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Show I Soon Available. I Scene Matrimonial agoucy. Manager Mana-ger and gentleman applicant. Mat. Agent You want a wife? Customer Yes, sir. Mat. Agent Blonde or brunette? Customer I am not particular. I insist on but ono thing she must bo a divorced woman. Mat. Agent Sorry, sir. I have none on hand, but If you can wait a few days I have one in preparation. Bohemian. Bo-hemian. A Matter of Conscience. A New York business man had been j detected In picking pockets. "Your course was strange and reprehensible." rep-rehensible." said the court severely. "Why did you not stick to business?" "Your honor," responded the prisoner. pris-oner. "I found that to succeed in business busi-ness would have to resort to methods meth-ods of whlrh my conscience could not approve." This Patience Not a Virtue. "A lot o' folks' patience," said Uncle Ebon, "resembles dat of de man who stays In de house an' waits foh de snow to melt, regardless of de people dat's fall in' down on his sidewalks." A Grave Offense. A Hazleton (Pa.) man swallowed tho knife with which he was eating pie and is going to die. Thus aro those upheld who cay that eating with tho knife is a grave offenso. Chicago Post |