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Show Kathleen Norris Says: The Unfaithful Wife rirlj Kynillculo. WNU Feuturix. i 1 The two young women have apparently hern having a pretty good time at dances, theaters, movies and night clubs with various admirers. By KATHLEEN NORRIS AN ARMY lieutenant, 37 -X years old, writes me - from Wales, where he has been stationed for a year, to ask if he should forgive his wife for admitted infidelity. The wife, Blanche, is 29; they have been married for 10 years and have one child, a girl of 6even. Blanche lives in Chicago, keeping house with another army wife, who also has a little daughter. The two young women have apparently been having a pretty good time at dances, theaters, movies, night-clubs, with various admirers. Now she writes her husband, Clark, that in this one Instance her affection for one of these men has gone too far; the man has left Chicago for the South Seas now, and has gone out of her life, but for a few weeks before he went away he and Blanche were lovers. "ne Is a married man," Clark writes me, "and Blanche swears that she never will see him again, nor write to him, that she Is ashamed of the whole affair. A week after I had her letter, which seemed to crack the actual ground under my feet, I had a note from the man's wife, informing me of the affair, and that seemed to me to take away a good deal of the honesty of my wife's admission. Letters Let-ters from a good many people bint of it, and she may have suspected that I would hear about it. "For the child's sake she asks me to forgive and forget, and I confess that that Is my inclination, for I love my wife, adore my child, and have lived all these months In the thought of returning to our happy little home again. But can a man ever trust a woman after an affair like this? Will she do it again? If anyone else had told me that my sensible, loving, lovely wife was capable of this sort of thing I would not have believed it on oath. He Erred, Too. "One other thing," the letter concludes, con-cludes, "which perhaps may influence in-fluence your decision. When we had been married about three years, when Yvonne was a tiny baby, I had an affair with a divorced woman wom-an who worked in my office. It went on for more than a year, when Blanche discovered it through the accident of my addressing her and talking to her on the telephone one day, believing it was the other woman. I ended the affair, she forgave for-gave me, and we never made further fur-ther allusion to it. Should her generosity gen-erosity then affect me now? I feel it unfair to consider a woman's offense of-fense in this matter more serious than a man's, but I do feel so. Do you?" Yes, Clark, I do. Especially in this case, where the woman knew well what she was doing. It isn't fair that rules should be different for women and for men, and in a strictly moral sense they are not. But by society they are differently regarded and differently punished, and women from the beginning of time have had to accept the situation. situ-ation. It is generally recognized that women have more self-control in matters of sex than men do, are finer in their feelings, and wise enough to know that for this sort of weakness they pay the bill. So TRUST DESTROYED The gnawing fear of so many married soldiers that their wives may be unfaithful during dur-ing the long separation has become an ugly reality for this army lieutenant. He is 37, and has been married for 10 years to Blanche, who is 29. They have a 7-year-old daughter. Blanche, icho is now living with another officer s wife, has admitted an affair with a mar-. ried man. She says she is over her foolishness now, however, and is ashing for forgiveness. While the lieutenant has had at least one fling during his married life, he regards his wife's infidelity as something more serious, lie is wondering whether he can ever return to the old status after the tear, now that his trust has been destroyed. de-stroyed. that while a wise man may easily be snared by a woman into a love-affair, love-affair, a wise woman is much better bet-ter fitted to avoid the danger. However that may be, your only course is to forgive Blanche, and wipe the matter as completely from your mind and your memory as you can. Should any of these dear friends who have turned informer in-former ever allude to it, it will be enough for you to say briefly that you understand the whole situation situ-ation and that it concerns you and Blanche alone. Wait Till You Come Home. Whether you two can make a success of a marriage in which confidence has been destroyed on both sides Is a question, but apparently ap-parently harmony was reestablished reestab-lished after your Infidelity a few years ago, and it may be restored again. At all events, it seems to me the wise thing is to wait until the war is over, or until you are home again, and then see how you both feel and how things go. You will probably find your wife once again "lovely and loving," your home and your small daughter daugh-ter everything to which a man wants to come back. Surely it is more sensible to make this attempt at a fresh start than to return embittered, embit-tered, lonely, with no place to go and no ties to resume. You will not be the only man who will have to make this sort of compromise when he comes home. In hundreds of cases there will be mistakes to forgive, stupidities to overlook. In all cases there will be a deep chasm to cross the chasm between the old orderly way of living and the new conditions, which none of us can foresee. The dreadful chasm of war, which carries car-ries our boys away from home and all the home influences, accustoms their young eyes to sights no eyes ever ought to see, hurries them into hasty marriages, hasty divorces, hasty decisions. They are going to need all that we have of courage and stability and code and love to bring them back. It is for you and Blanche to contribute to this effort, ef-fort, rather than to increase the world's burden. MM v $ I "See how you hoih feel. ..." |