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Show The Dixie Sun Mav 2, 1995 Maynord for president! Few of you may not know this (even seemed to ignore it) our own newspaper but my good friend Maynord L. Jackson uas the fourth candidate running for student body president in this year's elections. He didn't survive through the primaries, and well, after seeing his campaign issues, I just don't understand what went wrong. So, to clarify his views and positions for vou, I interviewed him. I hope you uill all see your mistake and vote for him next year. "Alright, Maynord, my first question is what will you do to improve the camfor the pus and make it more exciting students?" "Well, David, I have a variety of ideas in mind. I just hope that everyone will give me a chance to put them into action." "Such as?" "Well, first I'd like to get rid of all those golf carts the maintenance people use to run us over with. You know what they say, 'Don't bring it to school if you don't have enough to share with everybody.' Second, no more final exams at 8 o'clock in the morning. I'm going to have the rules changed so that the students decide on the hours. If the professors are unable to attend, well, that's their problem. Automatic A's all around if the teacher doesn't show up." e plans "Okay, cool. What do you have that will leave your mark on Dixie for students of the future?" "Oh, that's an easy one. First of all, I'm going to build a diagnal sidewalk between the old SU building and the LA long-rang- The Last UUord building." "But, we ahe " "Don't interrupt me! As I was saving. I'll also integrate two new college course curriculums over the course of five years. The first will be repair, and the second, golf-baretrieval. I hope that these classes, along with the new sidewalk, will make me a president who's remembered for years to come." "I'm sure they will. Anything else you have in mind for Dixie?" "Well, this deal isn't settled yet, so don't spread it around okay. But, I've been working on getting that Zeppelin guy to perform here." ll "Who?" "You know, Mr. Zeppelin ... Mr. Led Zeppelin." "Oh, right. Ahem, Maynord, my last question: What's your policy on lunch?" "I like it!" David Johnson is opinion editor of The Dixie Sun. Pape 7 |