Show AT ab Y A THRILLING SHOT old joe was ras bilking as usual tor for the edification atlon ot of the compin campins com pins and football oot ball experiences became the pet theme them relates pearson s I 1 shill shall never forget one cue final said he e were draven one ill with irth about a minute to RO go when I 1 got the ball oft off I 1 vent passing man after nian man till I 1 not got within range and ther I 1 paused I 1 can lie he ir the aroi crowd a shout shou ing no non shoot min m in shoot draw draw ing oni on foot well nell back I 1 let hi ind and the the yell that hit vent up oll oil I 1 1 iab a of pain ell joe did you scored score cor e 7 asked on one impatient listener scored cid it tool took the missus full ten minutes to get tb bed rill rall from bet between veen my toes bright prospects A charming boung woman walked into the stationers stationery station ers shop in a village and asked to see some typewriting paper after making her selection she hesitated tor for a moment do aou ou make an reduction to clergymen 7 she inquired yes replied the stationer prompt ly are ou a clergy clergyman man a 8 N ife noo no 0 she ehe answered A daughter probably ably said the man as he tied up the pak age no was a as the 3 oung woman oman s best tating answer but 1 and she leaned over the bouner ani spoke in a con v hiser it if nothing happens I 1 shall be engaged to a theological student as eoon coon as he comes home from college next term EN er batly s magazine I 1 A SIMPLE arrangement Z hardly does you alto ever bother you about her new bonnets 7 easy basy not in the least when she wants nants one she simply gets it and has bas tha bill sent in how to regulate it think the stock exchange should be regulated 7 docker bocker yes it should be arranged tor for stocks to go up when ihen ou on buy and go down doin when A hen ou sell he meant well doctor alti wh llie don t iou settle bour our dilla lou ou said when I 1 was treating iou on that sou could never repay for for or m efforts gardup hardup 1 I meant it doctor resourceful 1 idov wait I 1 II 11 get ou on some glue with nith which to fasten his wig undertaker oh ob that s not dot feces a bar ara I 1 ve just used a couple of tacks punch hardly a success did N our daughter ha hae a a fine N aed ed din dennis dennise only fair the presents pie ii mere ere gr grand but there a m as no tight light aleace A peace seeker here are aou ou going this sum mera Nom OM herc replied ml 1111 groi Gr ocher cher hin hi n ever bod else Is pushing through the boardwalk crowds and to listen to tour four different kinds hinds of 0 music at once I 1 am going to stay home chere its nice and quiet A ashington evening star in the hospital now Bil lkins the bard stood in the 6 treet street besterda est erda malting for a thought to strike him well lid aid a thought strike him no zo but an auto did near enjoyment lou ou dont don t inow I 1 now what oft miss when 3 ou on can cant t listen to the honk of your own oin automobile 1 I S don t know about thit that I 1 TO te got a pet goose A danger it Is a ver serious thing to have measles in a jail li so very serious 7 because it ft makes tho the inmates break out much to be dreaded mrs plummer Is not what you would call a fierce old do dowager vager I 1 hope X rell ell not still I 1 bould hate like the dickens for her to look ailt t me through her resemblance impossible does onson look like oua no replied farmer corntassel and ho he nestr will no power on earth could persuade glide cinde Corn corntassel to wear vicar whiskers and old clothes evening atar i i WILLING TO compromise za rang pang by the way vay old fellow fello Nv can you on let me have two tor for a aveck wang sorry but I 1 ve only got a dollar dang bang all right let me have that tor for t two ci weeks A leader mrs Glug gins seems to be a sort salt of general leader in social matters here oh cs she Is one to whom all the other ladles ladies look first in social affairs Is her husband wealth wealtha 7 not so eo very perhaps she comes of a distinguished family ancestors probably came over on the Alay mayflower flower oh no it isn t that lou see she his bis gone to chicago six times to ie be operated on cs A A hospitals epigrammatic that xann t a bad epigram on the magistrates magistrate s part said the somewhat Nhat educated edu cited tramp who iho had been convict collet ed for vagrancy what did he ra saya ask asked e d the tramps pal seven days daub came cam 0 the reply that am ain t no epigram is it if I 1 I 1 in m ure sure it Is I 1 once asked a parson v what hat an epigram was nas and he said its a short sentence that sounds light but gives vou plenty plent to think about he hadn haan t forgotten how A man stepped on all 01 old d mr brig gins corn the other da day in a croiN crowded ded trolley cat cai and despite the fact that mr tr Bilg ni iggins gins has been a deacon in the church for twenty years cars he swore saor like a trooper nell ell when the time comes for nir mr briggins to tike like the matter up with the lord he will doubtless bo be for given on the ground that no other provocation so quickly recalls thelmab the habits of one ones a v wild lid and v wicked past A money saver thinks he s got a scheme for get ing rich eha yes he has invented pneumatic tires tor for silver coins so that a mans N wife ife cannot hear them rattle the mother tongue do vou on realize the power of the mother tongue asked the young oung man who professed interest in literature I 1 es and so does father replied tho the young woman their haunts pop whereabouts are the tha manthe hunting re about here sonny in leap veir ear As it see ns to them little llie ilie i lie westlake Is new york near the atlantic ocean oceana little dottie no the tha atlantic ocean Is near new york TOO BAD I 1 I 1 r P V 41 gus I 1 got snubbed b by that girl at the men s furnishings department I 1 asked tor for a standing collir collar coll ir and winked ad aad smiled at her and toni tom well gus and nd got a turn down don n apprehensive hamlet fatt is timorous timo roua about ap peiring in this town stage stag fright at it his age P why he be a been on art the boards for years bears but this Is the first time be wa ever billed tor for two nights nighta in ont one place at the matinee Enthus enthusiast last oli oh don dent t you on love ik good play playa modern girl yes indeed it add much to the scenic affect and c coi tume li life |