Show HE Ants Ant's Eye Ants Eye View By B MA MAC MACHere's C Here's Heres e the latest from the US U.S. Marine Corps Corp Notice of Return Issued in solemn warning Harning This Thill Hh day of April i 1 i f o So othe the friends neighbors relatives and acquaintances of f Arthur M. M Duranto Durante US MC Park City Very soon Boon about 56 May the undersigned will again be In your rold midst t dehydrated dud lIet to take his place once again as a human being with freedom and Justice fat tot alt 1111 engaged engaged en en- aged s-aged in life Ufe liberty anil anil the somewhat belated pursuits of happiness hap- hap 1 For Fo making your 0 Joyous pre preparations pre to welcome him back Into society you must make allowances for the very crude environment which has been his hi home for the past palt 15 months In a word he might be a little Asiatic suffering from wants want's and must be handled with extreme care Show no alarm if he ho prefers to squat on his haunches instead of ot sitting on a comfortable chair if i he insists on taking his shoes off before entering the house or even if he has a tendency to bow low when meeting someone Keep cool if it he shows a liking for rice rico during during dur duro ing breakfast lunch and dinner or If U he pours gravy on his dessort dessert des des- sert sort or mixes peaches with Sea- Sea trams tram's VO De Be especially careful when arousing him from an Oriental Oriental Ori Ori- Trance a 1000 yard stare in I I a 10 foot room Be tolerant when he takes his mattress mattrell off the bed and prefers to sleep on the floor Dont Don't let it shock hock you If when answering the phone he says aay MU SHI Instead of hello and SAYONARA Instead In Inv stead of G Good I In n a relatively relatively relatively re re- re- re short time he can be taught to speak peak English again Never ask aek him why the tho boys down the street made a higher rank than he as this Is Js likely to throw him Into a violent fit tu Always avoid mentioning the word re enlist in his pr presence Above All all never ask why the neighbors neighbor's son was stationed three full years in the states aa as this can lead to many serious events some of them involving the neigh neigh- neighbors neighbor's tor's tors son eon It If you are going out for the evening and he be dresses draBes up in a eort bath of bath of-bath robe called a Kimona Kimona Kim ona dont don't laugh at him hlIn as alJ he hea hela I la Js a under the impression that this is formal attire When you are at I your favorite night club and after a few few- hours of drinking he be suddenly sud aud I denly calls calla the waitress Nal Nai san san can and asks her to pour nour his I drinks or i If U he be continually asks the manager for Hot trot Sake do 40 donot not worry about his mental state he ho is rational He lIe will wUl no doubt look for Sho Jo ge or oI on the Juke box Ithe If It he does console him him for he ISI is Ionly I only reminiscing I Forthe first few months that he ho Is II home until he becomes become house broken be especially careful careful when he Is I. In the company company com com- pany of women particularly pretty ones onu After months montha of or not seeing a pretty prett woman heIs he ho heIs Is I. apt to act strangely with witha a wicked smile on his hi face faco But Out remember his hi Intentions Intention are serious and honorable Keep in mind that beneath his tanned and rugged exterior there beats a heart of gold the only thing of value he has left Treat him with kindness and tolerance and an as occasional quart of Seer beer eer and you will be fee able to ye re ro tate state that which U le now now a hollow aheU shell of the once proud civilian you know Arthur M M. Durante P. P 8 Send S.-Send Send no more mall to cue care car of San Francisco Calif the iho women off the streets fill tIU the refrigerator with beer and get my civilian clothes oft off my relatives backs IM I'M COMING COMINO HOME DOME |