underneath To my two loving sisters most dear The whole ot of my store Were Vera It twice as much more Which U Gods goodness has granted me here And that none may prevent This my will and intent I Or occasion the least law racket With solemn appeal I confirm sign and seal This the true act at and deed of WILL ILL JACKETT SACKETT JACKETTI I It Is a matter of ot record that this ex extraordinary extraordinary will win was probated and un unchallenged unchallenged Unchallenged challenged So was the ef effusion effusion effusion fusion of John Hedges who died near London almost two centuries s ago Said Mr Hedges This fifth day da of May being airy and gay To hip not Inclined but of vigorous mind And my body bodyn In health Til rn dispose of ot my wealth And of all I am to leave on this side of the grave J I To some one or other I think to my brother broth r But because I foresaw that my brothers in law If I did not take tak care would come in for fora a share Which I 1 in no ways intended till their manners were mended And of that God knows theres no sign I II 1 I therefore enjoin And strictly command as witness my hand That naught I havo have got be brought to hotchpot But I give and devise as much as In me melies melies melies lies To the son of or my ray mother my own dear brother brotherTo To have and to hold all my silver sliver and gold goldAs goldAs goldAs As the affectionate pledges of his hs brother JOHN HEDGES Cruelties Imposed on Heirs In Leicester lived a man named Ser Sergeant Sergeant geant scant who drew up a singularly cruel document for the discomfiting of ot his heirs His nephews were to retain his hS money only so 50 long as they rose roso early earl From October 1 to October 5 they must get up at 5 and exercise study or work till 8 From October 5 to April 1 they must get up at 7 and exercise study or work till tUl 9 A lovable German professor who died in n Berlin years ago left property to his sole surviving relative on condition that he ho wear white linen clothes the year round without extra undergarments In winter Stanislas a resident of left an enormous fortune to a notary Lotz Lots on condition that before receiving It the poor notary perform In Inthe Inthe inthe the operas of ot Othello and La Son at the Scala in Milan marz marn believed that Lotz had a beautiful voice History kindly draws a veil eil over ov r the debut One of the funniest wills ever drawn is that of ot Dr of ot Canada though it Is doubtful If It all his legatees saw tha th joke To my eldest sister Joan be begins begins begins gins the doctor my field to console her for being married to a man mansho she sho is obliged to henpeck To my second sister Sally SaIly the cot cottage cottage cottage tage that stands beyond the said field with its garden because as no one Is likely to marry her it will be large enough to lodge her herTo herTo herTo To my third sister Kate the family Bible recommending her to learn as much of Its spirit as she already knows of its letter that she may become a bet better better better ter Christian To my fourth sister Mary my grand grandmothers grandmothers grandmothers mothers silver snuff box that she may not be ashamed to take snuff before com corn company compan pany pan panTo To my fifth ister Lydia Ldla my drinking cup for reasons known to her herself herself herself self To my brother Ben Den my books that he may learn to read with them To my brother James my big sliver silver watch that he may know the hour at which men ought to rise from their beds To my Jack a punch punchbowl punchbowl punchbowl bowl because he will do credit to It Evens Up To my Christopher my best pipe out of gratitude that he mar married marred red ned my sister Maggie whom no man of ot taste would have taken To my friend John Caddell a silver teapot that being afflicted with a slat slatternly slatternly slatternly wife wile he may drink tea to his comfort A French woman who died recently at atthe atthe atthe the age ae of 90 Q left l ft much property to her het relatives but made this provision I 1 leave to my y physician whose enlightened ned care cara and wise prescriptions have made 1 de deme me live JIve so s long lorig all that I 1 contained In Inthe Inthe Inthe the old oaken chest In my boudoir When the gratified physician opened the chest he ha found intact all the drugs potions that he had prescribed for the lady during the past twenty years year earsA A practical Joker was of T He left a sealed package marked To Tobe Tobe Tobe be opened after my death His estate state was considerable and when he died all haste was wa made In opening It was found to contain another sealed envelope marked To be opened six weeks after atter the first envelope has been opened At the end of six weeks there was found another envelope marked To Tobo TObe TObe be bo opened in two years rears At the expiration expiration tion of ot two years ears the th will was disclosed Half Halt the estate estat went to the heir liel having the most children The other half halt was to tobe tobe tobe be invested for year Iid divided Il then among the th surviving sUf descendants sc s Bequeathed to the DevI Dev DevIt It was a Frenchman Fr with who wb directed dire t d jn lii In his will wilf that a new cooking recipe should be pasted on the outside of ot his im everyday every day A native of Finland bequeathed al l his property to the th devil With prompt prom t Intrepidity the state claimed It ft Colom Col iIi bles of Paris left a former sweetheart 1200 pounds for foz having twenty years be before before before fore refused to marry him Two years after a New Yorker provided for far a gift girt of 2000 to tor his widow If It she married 8 again P T will wU was 00 pages long The shortest on record Is that med filed In London in March 1006 It reads All to mother C T and disposes of Wills crop up In odd places Tim Mer Merrick Merrick Ier rick a miner of British Columbia chalked his will on the door of his cabin In May 1906 1900 the tte will wilt of Jules Chambord of Montreal which had been missing for years was found Inside the Jeweled buckle of a garter worn by one of his heiresses Then years ago the will of John Coffin dated March 3 1846 was fished up from the bottom of Bad Luck pond in Douglass by a sportsman It had been seen preserved Intact in a rawhide case two Inches round and teh ten long The paper bore boro the official stamp of Oliver Cromwell and bequeathed two houses near Sunderland England to Coffins daughter Mary Ma How Bow the will happened to reach the bottom of the lake Is un unknown unknown unknown known |
