Show f 7 i ii i 1 1 Looking back over a sluggishly IDI spent spent Ute life it seems to me that I J could have brought more good to io m my tellow fellow people had I 1 decided l early manly to be a movie star r When Men I X was vel very young the hired men taught me to dance the Jig At the time Ume my hair ball was wu long and curly turly like Shirley Y and I could wink with either eye Why didn't Mother take tako mo me to eee see producer The p peach ch tree ree In our back backlI backyard backyard yard lI rd had scattered Mattered limbs limb and It was wa simple to leap from one to todi di the other ether A few well beat n chests a couple of coyote howls howl and I might have been Tan Tarzan n. n you fou Jane Janef A floppy gunny sack lack painted with leopard spots pota w would lild have covered a few short abort i I l. c Onu day the little mare drew a single buggy containing sit au of no ne to school ran away The mare maro did And If It 1 I just worked hero I would be fired for that kind kindOl kindo Of Ol o a Sentence If any anyone one had seen me standing on the shafts charts trying to untangle her leg from th the left tug they would havo said Bald Ben Den if I ever over saw flaw hIm You You- ought to see race me in a at t toga ga There are pictures to prove provo that at 19 I had my hair hall slicked down with vaseline and Three Roses Hoses and there was a devilish look In my eye Rudolf Valentino would have headed for tor the tent had I headed for Hollywood All kinds of ot parts might have been mine were I not eo so Infernally Infernally ally modest If It I could wear a wig and let the makeup make man work my face ver over I could stand on a milk tool Stool I and make love to long long- legged girls like Ava Gardner Alsol mould could be a bullfighter With a stand stand-In fighting the bulls bUna I would die beautifully b Liter L ter On a couch Surrounded by wailing walling Spanish girls weepIng weep weep- weepIng Ing Into their castanets ThrowIng ThrowIng Throw Throw- Ing rol roses I e ti Best thing I would probably b bis be beis beIs is a newspaper reporter I 1 would bust Into the managing editors editor's office w wearing a trench coat cOlit hat hatan an n back of ot pointy head drooping from lips and scream scream Stop the press r The 1 M. M E. E would look up at al me elgh elgy Jg and sk Why And AndI I 1 vJ would Uld ea Damfino Mac Iliac I |