OCR Text |
Show 1 H I Breezy's Sneezers J IiiiuiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimiiuiiiiiiiiiiuiiiiiiiiiiM Census Taker: "How many bushels bush-els of corn did you raise last year?" Hillybilly: " Didn't bushel it we bottled it." B-S Did you hear about the three little ink drops that were crying because their mother was in the pen and they didn't know how long the sentence was going to be? B-S I know a gal so lazy, when she wanted to brush her teeth, she'd hold a tooth brush in front of her and watch a tennis match. B-S Woman, looking at greeting card rack: "Do you have a get-well card that hints that she's not as sick as she thinks she is? B-S Fairon. walking into recruiting office: "Gimme that old sales talk again. I'm getting kind of discouraged. discour-aged. B-S "Why not marry?" said the newly married man to his woman hating friend, "Then you'll have a wife to share your lot." "It sounds all right," was the reply, "but some of these shareholders share-holders blossom into directors." B-S Little Betsy, aged three, seemed to her parents to be lacking in the powers of observation normal to her age so a psychologist was called in. She was asked, "How many ears has a cat?" "Two." "Fine. And how many feet?" "Four." "Yes and how many tails?" Exasperated b y this time, Betsy asked, "My doodness, haven't you ever seen a tat?" B-S The telephone company received re-ceived a complaint from a lady about the language used by some linemen working behind her house. The superintendent sent a note to the foreman to make a complete com-plete report on the incident. This is the report: "Denny and I were splicing cable at pole 385. I was up on the pole with a bucket of melted lead. I spilled some down Denny's neck. Denny said, 'Pshaw, Axel, you must be more careful'." B-S "While I was out driving, I saw a cute gal in a Buick. I gave her the eye, and she gave ,me the eye. Then I gave her a toot, and she gave me a toot of her horn." "Then what?" "It was an eye for ,an eye, and a toot for a toot." |