Show I Characters The barber who asks patrons if they w want mt their locks clipped with or without conversation Salesmen Salesmen Sales ales always ays elegantly elegantly ele ele- m men men n in hoity shops g gantly attired Without spats they would feel naked The creamy- creamy voiced barker at a penny arcade a arcade a well-known well Shakespearian th thespian a decade ago until he discovered that shilling provided a steadier in- in in in- come at electric shoeshine shoeshine shoeshine shoe- shoe shine parlors conversing in jive lingo which baffles people who can understand only English Pretty bobby lug lugging ing lunch boxes to the Paramount so so they can survive sitting through a i half-dozen half shows worshipping King Sinatra Jitterbug eyed almond-eyed I youngsters in Chinatown complete Chinatown complete completely ly Americanized An old artist copying masterpieces in the Museum Museum Mu Mu- seum scum of Art His hands are shaky so he steadies s his brush by gripping it with both hands The handicap however doesn't seem to affect his excellent canvases Crowds fasCinated fascinated fas- fas hv by pigeons nibbling at b bread d dru ru bs Proving again that almost anything can attract a mob i I in the Big Burg Germans in Yorkville saloons sipping their beer These spots used to be Bund hangouts hang hang- outs Now big signs urge customers not to discuss the war or politics The dramatic contrast in tawdry Entertainers consist consist consist con con- I of a mixture of has-beens has and youngsters with a bright future I Celeb fanatics ogling first entering the theatre theatre getting getting more of a thrill by staring at than first get from the shows The silly brawl between two friends at a midtown bar because bar because each insisted on paying the check The year old gent who has the same breakfast every morning at a Madison and street eatery J Doughnuts covered with wun mus mustard U. al-U. Ugh He claims that combination has added years to his life Sidewalk Sidewalk Sidewalk Side Side- walk Napoleons who used to discuss military tactics remaining in tune with the times Now the they also debate def de- de I de-I f bate postwar problems Swishes r who congregate for some unknown reason in foreign language movie temples The lovely hostesses Most of them look as if li lithey they had to pass a screen test before before before be be- fore they were hired Newspaperman Stuff to 1 Ogden Nash was once taken to task for using the word in one of his verses Have you you ever heard of anything being full of coy asked a critic No Nash But neither did I ever hear of anyone being full of bash The word controversy serves as censors' censors abracadabra They mutter that something is sial and they presto presto they presume the truth will vanish pen Blue-pen- have used that alibi to hinder hinder hinder hin hin- der freedom of speech and press for a long time All of which leads into an Alec yarn that illustrates our viewpoint on the subject When Alec was broadcasting broadcasting broadcasting broad broad- casting his sponsor pounced on him with the squeak that he must refrain from using controversial ma ma- promptly de demanded e- e that the sponsor explain what he meant by controversial material The sponsors sponsor's reply was a dilly He deplored Alecs Alec's caustic references references references refer refer- to Hitler and Mussolini Mussolini for for fear it would antagonize people in inthe inthe inthe the country who supported them From new book Nods and Becks Of course there are many who say that a daily columnist which means a person who has six I or seven full columns a week in a a. a paper doesn't really work but that he would like other laborers to work six days a week for the period of the so-called so so-called so properly j emergency We Ve know not what course others may take but we never never never nev nev- er have been able to do it under a seven-day seven week and some nights Often we dream of Jeanie with the unfilled column We dream that we have three minutes in which to write a column have it set read proof and make it up It would be pleasant to work five hour eight-hour days a week To quit in the middle middle middle mid mid- dle of a syllable if need be when the whistle blew And then some some days as if m mere re writing weren't enough trouble there is a lot of clipping clipping clipping clip clip- ping and pasti pasting to do It sounds easy but it takes longer to find the shears and the paste for first-class first stuff than it does to write third third all all allright right we wont won't argue fourth class fourth class stuff The Society Set which claims to tobe tobe tobe be sophisticated but is the easiest pushover for all types of phonies have gushed over fake dukes counts and other spurious nobles for years No matter how many are exposed there are always other phonies to take their place t The dowager who lost her fortune z a afew afew few years ago However she still stil lives in luxury because she became a n bookie Her clients are Park Ave Ave- Music lovers who take symphony scores to Carnegie Haland Hall Hal Halland Halland and read the tho music while played |