Show kathleen norris says the shoe on the other foot bell syndicate features feature bloj J alv 1 1 0 two of them are fond of children and vi glad 1 1 d of the 50 30 cents an hour I 1 pay fay for baby care housecleaning house cleaning garden gardening hig and dishwashing 1 h vas bing by KATHLEEN N ORRIS NORRIS 99 A MOST as T ri ridiculous d lc ulous situa t tion ion has arisen be 1 tween my husband and me writes a young wife from portland me jer jerry y is in in an office that employs several attractive girls ever since our marriage seven years ago I 1 have taken quite serenely the fact that when I 1 telephone jerry during business hours a charming voice anav answers aers and that sometimes instead of calling mr van arden it calls jerry from time to time I 1 have come to know some of 0 these secretaries and bookkeepers liking some not liking others just a little uneasy I 1 now and then as to what my husband thought of this one or that jerry is tall tail handsome and magnetic and it human nature that the admiration of some of these girls should not affect him we women who stay at home with our children I 1 have three small children have a way of worrying about the trim smart perhaps unscrupulous women in the offices well heres here s my problem we live close to a mans man s college and some ol 01 of the boys have got into the habit of wandering over my way between eight 0 clock and one or two oc ock classes two of them brothers are fond of the children and glad of the 50 cents an hour I 1 can pay for baby care house housecleaning cleaning gardening even dishwashing they are gentlemen born lots of tun fun full of col lege gossip and delighted to escort me occasionally to some college show or lecture jerry t mind the occasional date but he gets white with fury it 0 he calls me at home and a mans voice answers the telephone ile he points out that these boys come of a good family have lots of idle time can afford to read books see shows be amusing company while he he reminds me Is shut in an office all day and comes horr home ie jaded and quiet stimulating companions he says that he would be only too glad to tool fool around the house with the babies get out into the garden experiment with special dishes ism I 1 am a ghost writer for one of the new york magazines that handles many manuscripts not ready for the print er cutting and correcting so that I 1 have a fair income of my own and can afford some help these undergraduate helpers of mine save me much time give me stimulating companionship and are sufficiently younger than I 1 am to prevent any nonsense about love affairs since my husband expects me to be unsuspicious and happy about his office relationships with younger and better dressed women Ws this letter concludes do you think it consistent in him to go into rages of jealousy because pers personable young men are assisting m me e with my work of late he has been muttering about the boys taking his place alienating his children and i all that sort of nonsense if I 1 talked i that way about the girls in his office he would think I 1 was v as an idiot should I 1 concede him this point double my housework give up amusing friendships jeopardize my job simply because he cannot see that there is a parallel in our positions sometimes it seems to me that men are the most ridiculously bously inconsistent creatures creature al alive ve on this last point my dear marthe martha I 1 emphatically agree with you there never has been any consistency sis tency in the way men regard women their charms their faults their wisdom their foolishness A man will marry a woman tor for her beautifully groomed alert SAUCE FOR THE GANDER its a poor rule that work both ways says the old adage but few men are will nig ing to allow their wives wives the same social p privileges leges they enjoy joy themselves ies men alen expect to flirt with the girls in in the office but any similar carrying on by their wives wives are viewed with alarm and stern disapproval to revise reuse another old saw w hats sauce for the gander sauce for the goose as they ey see sec it Fol folkway folkways Folk kwas ways are slow to change and the emancipation of woman is is far irom from complete A portland me ale wife writes miss aliss norris that her husband jerry is is tall handsome magnetic the girls in in his office cant help belp but admire him and nd enjoy his attentions jerry is is a good husband faithful and a good provider his wife attests but she cant help worrying about the attractions of the women who surround him she tries to take a light view view of it however and to hope for the best on the other hand she often employs college boys to do gardening housework and baby tending and the presence of these young men stirs up tip jealous rage in in her husband she sometimes goes to a lecture or school show with a college man just fust for the in intellectual tel companionship jerry cant see that this is is the counters counterpart counter coun terp art oj of his office flirta lions and that what is is all right for hin him is is also all right for his wife conspicuous beauty and then bully the poor thing into faded plainness because other men admire her ile he will hold forth before marriage u upon pon his longing for or a home and babies and a few years later rep resent himself as a martyr to the nursery and stay out every night he will grudge her a scanty allowance and wonder why she never looks smart it if he isn t telling her that he is ashamed of her dull ness he is reproving her tor for talking too much men are old fashioned Y your 0 U r husbands husband s position is basically y and completely reasonable if he is to be trusted with mth the sirens or of the office then surely you may be trusted with a couple of agreeable and helpful college boys especially on an employer and employee basis but ask nine out of ten men how they feel when a mans voice answers the home telephone and they will flush up angrily and mention the ly lynch ach law A hundred years ago there were no women in downtown business and ancl that particular danger did not exist there were no office love affairs and the only women in a mans man s day were those of his own household now the most attractive women in n the world special trained c college 0 11 e g e graduates beautifully groomed alert sexually free are on the prowl through all downtown I 1 think that with your literary work and your friendly college neighbors you have quite innocently provided yourself with a safeguard that will ull keep both you and terry jerry straight in marriage As long as this arrangement works as a help and pleasure I 1 think you might say to jerry that until he takes work in an office staffed only by men you feel justified in continuing it |