| Show Ii n fl L' L Left f f t FJ Field Ie I. I Id I IBy j By Corey Bullock Managing Editor I 1 was ready I 1 had a years year's supply of nachos and drinks I 1 had the squeak in my Lazy-Boy Lazy chair fixed so that I could be comfortable I bought a satellite dish and had all of the games I 1 wanted It was the start of hoop season and I 1 was ready The problem is that I dont don't think the was ready to begin play if you youcan youcan youcan can call it that Have you ever seen a more boring event than basketball Nobody scores the defense is sloppy and the games take three days and that is just to get a parking space The ticket prices are so high it makes you sick to your stomach I think the best way to describe basketball is expensive expensive expensive sive cheap entertainment or just plain boring The slogan is I ILove ILove ILove Love this Game It should be I Slept through that Game This past Sunday two teams of often ten scored more than points Cleveland and New York scored points in wins The Utah Jazz h haven't vent scored points all season fh fhe h e closest they have come is 99 points in an opening day win against Seattle Talk about boring where is the offense The only offensive thing about the Jazz lately is when Greg Greg Foster Jeff Hornacek Howard and Antione Carr are on the floor at the same time That is an offensive line What's wrong you ask Let me metell metell metell tell you There are two big glaring things that make the bore you to tears Illegal Defense What is an illegal defense If they catch you being an illegal defender what do they do deport you to the Continental Basketball League CBA I 1 thought the object of the game was to score and to not allow the other team to score Illegal defense Teams try to hard to force their opponents into an illegal defense They do this by only playing three- three three on-three basketball The three best offensive players on the floor play against the three best defenders of the theother theother theother other team while they other four players on the floor stand around BORING Do away with the illegal defense The other reason for the boredom is their are no shooters in the The has put out a All Points Bulletin looking for shooters Help wanted sections are full of advertise advertise- ments for shooters The fans are crying crying crying cry cry- ing for shooters and the players are just crying The Jazz in their last two games against the Rockets have shot shota a poor 36 percent from the field Imagine getting 36 percent on a test or anything I would kill myself I am about to do that from the boredom of the What ever happened to the days of the Lakers where they use to sprint up and down the court playing fast break basketball Where is the Bad Boys tenacious defense That was fun to watch Even the boring half half court court offensive mind ed Celtics of the were more fun to watch At least they had some shooters I was ready for some hoop The just wasn't ready to give it to me I hope they hurry hung up and figure it out because my nachos are getting cold and Im I'm really bored bowl |
