OCR Text |
Show ssr i3 rrrr THE CITIZEN lllllllllllllllllllUlllllllIIUUIIlllllllllHlllIUaailHIIIllllllllllllNliHHIllllllllUIllllJ ftbout SSEIRVATION PLANE Pidi Jiisy fltered .. niiiiiiiii imiii,iiiiH'IIIHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIHtllMlllll,l,llllllllll'lllllllllllllllllllllllulullllllllllluluulll,lllllllllllllllllll!ltlllllltt Black Roll j)oes The Of Dishonor Pay? on tie black roll A slacker ;ed a ie Sofarj. op redatb ; ta"H tion.Sft s hold! Chid ne flaj sitna-- l nt froj editohl duty I tbel :ed, report 1 cretaiyl :ivenir J bn leneii or I of al idea! I ce, bt lorrecrl j froii I fit thir-- ) j ailing j ; j was) state r has i ires? a i I to But a is called. slacker list is like a song of the first list was lished and as the result of one of those unavoidable errors the name of a hero appeared on the list pub- - The other day 185 Kosciusko Benjamin Kaufman, street, Brooklyn, was placed on the black roll of dishonor. It transpired honor and promotion to a first sergeancy for conspicuous bravery in battle. Investigation revealed that there were two Brooklyn men of exactly the same name. Both registered for the draft on the same day and were within four months of being of the same age. They were inducted into service within four days of each other. Attempting to do the slacker what barm they could the officials of the war department stained the name of a noble warrior. And then, as was to sional medal of of the pany roll that he had been awarded a congres- - I vho a moment, of a hero on the black roll of dishonor! The war department has begun publishing its slacker lists and we hear that all of them will appear in the congressional records. What ultimate purpose they will serve we do not know. We can understand a roll of honor. There is much about it that is sacred. It is as thrilling as the re- Dead on the field of honor sponse. that the French give when the com- hate. s Ohkl i dis-hon- or But think, for M.H, al ! of depth of cowardice. ays cad expected, they tried to efface the stain with an explanation. But the be stain is indelible. There will always the uninformed who will point out be the inedal-of-hono- There goes And happen. man r say a slacker. perhaps something worse will Perhaps the man who cowered dui .. and Benjamin Kauf- when the call of came will strut about in borrowed feathers and pose, when occasion is Jy r--- ; 4 g Chriitjj ie . ghastly sight for gods like a corpse sway-in"and men, somewhat wonleisurely with the wind that But to the ders about a gibbet. an annoyance. er himself it is merely uncomfortable among It makes him to as- those he has been accustomed no depths sociate with, but it touches soul of a slacker of the soul, for in the there is no depth except perhaps the 5 thejKj ver . may be a 18 a fayorable, as the soldier whom con. gress delighted to honor. Does the black roll of dishonor pay . ..f when it costs so much? We have hot seen' the arguments for the blacklist. Presumably there are some. All of us hate a slacker. Our gorge rises when we read of the Bergdoll or of Brent Dow Allison, the rich youth of Highland Park, 111., who was released from the federal peni-tentiary a few months ago and turned up a little later in Germany. He says he is delighted to find so says a many friends in Germany, feminine relative defiantly when inHe found terviewed by reporters. that a great many people there had been watching his case with sympathetic interest, and several still write him from this country on his successful stand against the United States government. He is going to stay abroad for a long, long time and dedicate himself to relief work among the poor Germans. SOON HE WILL TOUR THE BATTLEFIELDS. Disgusting? Horrible? Aye, adjectives but weakly express the sense of repulsion we feel at such an attempt to rehabilitate the character of a craven. It makes us think that perhaps silence is better than songs of hate. Certainly the- black roll of dishonor will be a curse rather than a benefit to the country if the brave and noble are listed thereon by mistake. You cannot penetrate deeply the hide of a - slacker with shame. You can fatally wound the bright soul of a chivalrous warrior. The Stuff cCave-Ma- n And Its Myths always been sceptical about what may be, and sometimes is, But most cave-ma- n stuff. called cavepeople have preferred these man myths to the story of Adam and We have Eve. They have preferred to start mankind as an ape and bring in the Garden of Paradise only after a patient wait of a million years or so. Of course, if you start mankind as perfect specimens of beauty and intellect, such as Adam and Eve were until the serpent argued them out of it, you stuff. cannot enjoy this cave-maAnd thus it has come about that we have accepted the cave man at his n face value his face being somewhat eroded by the later glacial period. You 9 never can trust a face like that, but our scientists are the most trusting of men. Ahd they trusted in the myths woven about the Neanderthal person who lived in caves and entertained i , himself by killing wild basts with bows and arrows and then coming home to woe his fiancee with a club. Now arises Dr. Elmer S. Riggs, paleontologist and assistant curator of the field museum of natural history in Chicago, to say that the prehistoric man has been defamed as much as a politician running for office. He was a good provider and . brought home choice cuts of meat, says Dr. Riggs. Which is perfectly decorous and ethical unless Neanderthal obtained the choice cuts by carving them from his neighbor or his hated rival. The caves he inhabited have been partly filled with the long bones of animals he and his family devoured. Bones of the less choice sections are never found. We gather from this that Neander and his immediate successor, must be considered perfect gentlemen, and their wives perfect ladies, because they ate choice cuts meaning, no doubt, porterhouse steaks and Cro-Magno- n, such. The minister had criticised the newspaper for playing up the mil- 'li' lionaire divoce cases,' murders, and scandals of high and low . r ' ' tob-beri- es degree. It occurred to the newspaper managers that they could appeal to the cloyed 'appetites of their readers of having the clergymen edit the paper for Just a day. It requires many days of divorces, murders and crime to cloy the appetites of readers, and but one day of clerical editing to kill the appetite altogether and put a tombstone over it. No doubt the minister was very proud of his days achievement. ' Ho excluded the Stillman and' Stokes cases and not a single murder did he record in red headlines. Instead, he sent but the reporters to interview persons and dignitaries on the jury system. If he had been allowed another day he probably would have had interviews on magna cliarta and the recent sad death of Julius Caesar. But no, we forget. Caesar was murdered, and therefore could not appear -- . posthumously in a properly, conducted clericalized newspaper. How amazed the clerical editor would be if he were allowed to have his way with a newspaper for about a month. His subscribers would fall away so rapidly that he would be glad to go back to his small but- steadfast . Of course, Neander was not the pink He was far behind who wore carnations and played the ukelele. The idea that it was necessary for the prehistoric man to drag his wife thrice around the cave by the hair of her head before she would be tame enough to cook the evening meal is absurd. The truth is that when he brought home a tenderloin steak, she greeted him with a hug, which made him feel that he was a success in life and might soon be riding around in a of culture. limousine. This cave-ma- ed the paper for one day Just as a newspaper should be conducted if ijt is to be a perfectly successful failure. - Cro-Magno- n, - congregation. If the clergyman has a church that is tottering toward the grave, we will tell him, gratis, how to revive it. Hire Jack Dempsey and any popular sporting editor to lun it for a month. giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiNiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimiiiiiHiiiiiiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiMiiiiiiiiiiii is the excuse And he has of the modem to go back millions of years to find his excuse. But a wife beater never is clever. Anyone who argues with a n aper stuff Marsh Coal wife-beate- r. Company And Dr. Riggs tells us that the prehistoric man was far from 335 South Main club is stupid. Street stupid. Dont Go; Heres Your Hat, Reverend Sir For one day the Rev. Mr. Boyle of Denver obtained the bizarre distinction of being an editor bizarre, because of clerical ideas of what a newspaper should be and a distinction because a minister of the gospel seldom addresses himself to such great numbers. And, of course, the minister conduct- Exclusive Distributors for Peerless Coal S s 13,045 B. T. W. Tel. Was. per pound 1306-130- 7 |