OCR Text |
Show A tarirf with strings has its draw-hacks. draw-hacks. "Australia leads world in wool pro ducing." V. S leads the world in wool-gathering. t hio miners planning a strike for April 1 don't seem to be April fool-inc fool-inc Tho 200,000 Quarts f champagne drunk in Paris Christmas didn't come up to our shambooze. Tho line of least resistance is the green-goods line. Value of the U S capitol is only $26,000,000 and more money has been spent on it than on any other piece of ground. Prince Leopold, the Belgian heir, is reported engaged, but you must whittle whit-tle your own wheeze about Belgian hures. Light heads never shine. Any man who wants but little here below has It above his ears. St. Louis thieves who Btole a minister min-ister silverware must have enjoyed his service Th- early bird catches cold Style hint. Divorce suits should be kepi dark China's cabinet is resigned, but China Chi-na lsn t "Spring skirts will be six Inches from tho knoe." say fashion hints And everybody wonders. Up or ddwn? Most relatives are distant relatives when you are broke. Fsi ti .lungs on earth must be clues, they are rarely run down These talking movies won't bo popular pop-ular because thoy drown out the audi ence. Aren't as many underfed and overworked over-worked as overfed aud underworked. Germany is proving that war never pays. National league parks are building exits for "umps" only. They will abol Sb the lively pop bottle next Looks like you can't keep a good subtnerine down. Some women think the only way to keep is a husband Is In hot water, A corn In the hand is worth two on the foot. It Is easy to find fault because no body wants it. Many a man looks run down because of the bills his wife ruus up. Lots of society buds become bloom ing wall flowers. Some girls think they have got to be fast to catch a husband. When we speak of the good old day- we otten mean the bad ones. Let's hope these foreign aviation programs don't mean they will slip homething over on us. It never does for a sweet and stni !ple girl to forget the sweet part The cobbler with three daughter. I who Inherited $10,000,000. sa 6 he will paint his house firsL It must need painting worse than the daughters. Household hint: Pay your renL The egg Is easier to get than the nogg.. Somebody- ought to get up an exer else for reducing fat heads. The actress, suing for $20,000 on a broken finger, must have used it to twist men around. Beauty hint: Carry a handkr chief when you have a winter cold. That still small vole Is the voice of the people. One fellow who isn't cutting much ice now Is the Iceman. |