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Show ii Swan Spends A Night In Kansas f. By O. A. Kennedy- fc 4W Swan Swanson always insisted that V, although lie was a sbi i ph r l r, he . )iad no unreasonahle prejudice against cattlemen, In proof of this d( Irabh mk mental attitude ho ofir-n referred to I! m t iho fact that he had been i coWbo 1 '" Oklahojnn for ni n Then B he would give a circumstantial ac- vB count of one of his experiences in HH about the following language. H "Ule Rufe Chaplin store at the H crossing of the Ctinaron was always a great r:illing point for the hoys of the Cherokee strip, being cen- B trails- located a for wagon roads arid HB about as far east as the cavalry allow- fflHj ed us to range HH "A little bit to the cast of Rufc's H place you conic to the old iklohomy H I line. That was in the days of the H "boomers" and oVer there you were In constant danger of meeting up with I I stray dctachini nts of nigger cavalry K beg pardon colored troops under B9 command of thick-skulled and perfect- Bfl ly unreasonable nig colored sergeants WM looking for "sooners" which is about the most humiliating expert nee that tI can happen to high spirited Texas iffl gentleman in the cattle business, graz- jfl Ing On Injun land under special per-J "So us bnya dechled In favor of, yM Caidwn i ; . . 1 1 1 ni 1 1 1 1 . i - c.i j We J! had to go to town some place for most dM of us had not had i taste of cltj lift mPJ for a year or more. Besides Caddo ike Br9 said that there was a revenue officer BdV at Arkansas City that had a grudge agin him. and then, too, the foreman k, of C bar A, was go.ng up to Caldwell traveling with a chuck wagon and there was a chance for good epmpany "Posthole Jack held out for Arkan-tfl Arkan-tfl sas City for u long lime, but finally EBB give in and that's the way Caldwi II EXl como to get the benefit of our trade. BBJ Wc went a skally-hootln', it was In the good ole summer lime. The o bar BfcH A outfit had four horses hitched on and was loaded light W e kept a mile P3J or two ahead, shooting at prairie dogt. Icnasing coyotes, doing stunts at ropim: and telling stories Tnat night Wl camped at Skeleton ran- h. N'ext ua we took a late dinner at the Stage Kta- j tion at Pond Creek aid feeling pretty iPJ fresh, we left the wagon and rode U ahead into Caldwell, arriving in time PBJ for supper at the Covington House jftS We was now In town First, we yl9 stops at Lige Ilogan's place on main tan street, which was before the days o( IHB drug stores in Kansas, and had a IQIJ round of cooling drinks 0:1 Cade Ike gB who had lost a bet on- the time we flflj should arrive. Next Shorty sets em B2 up and then we take.-; the ponies over BbH t the livery stable. BJB? "By this time it was dark and the BflB waiters at the Covington House was wm kinder uppish, serving so many sup- BBBY J pers, but we all had mone and tips ijflj . them liberal and then Lack to Ilogan's ii- again. There we takes a round on l-v-v" Posthole and then somebody else H comes across. After which we n ill a BM In back and puts in half an hour Wl w lulling some railroad section hands, Vjm playing cards with nlckles and dimes ' , J on 1 he ' ibl BJ "But it's hot and stuffy back there so Shorty says finally 'Well boys Cald- iwell ain't what It used to be. I,et's sec jlf we -can't stir up some excitement And that was how the trouble started I "We goes back front and begins pestering the barkeeper to set em up. I which he hates awful lo do, saying that It Is charged to him if he gives anv away, so Cade tloes the handsome again and (hen Shorty asks the bar-keep bar-keep if h i heard the Cheyenne WOr whoop. II" haint sure that he has so Shorty is accommodating enough to give him an imitation. ' That ma!i(i him dry again and wc .take some more. Then he offers to show the harkecji vhat is an Apache-,war Apache-,war whoop. And then he goes on giving giv-ing all kinds of Indian rlls. Kiowa. CommanchC, Apache and Caddo first a yell and then a dose of eyewater all around, then another yell and so on. "Well, since we was drinking with Shorty, we thought it only a friendly act to veil with him too. so we made som" noise which brings Hogan down stairs. The fellers In the back room comes in and stands In the door and grins, and a lot of people comes In off the street to stand around the wall and look on. The barkcep wants to shut us off, but llo;,aii sees lots of good money coming over the bar so he says to let it go as she looks "Then Caddo and Posthole gels Into an argument about what is the proper Apache yell. And everj time one of them opened his mouth to give the yell, we all veiled so he couldn't hear himself, think, which makes both of them slightly hostile. Hogan sees that they was on the peck and begins sell-1 ing em water bit it Is too late Just about thai time a big. re l f.ice,; nian pokes hi had In at tin-door tin-door and says, 'Hyar! llvar' Stop t)nj racket " "All '.he local sports quiets down but Caddo sees his chance and gives has j Idea of the Apache war whoop and I Posthole asks the red faced man, suvs1 he, W ho in Pueblo are jou?' with that the big man comes clear in the middle of th- floor and savs i : Very solemn, "I am the Chief of Po- ' lice of the cltj of Caldwell' . "Thn hefore the rest of us know what to say Caddo has the big chief ' cornered with two revolvers, one of his own and one he yanks out of Shorty's holster. Tip- hlef puts up both hands and begins calling Caddo all kinds of drunken fools. "But Caddo holds the guns on him Stead) enough and says You used to be a revenue officer over ;( t Arkansaw.' ; "The big, 'man stares at Caddo and turns pale and yellow around the gills and Caddo says, 'You got something coming to you,' ho says. , "He tells Posthole to search him, which he does and lifts a fanc, ivory handled six shooter from his hip ; pocket. He breaks the gun in two and draws six cartridges which he divides among the bum h. on apiece, as souv-eneers souv-eneers of the trip. Then he throws the gun in the slop bucket behind the bfl r j "The big man begins lo snort more and tell Caddo he will regret his rash conduct which causes Posthole to com- jmence shooting holes in the floor, aiming Just about two Inches ahead of the big man's toes I The chief has both hands over his I head and is so fat he can't see his I own toes very convenient, so he takes .no chances but every time Posthole shools. he jump;! stiff-legged hack and jup about a foot and a half. "Ever pee a fat man with his hands lip trying to avoid having his toe n ills shot off'.' It's plumb rediculous. We tike to died a laffln. Then ffogan lakes a hand. Look here' he says, 'I'm a deputy sheriff of ! tli is county and 1 don't stand for no such doin's n my place." He starts to reach under the bar but two of the other boys has him covered quicker 'an scat and he thinks better of it. We have him come out front and line up with tie- iat man hut he refuses re-fuses to dance till Posthole shoots off one of his boot heels and then he tries to hold up both hind legs at once. Ills act was most as amuslh' as the chief of police's r ' The barkcep tries to use moral suasion sua-sion Me savs, That haint hardly right boys. 1-un is fun, but ' Uight away Caddo turns a gun on him and aays, If you don't like this show come and see how much better you can do.' oh, the excitement was becoming Intense, all right, and all six of us was handling guns by ihis time "There wasn't room in the saloon for all the performers to dance so we marched em out front and lined cm up In the street under a lamp. Then Shorty done some fane- shooting and them fellers danced a trlette or whatever what-ever you would call it and the CTOWd just roared. "But it is easier to start a thing like that than it is to finish, and We finally fin-ally had to turn them loose telling them to march straight up main street and not to look back, but to keep a gom which they done. "When they was out of sight we all goes back Inside and Shorty gets behind be-hind the bar and serves drinks free to all the riowil 'till t K,. I... I comes In through the back door and says; I don't wish you fellers any bad luck, but the sheriff is getting up a posse to take you in. Youd'd better be gftltin' across Into the territory.' 'florae of the crowd thinks tins is just a scheme to scare us away from the keg:, and bottles, but Shortv scratches his head, I dunno," ha savs, but what the gent Is right. Anyhow, I think we'd better get back to the livery stable where our horses and Winchesters i.' ' And we hustled and runs nearlv all the way to the barn win. r-- the p..n. ics look surprised to See us b.u-k so early. W saddles up in a hurrv, vou bet, and paid for the horse's feed We ; looks at our guns again and rides out On the street . "Uptown you can see bunches of j men standing out in the street vvateh-lng: vvateh-lng: so we turn our horses south towards to-wards the bridge but Just before we gets to It a man steps out in the road and says. 'Halt! 1 command vou to surrender In the name of the people of Ka 1183 5.' 'We don't do it. With Shorty In tne lead, vvi d.eic,. suie-.isc 0,,t n( the 1 .mphght, go through a front gate I across a lawn, around a house and out the back gate Into an allev, taking iwlrh us a whole back yards full of clothes lines. From the alley wo come out on a side street away from the lamps and we find it is. a might) dark night. We are In the residence part of town and find our way along hv the lights in the houses. Wc can hear men yelling to one another and horses galloping down town but wc keep following Shorty up one street and down another 'till we fitch up gainst a barb wire fence. Shorty has wire cutlors In hi3 pocket so the fence don't stop us very long and we ride across a field. In about a quarter of a mile we runs pumb against a small ha- stack and Shortv halts and calls a council of war. " T figure' he says, 'that we are about a mile out of Caldwell but I can't tell In what direction.' "Someone says to guide by the north star and go straight south, but Shortv says 'How are we going to get across that creek and not get stuck In the quick sands'" Then he thinks we are Just about as safe one place as another and we decide to stay where we arc till It gets daylight. "Just then we hear a bunch of men riding fast along a road not far away and talking and we decide to keep pretty ijuiet. "We select one man to stand guard over the horses- and the rest lie down behind the stack and go right to sleep, being tired from riding all day. ' About midnight we hears a yell that brings us all up standing. And then we see that the whole country is light as day, because the haystack Is afire and burning to beat the band "The chump on guard, being lonesome, lone-some, had rolled a cigarette and throwed the match down loo close to the haystack. hen ho found the stack was on fire he tried to put it out himself and didn't bother us until un-til It was too late. 'That's the great curse of the clg-ar clg-ar tte habit. It takes so many matches Its plumb dangerous. ' Well, we left in a hurry going due northwest. Shorty in the lead, euttinu barb wire fenres right and left Win m we looked back we soe more than a dozen men riding around that stack So we keep agoing "In about an hour we crossed a rail- road nid come onto a wagon road running run-ning due west and we let the horses go their own -gait- Wc must have rode two hours, when we lost, the road and como to a little creek It was lighter now and we followed the crek down to a board fence and another hay stack. "We let the horse? drink and then lead them to the stack while we act down to rest and wait for dav light. Pretty soon a rooster crowed and then more roosteis :ill around us and Caddo, Cad-do, prowling around, reported that we were In a farmer's barnyard. "Caddo scared. some -hb kens out of 1 tree and the hens began to squavk Right away we hears a window sash ptil up and .-i man's-Jirolce s.iv. "Who is It out there?' "We sit perfectly dnmfoundered and then vve all poke Shortv and sa, 'say something to him.' ' But Shorty can't think of anything and prettv soon the voice says. You better be' glttln' out of there before I fill vou with bird shot ' Then Shorty finds his tongue. He ftands up and savs. Hello, the house. ' The man sas. Hello yourself. Wats up ?' Then Shortv doesn't do a thing but tell the truth which shows that lie is a deep one. He says. I've lost ml wa,' he savs 'How far la it to Caldwell" Cald-well" A I. out nine miles' says the man. 'Are vou alone, stranger?" ' No.' Bays Shorty. 'I got a horse. " 'Then you better stay for breakfast.' break-fast.' says the man. "We ail nudged Shorty ncaln tai of breakfast Interested us but Shortv was firm. ''I'm sorry stranger, but as soon n I get s mv bearing, I got to be movln' on.' " 'How far is It to the strip?" says Shorty. " About five miles. " 'better stay and take breakfast I 11 liKht. a lantern and come out and show vou where to stable your horse." " No thank you,' says Shorty.' I must be going." Just then Caddo comes back and says he has found the front gate and in two minutes we are out 11 ml away pointing south across cornfields and stubbleflelds where fences seem to be unknown. Wo look back and see the farmer with a lantern In one hand and a shot gun in th- oth-r poking mound the chicken ard. Them grangers are a queer lot . "I'retty soon It gets daylight and vve finds a road and jogs along lively ' We all take a smoke and the ponies feast on green corn, which most of them had never seen before, and when It is broad daylight, wo come suddenly sud-denly out on the prairie. Wo had' crossed the state line. "As far as you could see east or Wesl vv.-i-; cornfields on the north side of the line, and on the south as far as vou qould see was tho open prairie, without 1 fence or a house, clear: through to Texiis. "Posthole in the lead reined in and, says, 'We arc over the jlhs now. The sheriff, can't follow us I move that we give the ponies a rest and a chance lo feed.' But the C S. marshals can follow US,' says Shortv. 'How about thai, rev-nue rev-nue business, Caddo?" 'Caddo turns red and then says. 'That's all off. I served two months for that and paid a finii.' "So we feel easier. And then wc discover a covered wagon about a quarter of a mile away In a corn field. ! ' That' sas Caddo. "Is our last .chance to eat a meal in Kansas.' ' So we ride back and when we get j ciose we sco a tall lank hairy, weel .leaning against a wagon wheel with 1 his legs crossed. ' " 'Arkansaw man.' sav s Caddo to the I rest of us Renter from Arkansaw Hello stringer 1 "'Howd.N.' says the Arkansaw man and nevi r moved. He didn't even un-i un-i twist his legs " 'What's the show for grub around :here?" says Caddo. " 'Putty slim," Fays Arkansaw. " 1 see you have some chickens I We will be glad to buy one,' says Caddo. " "The are not for sale, says thc-granger. thc-granger. " 'Well, couldn't you get us a bite of something to eat? We will be glad to paj you,' says Shorty, j " 'I haint runnin' no hotel for cattlemen,' cattle-men,' the man says, showing that he had an old grouch of some kind 1 'With that Caddo reaches down and I grabs the Winchester from under his knee and clicks back the hammer. I Txioky here, you corn cracker." savs Caddo 1 haint accustomed to Bpcakln' twice to anj man on the grub question. I've fed dozens of jour kind and you're going to feed us. Get a hump "ii . 1 1 1 n-l f and serve breakfast for six gentlemen 1 "The Arkansaw man untied his legs nnd took his hands out of his pockets and straightened up. I " I beg you alls pawdon ' he nays I had ortcr explained in the fust place that mv wife Is too sick to do any i ookln'. She is quite po'ly this mornin.' SVhv didn't you say so In the first place ' demanded Caddo, 'We are not aslcln' sick women -to cook for us. We can do our own cookin.' How much for that chicken?' and he pointed out a fat hen. 'I have no chickens for sale, Mister,' he says again quite earn. "Just then a white faced, scared lookln' woman puts her head out from under the wagon cover and sajs, "Oh. Jeff do let them have a chicken Don't pay ani attention to him. gentleman. He always feeln orncr early In the mornln.' I m not jio sick but what I can fry a chicken for vou alls." "Aw, lei m ride on into Cajdwell, Reeny.' says the Arkansaw man. They'll get a good appetle by that timo ' - ""Don't mind him. boys' pleaded the woman Just as soon as 1 m dySSS-ed dySSS-ed Ml git a fire started. Vou alls take you critters up to the well yonder and water 'em and give 'em a feed of green cawn and your breakfast will soon be ready.' ''(ddo took off his hat nnd so did the rest of us "That's Renslbh- talk 111 1111 he 1 s and w e will pas v on well.' Wo rode up a little slope to the east about ISO yards to where we see a well and dismounted and loosened the saddle cinches und Shortv and Cuddo manned the windless. Posthole was Just reaching for the first bucket of water, when pue of the boys veiled, Look out. everybody!" We looks hack down the hill and there v. as that eorncrackcr coming out from behind the wagon with a rifle In his hand- fWoUld DBlleVC I' 1 He began pumping lead at the bunch of us. "He was in no hurrv He took careful care-ful aim and the slu;; came sizzling along clipping off blades of cornstalks and plowing up the dirst right at Caddo's Cad-do's feet. "The boys let that bucket of water go Lack down the well and wo all jumped for our horses. The bullets kept a coming folhrln' right along the corn rows. We didn't stop to return his fire. We all recognized that It's useless to argue with that kind of a man. Hut v e broke the international record for mounting In hot haste Wc-did Wc-did not stop to tighten the cinches. The ponies would not have stood for. it. They were in as big a hurry as we were. The way wo got out of Kansas was a caution. We flew and every ten seconds come one of tfiejm slugs sing-, ing over our heads or klcJklng up dirt under the ponies' feet. We knocked down 8 half acre of green corn getting out of Kansas. 'The Arkansaw man was not an extra ex-tra fine shot but his intentions were good He kept taking pot shots at us when WC were a mile away and all scattered out and riding quartering to disturb his aim. We could hear them shots sing "At last he nult shooting and we boys were mad enough lo want to go bunched together again. Some of us, boys were mad enough to want to go back and lynch the granger, but Shor- ty say6, "No, I've had enough,' he says.j Kansas is no pi u for me, I'm plumb, disgusted with the whole outfit. Thev are all the time bragging about being; such a moral, law-abiding bunch and look at the way the have acted all night. I'm going home and never set1 foot in the state again. They've lost j my trade by their oUssedness.' "The sun was Just rising He pointed point-ed to it. 'Think what we have been through since we crossed the Un night at sun-down Think what we have had to put up with. Hereafter I'll do my trading In Texas, it s not over fifty miles further anyway.' an 1 he turned his horse'- head to the south We followed without a word. Our j heats were sore and too full for ul- f tcrancc. . "Two days later wc come limping I I up to Hed Fork store. Ole Rufe Chap- j In comes out on the platform and looks ! at us over his specs. The Darlington Stage had Just gone down and he had ia paper In his hands. H Well, you are a pretty looking , outfit,' he Bays. T Just been reading . about you in the Wichita papers. It I was a :n"ii thing you got out of tho state of Kansas when you did. The- governor was talking of calling out -H the mllltla.' I " 'Don't talk to me about Kansas-.' says Shorty It's a disgrace to tho union. Open up some canned fruit. I won't you. Chape, right away?'" on |