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Show "Daily Utah Chronicle Monday, March 21, 2005 Wonkin' Pa Nub POLICY A 20 -somrlhirnj's jltempi* at fiidinq iru<> lovr Love on Spring Break? The Mission For college Baybeachscene students all over was heavenly. A the nation, the slight breeze words "Spring lightly tousled Break" mean bikini babes' two things: hard sun-struck hair. liquor and easy Reclined femen and wommales abounden. ed, hypnotizing Tyler Peterson So when midme with their News Editor March comes golden skin and around, sexbodacious curves (they play so crazed students flock to our continent's warm spots with coy down there in their cute the goal to get drunk and score little sunglasses). Oh yeah, the sand and water were nice too. with a stranger or two. Luckily, my friends and I had Though I am sex-crazed, I have some personal beliefs settled at a fortunate spot. that make it awkward for me Two of our 14 bikini neightofitin with the typical Spring bors got into a bit of a catfight. Break crowd. Let me explain. I won't get into all the details, I'm usually the guy question- but I was nearly panting by the ing the entertainment value of time it ended, and one of the a "donkey show," which one girls' bikini tops was waving Chico State meathead sug- in the wind on a stick in the gested I check out two years sand, a glorious emblem of ago as we relaxed in a cruise what took place there just moments ago. ship Jacuzzi. As I looked upon the aweHe's the kind of dude that would strut along the beach filled scene about 15 yards with a bottle of beer in each away, inspiration struck (that, and I rememhand and impulbered I had to sively decide to have some matepay someone to rial for this coltattoo a tribal Two of our 14 umn). band around his arm. Then, he bikini neighbors I quickly ran would bump and over to the stick got into a bit grind with scantthat held the biily clad girls at of a catfight. I kini top, plucked the bar at night it out of the sand won't get into until he found and planted it one as ready to next to my all the details, right get it on as he towel. was. He'd have a but I was The girls gigwild night, sleep gled and said, in until noon, "Hey!" in their and do the whole "don't-do-it-butthing over again. I'm-glad-thatyou-are-doingI, on the othit" voices. I felt er hand, would such a tease. make the rounds by the time it likeSeconds later, on the beach the beautiful with a water botended... blonde came tle and might, if running to reI'm feeling cratrieve what was zy enough, put some lemon juice in my hair. hers with a smile (she was When night falls, I would sit covered up for all of you who around in the hot tub with my were worried), and playfully buddies and say things like, returned to her spot in the "Those girls were hot. Too sand. bad we didn't talk to them," Though I never did apand "Those girls at Taco Bell proach her and the others for were totally checking us out. conversation, I felt that the Too bad they had to stay and bond we had forged through work until midnight." this clothes-napping experiNevertheless, I thoroughly ence was strong enough. I enjoy -Spring Break for the could return to Salt Lake City sunshine, the relaxation and satisfied with the trip. the entertainment. In fact, I've Who knows? Maybe I'll see been Spring Breaking since her next year during Spring high school. However, in all Break. I'm sure I'll recognize those years of superficial flirt- her. How could I forget? I'm ing, I have never once landed sure she'll recognize me too. a hot honey. If the stars align and we do This year, I thought, could meet again at the beach, maybe different. So I made the be this time I could get my journey to sunny Southern buddy to take my swimsuit off California with high hopes in front of her. that my love life would blostpeterson@ som like a Begonia. chronicle.utah.edu nearly panting President and Vice President Resul Ali Hasnain/John Poelman 2860 Taylor Morgan/Rob Beck 1206 Students First People Incorporated Lissy Largin Rebecca Despain Students First People Incorporated 1206 888 Vote Total: 5IM IPipiypHprs Architecture Business Education Engineering Fine Arts Health Humanities Law Medicine Mines & Earth Science Nursing Pharmacy Science Soc. and Beh. Science Social Work University tfatt Swindel Paul A. Coles Natanya Miller Aniruddha Lapalikar Catherine Spencer )an Fisher Liz Clark Joseph J. Su Bukhosi Dube Jessica Wempen Oanelle Ntelson Anisa Ramaileh Jeff Bylund Jon Hayes Whitney Watchman Scott Elder Assembly Winners David Hulsberg Architecture • B U 5 i n e S very complimentary to the Legislature...and that had an continued from pagei impact." institution to address specific Senior Vice President David campus-needs including add- Pershing said the state is still ing full-time faculty, faculty $15 million behind in funding retention, classroom improve- growth, which may lead the U ments and library enhance- to cut students or increase its ments. admittance standards. HowThe U's second-tier tuition, ever, he said the U is hopeful which was approved by the that the state will eventually administration and student allocate enrollment growth government in a Truth in Tu- money. ition meeting two weeks ago, Vice Chairperson of the is 4-4 percent for undergradu- Trustees Hope Eccles asked ates. why student enrollment has Student fees are charged to not already been cut. all regular students in conShe continued, saying the junction with the payment of Legislature is "absolutely tuition. They support various pretending" the enrollment campus programs such as stu- growth problem does not exdent activities, student center ist. operations, student computer "I think it's good to recogoperations, intercollegiate nize [the Legislature] gave us athletics and student health money, but in reality we're not programs. being funded," Eccles said. The Board of Trustees met She added that the Trustees Monday, March 14 prior to the "should not be too cautious Board of Regents meeting on about raising tuition and reFriday, March 18, to discuss quirements as much as needed the U's tuition. rather than the bare minimum" "This is a lowerfigureand to solve such problems. students have been very supPershing said they tried to portive," said U President Mi- balance the U's needs with chael Young. "They were not what students could afford. hanging off the rafters necessgehrke@ sarily, but the students were ch ronicle. u ta h.edu - People Incorporated Students First People Incorporated People Incorporated People Incorporated Students First Education Education Education Students First Students First Students First Niki Florence ""'" Will Felt JoeHui • ,4vJeff Walker Derrick Brown Engineering ' - v - \ -y Engineering ' •; Engineering Engineering Engineering Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First Andrea Goldstein Heidi Hackney Amy Bronson Fine Arts Fine Arts Fine Arts Students First Students First Students First ! ; Health^^^^! Students First Health '^^^*SS& 1 Students First , ., HealthV;;7f;j^5g: Students First Vanessa Thornton Eric Vogeler Colin Mackey 3arbara Spencer DanChipman ItaK.Muavesi . ; S Kate Wagner Jennifer Rogers Kristin Bunk GregCondie Shadie Ghaibi SeanHeadden •'• J Students First Joe Coccimiglio Business :$$:': ^ 3anielle Brown ; „ . Business S i R ^ . ' Crystal Gardner -;. Business ^ ^ ^ S . Business 3randon Preece Joe Martin , Business Emily Schachter > ^ Students Students Students Students Students Humanities Humanities Humanities Humanities Humanities First First First First First •'> ; law:-". v^^rf:?-'" Students First Weston Lloyd Students First Medicine Steve Johnson. ., '^n,;;>^MinesS Earth Science. People Incorporate^ v. Kristina Wirthlin Nursing Students First Allen Shih^' :: ^g^jr : Maryam Safaee Adam Wolfe Jordan Judkins Students First Science Science Science Students First Students First Students First Jessica E l d e r ™ 1 ' ^ - • Soc and Beh' Science Soc. and Beh. Science Kira Ayish Soc. and Beh. Science Taylor Howe Clark Cannon Soc. and Beh. Science Stephany Murguia Soc. and Beh. Science Soc. and Beh. Science Paul Wennerstrom Soc. and Beh. Science Spencer Pearson Students First' Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First Clifton Uckerman Students First Social Work Caitlin Barth^^^?? ^University TUITION Students First People Incorporated Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First Independent Students First People Incorporated Students First Students First Students First Students First People Incorporated losing a sense of who we are and what we're doing." continued from page 1 Chatterjee disagreed have found a different text for "Higher education is not a pothem," he said "Now, it's more litical bargaining case where complex. If I grant [one] ac- doing business is a goal," he commodation and there are said "When that happens, 10 different faiths in my class, we're all the losers. Neutrality I then must also accommodate is a political value, we should be going for objectivity or those nine others." For that reason, he said, he fairness. There is no room for may now be more inclined to neutrality in academia. It's an objective pursuit." deny all accommodations. However, Chatterjee Rather than battling religion, Francis said the U should warned that no belief should be doing more on the campus be taken as a target. to invite religion into the pub"But constant clashes with lic sphere of education. deeply held beliefs are side Panelist and history pro- effects," he said "What good fessor Colleen McDannell is faith if it can't withstand agreed "We have refused to critical scrutiny?" invest any capital in academMcDannell said the new ic study of religion," she said policy should coax students "We should shift our atten- to think about theology and tion toward religion." express their religious beliefs Francis agreed. He said on paper. classrooms should acknowl"Students will now have to ' edge the role religion has think, 'What are my sincerely played through held core beliefs?1" history, but in she said. "It forces some locations the them to systemUtah Constitution atize and express "There is a complicates that. their morals-StuPaul Toscano, difference between dents will have to come up with an panelist and attorney, said there the way people see established set of religious beliefs." has been a sea of change in the past teaching evolution She added that 30 years that have LDS leaders would brought religion from the way they need to recognize and morality to the complexity of the front of politisee swearing or morality. cal thought. He reShe said former ferred to that time watching sex/' LDS President as the "conservaEzra Taft Bentive revolution." Paul Toscano said. son was the only leader who ex"On a map, Utah pressed views that is the reddest of could help Chrisred states and Salt Lake City is a blue island in a tina Axson-Flynn—the thered sea," he said, adding that ater student who sued the U, the U would look like a fresh claiming the Actor Training bruise with the diversity of Program faculty tried to force her to swear. views on campus. McDannell said the church Francis agreed that the United States has become leader had warned against more religious. "If you drew vulgar or inappropriate ena line around the Northern tertainment, but added that Hemisphere, the U.S. is one the university is a place of of the most religious nations education. on Earth," he said "Religion Toscano agreed "There is is thriving here and is won- a difference between the way derfully pluralistic." people see teaching evolution He compared the U's func- from the way they see sweartion to a business, saying it ing or watching sex," he said should play a customer service "This will force leaders to role and learn the technique distinguish these things." sgehrke@chronicle.utah.edu of accommodation without Basim Motiwala . - . , • Jane Boyer Elliot Scruggs Nicole Nguyen Tucker Morgan University University University University University ELECTIONS continued from pagei rington said he thinks Hasnain and Poelman will do a "phenomenal" job. "[Poelman's] heart is totally in the right place. He's the type of leader, regardless of the title, he's going to be involved, actively trying to make a difference in students' lives," Harrington said. He also complimented Hasnain's people skills. Taylor Morgan, People Incorporated's presidential candidate, congratulated Students First's leaders. "I respect John and Ali and I'm excited for them. They've worked hard They've run a great campaign," Morgan said Hasnain also credited an endorsement that ran in the opinion section of The Daily Utah Chronicle on March 9 for his victory. "I'm sure it helped us," he said. Hasnain also said he t:r ;-'f !"' Students First Students First Students First Students First Students First People Incorporated thought People Incorporated showed sincerity and integrity, despite the endorsement's assertions that PINC members had proved themselves to be "less than completely honest." Campaign Manager for People Incorporated, Yandary Zavala, said the endorsement unfairly influenced the results of the election. "I didn't feel it was fair at all. I felt it wasn't based on anything substantial but the opinions of certain individuals. And a lot of it was untrue," she said. "I know we ran a campaign of integrity." Morgan agreed." [The endorsement] misrepresented who we are and what we've done," Morgan said. Hasnain, Poelman and Largin will take office shortly after Spring Semester ends. tpeterson@ chro nicle. u tah.edu LEARN FROM THE SCHOOL OF LIFE Get Involved! Program Director positions still available. Application due on April 1st. Drop by the Bennion Center or visit our web site to apply. You've got what it takes. Act on your values. Confront and resolve community issues. Add life experience to your re'sume'. Stop by the Bennion Center to learn more about leadership opportunities. 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