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Show On the look out for bears This is a follow-u- p to an article I wrote about bears last fall. Remember, we had bears all over the town and people were complaining because they were tearing fruit trees down and generally making everybody nervous and ex- cited. Last fall, I got to help trap and move some of the bears and put radio collars on them so that DWR could track them. Kind of like those radio bands they make criminals wear so they can keep track of them. Now that I am an award winning investigative re- and nuzzle up nose to nose with a sleeping bear. Besides, there might be snakes or spiders in there and I hate snakes and spiders. And I dont imagine that it is merely happenstance that porter, I decided that I might try to do some factual followup work. So, I followed up with DWR-Gu- y and he took me out denning bears. I know you people call other people that wont believe this, but denning are woke up from their nap a bears is climbing into the bear "grumpy bear. I bet bears deden and checking to see if its serve the association of "dont in there still sleeping. Just for be such a grumpy bear or she good measure, sometimes you is as grumpy as a bear with a grab it by the head, take the sore paw. old collar off it and put a new Yesiree, I think a person one on it. might want to think twice I dont suppose anybody ever about getting into a cave with asked, So what do I do if the a bear. Especially, a bear you bear is not hibernating but put a collar on in the merely napping, waiting until first place. I suspect a fine fat meal comes along that if elephants and grabs him by the head and never forget, a bear tries to change his collar? might also not forget DWR-Guy was out a person that trapped I thought of his mind if he thought we him, tranquilized might just crawl inside a cave him, pierced his ear, hauled him up to the mountain that he just THE SAN JUAN RECORD Wednesday, April 10, 2002 Page 5 reassured this joke about running and bears. Sometimes I carry around a joke for years waiting for the perfect time to use a trail and they ran into a bear. One guy gets in his backpack and pulls out a pair of track shoes. His friend looks at him and says, Dont be so stupid, you cant outrun a bear. The other friend looks up and says, I know that. I only have to outrun you. Middle East, and the fact that they still havent got n that dang guy, I just dont think cave dwellers like myself should be moving around from cave to cave actBin-Lade- PI Courtesy photo didn't notice that I was wearing my Cvandrnas Restaurant Kitchen wwwwwwm days a week for Breakfast Lunch Gift Shop Dinner Chicken Steaks Ribs Mexican Food Soup & Salad Bar Blanding 678-212- 2 VS 7 Open Banquet room 733 S. Main ing suspicious. My too kind and loving wife didnt seem to be overly opposed to me denning bears, at least as soon as she checked on my life insurance, then she seemed rather agreeable and All you can eat Soup & salad bar Rotating Buffet includes: Traditional Mexican Chinese Italian Regular menu also served 33 East Central 7 Monticello 1 587-301- WflGON Sykzzk vf yi . Serving The Four Comers Since 1984 Fresh Hot Homemade me to climb in the cave and check on the bear. I suppose since he is a wildlife biologist and knows of, he a thought perhaps reporter is a small price to pay for obtaining factual data about bears. He would, after all, know what to do with this data whereas I what bears are capable would merely report it. I asked, What do 1 look like... Stupid? Apparently, he thought that I do for you, just so you can have a good laugh. Last year, the drought made finding food very difficult for bears. Bears generally dont like spending so much time with people. We might have of had an lookwere bears last year that over-abundan- ce ing for food in our pantries, but Mother Nature has a way of taking care of problems in a natural way. We checked three female bears and none had cubs. Usually, on a good year they will have two cubs. So, hopefully the drought will end, the bears will stay on the mountain, and the only apples and peaches used will be in pies made for reporters risking life and limb to get you a story. As always, I love to hear at from you garytorreshotmail.com. 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Besides, I just thought your readers would like to know the stupid things PATIO Cowboy Museum Mixed Drinks litre SfrErre vailaDle Monticello Gift Shop astern straight away but assured me that things would be fine and that if he saw my legs start twitching he would be sure to pull me out real fast. 1 suggested that we draw straws and that the winner get T)Q 164 South Main A Taste of the West cause he didnt answer Youre invited to Salads Deli Sandwiches OOKHOUSE 587-329- 9 Of course, DWR-Gu- y friend wanted SAN JUAN COUNTY DINING GUIDE OLD TYMER Prime Rib DWR-Gu- y running shoes. Besides, with all the action in the Lunch Dinner wwwqouldings qcmldingsig goading; com Daily Specials Historic Loop Bluff 672-234- 1 HiftgniEflGffl 311 Vegetarian Selections Espresso be- the opportunity to demonstrate his testosterone level it. This seemed perfect. There were these two first. I dont want to admit friends who were jogging down that 1 was chicken, but to a then dumped him out in the middle of nowhere. a hibernating bear. was a rhetorical question I could go denning bears if I was stupid enough to be so inclined. So I went. I went primarily because I was dying (ha, ha, ha) to tell walked down, and An upclose encounter with that DWR-Gu- y 678-217- 7 |