Show 0 HE FELT GRATEFUL the ticket man at tho the theater had bad just opened up for business when a fellow hurried into tho the lobby and passed a cigar through the window with the remark have a emoke on me old chap this for asked the man in the box office for past favors was the reply those were excellent seats you gave me and a lady friend last night oh I 1 see yes sir he continued and I 1 really ought to make it halt half a dozen weeds considering what you did for me well im glad you liked the seats said tho the ticket man lets see I 1 place you in P F nos noa 2 and 4 no sir in R 10 and 12 in it 10 16 and 12 then then this Is s a bit of sarcasm on your part not at all sir not at all replied the other earnestly there Is a thick post between those seats you know yes yea thava why I 1 thought wb why y I 1 liked them lie he interrupted that old maid with me got sentimental after the third act and started to make me a leap year proposal but I 1 kept her dodging around tho the post until the curtain went up again and I 1 was saved here have another A D lewis in judge albert said the editor of of the the bugle to the baseball reporter 1 I see sea that rev van deusen married jud hicks to susy philbrick this morning write up a couple of lines about it fifteen minutes later the baseball reporter red faced and perspiring turned in the following A tie game was put up this a m by rev van deusen who assisted a double play philbrick to hicks the game was called at 1015 10 15 and none of 0 the decisions was disputed mr hicks batting average which has been tolerably high in the past will dou doubtless bUess bo be lowered considerably though from reliable reports the young couple expect to make a home run in tho the near future puck CHEERFUL THOUGHTS evelyn I 1 am in the blues today to day I 1 never felt so miserable myrtle why I 1 can always cheer myself up thinking what beautiful clothes I 1 could buy it I 1 only had bad the money no great curiosity over in the cairo museum remarked the man who likes to tell about his travels 1 I saw the tha ashes a of f the egyptians nothing laughed his friend as he emptied a small saucer here Is a handful of the ashes of the egyptians yes egyptian cigarettes chicago dally daily news the inquiring mind it was little dots first visit to a farm and she went with her aunt to soo see how the pigs were fed the little one gazed in astonishment at the young porkers corkers for a moment and then placing her hand on her curly hair she said reflectively aulty Aun aunty tyl I 1 yes dear deaf does koput 00 oo put all the pi biggles pig gies ggles tails balls in curl pape papers rs royal magazine HE HE WOULD BE BROKE orr mrs acker charles have you sou noticed how much change there is in this years spring suits mr acker gloomily gloom lly no agnes but I 1 know there wont be much change in my pockets when you get through THE WINNING TRICK woman lifts has but ono one trick ris that of the eyes front from birth she knows tho the power I 1 that in them thein lies she has but to look and long she needs no speech A and nd man inan will resign tho the boc boon n her eyes beseech A trick ot of tho the eyes has she cho vor for husband lover brother woman lias has but ono one trick she needs no other HANDY AND LEGGY TOO there being only ono one mirror in the tha dressing room this to 13 how tho the scrugg fam family ily of acrobats manage their toilet disappointing you could read the womanly worn ans disappointment in her moist eye and quivering lip what Is it wo we gently asked while our hearts went out to her my itly husban husbands dB present to me faltered Is it not what you expected no only what I 1 told him I 1 ex pecked of course we felt for her why we asked ourselves did such dense densa men presume to marry puck the danger sign when you see a woman with a towel around her head heating beating a carpet with a broom remarked the spring philosopher do you know what A it Is tho the sign ot of yes responded the man who had bad left lieme to escape house cleaning it means itis it is time to take to the tha tall timber unless you wish her to wield the broom against you instead ot of the carpet chicago dally daily news called reggy peggy bah jove I 1 told my tailor I 1 id A like to narry marry some rich girl and become interested in settlement work percy what did ha say reggy he said id better got get to work and make maka a settlement on that s bult I 1 bought two years ago chicago dally news 80 SILLY BILLY OF HIM 7 t 0 7 J ive just nad had my hair shampooed oed with champagne theres always so much sham about girls heads I 1 chicago journal would be needed assistant to country editor hows this obituary editor why its my own yes that haskins chap the dead shot was in here yesterday looking for adu you with a gun and I 1 thought it anything should happen you might like to correct the proofs beforehand 1 I life instinct 1 I got a terrible tur bad boldt in my headd isaacs chy dont you take some things tor for it Lo anstein absentmindedly absent m mindedly Ind edly how much vill you of git me puck something unusual rounder I 1 am afraid my liver Is getting out of order sounder what makes you think so rounder I 1 was worrying about my debts this morning in chicago f dearborn Is he following in the footsteps of his father wabash oh yes his father had ell air wives ant the son has had bad four so tar far coakers statesman |