OCR Text |
Show THE BENCH FARMER A DOLLAR AND A QUARTER'S WORTH My kids have been singing, dancing and doing some of the darndest antics you ever seen They read the article in last week's paper about $500 m prizes to be given at talent shows at the U B I C. Some of the maneuvers they go through just don't look like talent to me I'll bet when they hear there's a horseshoe pitching contest they will sure hunt the placj over for horseshoes. Hoieshoes are a lot harder to ind now than they were back when I was a kid. You could find any sized shoe, some flat plates and some with big long corks on with steel centers. Now your lucky to rake up any odds and ends. My daughter, Ann, stands in front of the mirror for Hours fixing her hair. My son, Perry, has a crew cut all he has to do with is shake his head and his hair is combed. And if mine keeps falling out, I'll have him hooked. When the price of a hair cut was raised to $1.25, darned near got out the shears and the old bowl to start doing my own barbering. But, you know, you sure g'et your money's worth at the Reynolds Barber Shop. You really get entertained while you're getting a haircut. Of all the rodeos, horse racing and calf roping you ever heard tell of a guy gets so darned excited excit-ed he can hardly ride the barber chair while he's getting sheared. I understand they are having a hard time getting a band for the U B I C that the boys and girls won't come out to band practice. Maybe if the Band Mothers would encourage their sons and daughters to come out to practice, so there will be a 1 Iband for the U B I C. They might could encourage the UBIC to make a do-iotion towards some band suits. I had a little trouble with my I corn a few years back. It got big and tall, but no ears come on the stalks. I found an old pamphlet that told about cross pollination, and I had my corn by a patch of spuds last year and the seed I saved did look a little funny. Well I got curious, cur-ious, so' I got my shove' and spaded up a stalk or so. nnd say, do you know what I found at the bottom of each corn stalk? A g'allon of corn liquor. If you get to telling tall corn stories, don't tell them to Harvey Har-vey Creech. He will tell you one a little taller about down in Oklahoma where the tall corn grows. Ann and Perry are still working work-ing on those artificial heifers to get them ready for the fair. I hope some of you other farmers have got your sons and daughters getting something ready. Because you're sure missing miss-ing some fun if you haven't. The Bench Farmer |