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Show I f 7 I'l' The Romeo-Juliet Kiss. . Hif The osculation Idving public was, .a few years ago, HiU; edified by vivid and elaborate descriptions in sen- HiT fy' sational periodicals of the Olga Nethersolo kiss. II 'f "; t Miss Nethcrsole's efforts were given such promin- H dj ence as to excite that emulation which finds its H - ijj legitimate outcome in actual example, and she f claimed powers of osculation capable of raising a if man's soul, if not his hair, to nether heavens of H 1'r'V sensuous bliss. The pictorial press broke loose with H J p half tone representations of Mademoiselle in action, H t! with lips more or less suggestive of a steam shovel H J i , attacking the side of a hill, and made all manner ; (jlj of fun-ostensibly at her expense; but at her ex-H ex-H f "n:l pense only relatively, ast he free advertising filled H 1 1, ., her theatre, and coined money for botli manager H i'll i an(l actress. Miss Nethersole claimed a patent royal 1 ,t fc on her performance, but there are no records in the j - fr United Statces patent office substantiating her claim. ij In fact she did not originate this so-called Nether-Vii' Nether-Vii' hi " sole kiss. It was but a revamping of the once cele- i ,, brated Homeo-Julie't kiss floated by Emma Abbott i'l back in the seventies. In the vernacular of the if Yi, western range, the fair yet unfair Olga vented the f brand on the Abbott steer, and substituted her ji: I own brand therefor, "contrary to the statutes herein ! made and provided." She did deceive a good many ( ' people, but not " your Uncle William." lie had It ) seen the Simon pure article in its original and I saccharine succulency years previous in the New York 1! Ace demy of Music, when Olga was a prattling child i! in very short dresses, very long pantalets, as in- i nocent as a bunch o newly mown hay, and wearing Y an unsophisticated smile that vaudville experiences H had not yet corrupted into that senseless, celluloid - stage smirk. j Emma Abbott and Frank Castle were playing Romeo and Juliet at the Academy to large audiences BH jfc . ' for Emma was nursing her boom just then as an H . if operatic favorite, and in the tricks of the trade she H ji(; 'j was already an adept. So the redoubtable Emma Erf'l- P11 un Avnnk wtls subsequently dubbed "The Abbott i.!ii', Kiss," and the amatory passages with which the Bj;' opera is plentifully sprinkled gave ample rein to, Hj.nl!'1 oscillatory ebulition. To properly describe the B t, iJHl Romeo-Juliet kiss would necessitate the use of a large B ty blackboard with an array of formidable looking H ' :'( diagrams, and a scries of bass-relief maps would B i;f also be of material assistance. However, in the P-! absence of all these, pen descriptive must suffice. ! In the pantoinime, Romeo gracefully encircles 1 i Juliet's waist if the waist is not too ample, with B ' ; 5 ; his left arm in an andante glissando movement. H j W There are occasionally prima donnas of mature H i P! years and embarrassing embonpoint whose physical M ,rP topography make embracing out of the question; and iji !J it is discouraging to an ambitious, ardent young 'Vilr Romeo of say of 75 pounds weight to attempt open- H mm ing the flood gate of glowing love upon a Juliet BB;.ll,il whose correct avoirdupois requires hay scales for. B registration. "In such cases made and provided" B1 Iff 11 it might bo best to triangulate her in sections or B'miH townships, and make love to half an acre at-a time. LiBbVH "u ieurn to the mam proposition. Following BwlI ne e arm encircno episode, Romeo draws Juliet HH: affectionately to his manly wishbone, and inclines I her head lovingly onto his shoulder. However, at H8P M"8 stage of the game it is well not to act im-HM1 im-HM1 petuously lest Juliet should lose her wig; and fur-11 fur-11 thermore, Romeo's doublet is of dark cloth, the HflHJJ pressing of Juliet's head too lovingly might leave Hi the give-away cheek paint which the galleries would H 1 j be quick to catch. Romeo then, with an ultra-jHHS' ultra-jHHS' poetical and graceful swing of the right arm, and B; with the defense of a professional aesthete, picks Hf'W UP as ifc were, Juliet's ripe, ruddy lips between the BRJil; SRsfti thumb and second finger of the right hand. The first finger might be substituted for the second, but it is not considered to be in so refined form. The scheme is to pinch Juliet's pouting lips as Psyche pinched the flowers as she bent over to sip the nectar therein a classic scene often represented in embroidery work. Then Romeo bends over, and after sundry lip sipping preliminaries, ho dips his own mustache crested obicular processes into the succulent depths of the pouting, blooming muscular flower, and holds on there like a trombone player to his wind through that passage in Rienzi where there are 23 bars of slurred whole notes in 4-4 andante an-dante time. But just here, another word of caution cau-tion is pertinent. Juliet may have false teeth, and too strong a prossure may dislodge them. The choking sure to ensure would be likely to scatter the fragments about the stage, ruthlessly fracture the poetry of the occasion, and develop a wild horse laugh from the galleries. But assuming all this serene, Romeo withdraws, legate, from Juliet's lucious facial environment, as she whispers softly, "What's a kiss anyway, without a mustache in it?" There is a gentle, sensuous and sincere "A-h-h!" from the bald heads in the orchestra chairs, and an "Uhm, yum, yum, yum," from the rubbernecks in the galleries. The oscillatory seance may be kept up as long as the morbid sensibilities of the parquet and the ribald risibilities of the galleries call for it. Then the curtain should fall dramatically, if a curtain can do such a thing, to the conventional "low lights and slow music," from th orchestra pit. Talk about cutting a watermelon; why, a watermelon isn't in it! |