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Show September 1972 Page 13 UTAH WOMAN'S REVIEW 3) 10 WAYS TO For MURDER Healths YOUR HUSBAND Sake YOU'LL LIKE THIS ONE I cQte Spine is the Human SVitckboard -- To Your. Wfll-Dol- ng controlling DR. EUGENE L. HAWKINS 705 E. 9th SOUTH Health, aw Vigor 363-888- 1 Lecturers Available ; Is your husband an oaf and a on "Whiplash Injuries And Structural Problems boor who doesnt appreciate you or show you the tenderness and affection you deserve? Do you feel that a dozen years of enjoying his money without him would be some consolation for sacrificng the best years of your life? Then consider the following. In the United States today, if you simply let matters take their course, your husband may die seven years before you if you were both born the same years. If you're three years younger (a common age difference), you can look forward to 10 whole years of merry widowhood. But if nature's way is not quick enough for your impetuous and still youthful personality, here are 10 socially IVHIAD yis m VlOSt- -. vTHC0AT For Good Hoolth m -- - AIMS NCABT- - LUNCS fVUVtR BOWELS LIMBS Good posture, good ior you Chiropractic Walk, sit, stand tall releases important to ypyr good health HAe Pooler as well as your pos- Vitkin . . . it's ture. For preventive health care, consider chiropractic. Jack Lalanne and Wife practic, after he for accelerating the advent of blessful bereavement. They are scientifically designed to help you cut down your husband in ' -- CHIROPRACTIC --i 1. RELIEVES PAIN without dangerous drugs 2.- REST0RES HEALTH without unnecessary surgery 3.- PR0L0NGS LIFE naturally and economically Jack LaLanne, America's harbinger of health for millions, made an. methods his prime, without risking jail, Praise Chiropractic in-de- pth approved study of chiro- had already finished two years of prermed capital punishment, or even the tacit disapproval of your social circle. And the beauty of it is that you can do it all under the guise of wifely devotion and loving indulgence to your spouse. If you really love and cherish your husband, however, take the opposite course to my advice. It may postpone his departure by many years, give you a vigorous and grateful companion for the autumn years, and ensure that your children's children will have a grandfather, for which they too will thank you. hav chiropractors The medical fill. to job their doctors have theirs. And, " Jack said modestly, "I consider my"The self these doctor's helpers. "My wife, Elaine, goes to a when she has a chiropractor shoulder and her with problem lower back,1' Jack pointed out. - "I wish I'd known about chi- because ropractic in high school out when I was would back go my a cheerleader, " Elaine said. "A lot of golfers have chiropractic) doctors as do the stunt men we . know." Elaine, like Jack, said, "People don't go to the dentist to have their hair trimmed they go to .have their teeth fixed. A lot of people should go to a chiropractor and they don't know it.'.' 1. Fatten Him Up. Obesity shortens life. It increases mortality from heart disease, other circulatory diseases, diabetes, liver and kidney diseases. Obesity is particularly dangerous if your husband has any of the conditions we will show you now to promote (in rules 2 through 10), such as high blood pressure, or lung disease. Fifty extra pounds on him should, earn an extra 10 years of freedom for you. cholesterol, high 2. Keep Him Liquored Up. When he comes home in the evening, he should have a drink in his hand before he has time to take off his hat. Make the drink stiff, renew it frequently, and add to its deadliness by making il sweet (Manhattan) or sweet-and- fat (Brandy Alexander, hot buttered mm). A generous supply of snacks should be at hand whenever your temporary T&t a Certainly if you know ms blood pressure is elevated, you have a clear signal to push up his salt intake and raise his blood pressure further. If youve conscientiously adhered to rules 1 through 4, so that he's already fat, inactive, and has a high cholesterol, you may take decades off his life expectancy with rule 5. lord and master imbibes. 3. Above All, Keep Him Sitting Down. The rugged athlete you married now gets up in the morning and immediately sits down for breakfast, sits in his car, sits in his office, sits at lunch, sits in a business conference then back to the the sofa and the to home car, cocktail glasses, dinner, television, and so to bed. Your goal is to discourage any deviation from this sedentary schedule. Sitting neither rests him nor exercises him. And both would add years to his life. in is Exercise, particular, beneficial to horribly your husband's health. Regularly ridicule any suggestion that a man of his age should attempt to swim, play tennis, climb mountains, learn to ski, take up touch football, or otherwise even move a muscle. If he insists on playing golf, make him a generous, kind gift of a golf cart so he can ride from green to green. So by all means keep him sitting down. -- 6. Fill Him Up With Coffee. Very strong coffee in large amounts may work wonders with some individuals. Some preliminary evidence suggests that it may make coronaries more likely and diabetes more severe: you cant count on it, but you may at least induce insomnia. . 7. Offer Him CigaretteT. And buy him a lighter so he'll be reluctant to waste the expense by quitting. Cigarettes are the would- - be widows friend. Lung .cancer, several other respiratory ailments, and heart disease are all induced or accelerated A There is good eveidence that a diet high in saturated fat (such as meat fat, hydrogenated vegetable oils, and butter) raises the blood cholesterol. Middle aged men with a high blood cholesterol are much more likely to have a fatal coronary than those with a low cholesterol. Polyunsaturated fats found in large amounts in oil, com oil, polyunsaturated margarines, and fish may reduce cholesterol. So try to fill his diet with saturated fat; select meat heavily marbled with fat (it is tender, hell love it) and give him plenty (he'll love you). Never bake or broil when you can fry, always using butter or hydrogenated fat. 5. Get Him Used To More And More Salted Food. by cigarette smoking. 8. Keep Him Up Late. When the ground has been carefully prepared, fatigue and lack of sleep appear to accelerate the cardiovascular storm that may hasten him off the scene and you to a life of well- earned leisure and freedom. (You can always go back to bed in the morning after you have made him eat his cereal with sugar and heavy cream, buttered muffins, three fried eggs, and bacon.) 9. Dont Let Him Go On Vacation. He might exercise, relax his tensions, and escape from your cooking. 10. For Good Measure, Nag Him And Worry Him. Money and the children are sure- - fire topics. This will induce him to drink more and sleep less, will elevate his bloo.d pressure, etc. An experienced wife should know how far to 4. Feed Him Saturated Fats. safflower (ttraig goad her husband without actually driving him away (to more exercise, less fat, more deep, and a lower- - pressure mate). , Next Issue: Hair To Day, Gone To Morrow |