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Show IRREVERENT AND SCAN DA- LOUS- a T Our souli arc & filleted with poignant ei aoguioh to tea buoIi a treat and good 81 man is the K'. Klt. major general Dr. J, I. Nuwiuan ppekenorio ao irrevor- P eot ujurjDcr by tuub frraculortH fellows at 5 WatlcrnoQ of tho LouiHviklo Courier I: .Journal and Donn Piatt of the Wash- I innton Capita!, flioho nun of qui!) rudely attack the Kt.liov. and miliiarj t man ot'tho ohuruh, wlioso attentions to i Bouihcrn cburchcH and their incomer o in war limes should have procured t profound rc?pcot, even if tho manner J in which ho departed fiom Utah after r his eiperience in tho New Tuliemaole t did DOt awaken respect; but rockiest- c and profane men, forgo iting or ignor- ing all this, epcak of him as if ho were f an ordinary mortal, and of his appoint- c moat to tho inspectorship of connulatca a oh if it were no moro than that of & f minister to Britain, Fraoce or Germany; Ger-many; whereas ho can go where he pleases, and whether ho pleases or do, footing up a nice little ' bill of ex penscs for Undo Sam- , ucl to pay ! But ho'U bo economical! economi-cal! Wonderfu'ly economical! Whoever Who-ever flaw a gentleman of tho cloth with no honest chance that wasn'tl Tho Courier-Journal actually calla 1 hi in "Chaplain of the senate, electioneering election-eering letter-writer, partisan intriguer und traveling inspector of consulates!" Could anything be moro hcartrendingly profane, except it might be the following, follow-ing, which wo clip from the same god- i i . Tho adminialralion is making activo preparations 10 iimura tho complete wicocss of the millennium, Kev. Dr. Newman, ohaplain of tho ficnato, has been appointed to tho high offico ol iiiHpcotor ot United States consulitott throughout tho globe, iiom the ''boreal realms of tho polo" to tho furthest, habitable realms of the Antarctic ocean. Not that wo mean to convey tho idea 1 that tho senatorial chapltia is compelled compel-led to visit inolcmont latituder. That would be a cruel martyrdom to ono of his tender flush, but ho can travol wheresoever ho listeth, and by virtue of his office draw a magnificent mileage, which will cnablo him to fare like a prince Of course the inspectorship inspector-ship ot consulates is a mcro sinecure. Most of tho American consuls arc wicked men, and lavo brandy, cardB aud game-roosters, and parson Newman New-man is not to ho forced into their ungodly un-godly society unless liiey make a special request Cor his inspection aud prayers. But as tho last c9ngress was so absorbed ab-sorbed in the business of trying to grab an increased back salary, it naturally lorot to establish a millennial bureau, in order to carry out tho President's policy. Mo mutter. Newman can establish es-tablish tho millennial outposts just as well as inspector of consulates, and if Lucifer has any unfinished business to fix up. or any last words to speak to his afflicted family, before his long sojourn so-journ in a dungeon fir a thousand yearB, ho had better nurry up his work before Newman gets his oyo upon hira Touching at Saroana Bay, ho will leave a b'.'x of tructs and hymn-books hymn-books with President liacz and that dusky dignitary will soon bo Hinging the hundredth psalm with dit-teudedivoricsto dit-teudedivoricsto tho tarantulas nnd centipedes cen-tipedes of San Domingo. Consul, Li utltr didn't help on tho cause- of tho millennium millen-nium as much as he might have done had ho not preferred to get roaring drunk on tho streets of ancient Cairo sovuu days in the week; but thcro is a do n man there now, aud Parson Newman, New-man, with his prayers, will quickly BK.ko different tueu of the Turks, Arabs, dogs and consuls who infest the filthy streets of the flea-bitten and pediculous pe-diculous city of the Nile. Tho chaplain chap-lain is also on an inspection of the missing mis-sing stations in Oriental lands, a position posi-tion which makes him of great value to tho Presidential millennium. If in going down from Jerusalem to Jericho ho should fall into tho hands of the Ishmaelites, and they should oonoludc to make a sort of Credit Wobilior of him and divido his spoils, ho Will be ' reminded of the Ishmaelites at Washington, Wash-ington, Harlan, Patterson, Pomeroy and their fellows, who practice "addition, "addi-tion, division and silenco" on every bit of booty (hat full in their way; and seoing tho similitude between the Arabs of Jericho and the Arabs of Washington ho will have causa to rc-j rc-j oico that the millennium is advancing rapidly. After reading the foregoiug, ono is not surprised at anything; not oven at finding this in the Capital: Tho llev. Doctor Newman, M. E. M., ,M. C, LL. D., etc., etc., has shown symptoms for days past of an cruptioD. His lofty summit has been cloudy, and in tho depth of his bowels wcro heard heavy rumblings, to such an extent, that when he ascended the pulpit or tho platform, his littlo con grcgation in tho Lord provided themselves them-selves with umbrellas so as to bo protected pro-tected from tho expected fall of stones. Tuey were Dot disappointed. The reverend gentleman has had two violent vio-lent eruptions of tho sort called by scientific men mud volcanoes; and in both of those wo came in for a heavy share of the erupted matter. In one lecture this lofty mountain of Mcthodis-tical Mcthodis-tical piety (no pun) roared and hissed Biid thundered at the Sunday press. In ihc second he bellowed and rumbled and shot forked lightning at "the scoffer." Nw wo arc told by tho frionds of tho Kt. liev. Msjur General John P. that be meant us, "lie called us a ecolFer, SamivL-l," and wo feci bad. Indeed we may say we icA ridiculous. A scoffer I That any ono should live to call us a scoffer ! Wo have been called almost everything el so, and did Dot mind it much. Wo onco saw a handbill that said a certain political meeting would bo addressed "by senator sena-tor Swivclbangs and other gentlemen." To our att'azement we found ourself to bo "the othc.- gentlemen.'' This1 was not pleasant, but the anguish was nothing to what we now feel at being designated by an eruptive canon of the ohurcn an old smooth-bore as a eccffcr. Now, we are not a scuffur. Wo never did scoff. We would die in cold blood before wo would be caught scoffing. scoff-ing. o don't know how and we won't learn. There uow. We said poignant anguish afflicted our tender sou!?; it is worse! We arc horrified, pirilyui, petrified I To thus treat the great and good, etc I Italmoii passes belief ; and it is impossible im-possible to see how the great aLd good, etc., could bear it, were it not for the six thousand in coin and expenses paid, with which be hopes to smooth his thorny way to glory hereafter, his salary as pastor cf tho Metropolitan church and the seven thousand live hundred paid him by tho country for senatorial praying, being utterly inadequate inade-quate for the purpose. |