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Show , 1 y Ruminatin M Roundabout In which Iiuminator proposes to dream a lot, think as little as necessary, scatter a few bou-' bou-' quets while their objectives are still above the sod to enjoy them, and fire a hot-shot now and then before said Ruminator gets too old and his sight gets too poor to see the sparks fly. Woman's philosophy: If the shoe fits, get the next size smaller. A story is being told on a woman wo-man who is doing relief case work in a middle west county that shows how their education is being broadened broad-ened in the work. She visited a farmer's home and inquired about feed for his cattle. He said he had plenty. "How about clothing for the family," she inquired. "We have clothing," he replied, "but we need som shorts for the hogs." "Quit your kidding me," replied the case worker, "hogs don't wear shorts." "Hello! Is this the city bridge department?" "Yes! What can we do for you!" "How many points do you get for a little slam contract, doubled and re-doubled, and vulnerable?" Customers of Manager Glen E. Stonehocker of the Why-Not Service Ser-vice station who may get a detailed detail-ed list of baby apparel items, or baby remedies, or somethin', instead in-stead of a statement of account, must merely overlook the matter. It's no small matter in Glen's life to become eligible to the term of papa and he should be forgiven for almost everything. He says the cigars are on " tap at the station and to "come up some time." Hope he's not. foolin' us! Most newspaper men shrink from the task of writing up a wedding wed-ding and prefer to pass that responsible re-sponsible duty to the female society so-ciety editor. Yet there are exceptions. ex-ceptions. Occasionally an editor is found who can paint a word picture of nuptial events that any lady reporter might envy. There is one like this who appears ap-pears to be hiding his great talents in an obscure Kansas town, while he ought to be holding down a big city job.- Here is a sample of his 1 literary ability, which proves our point: "It was a wonderful wedding. The girl was as sweet as any girl who ever lived; but modern. As she walked up the aisle on her father's arm, her lips gently tilted at the corners with a happy smile, she was a picture of modest beauty. Her filmy wedding gown and gossamer veil floated around her fair blond head like a halo. She was as nearly an angel as girls get to be in this world. At the altar, as she passed from her father, the man she always loved, to the other man to whom she would devote the rest of her life, her dainty slipper touched a potted lily resting on the floor and turned it over. Smiling again, she turned to the dear old pastor waiting at the chancel and said: "That was a hell of a place to put a lily." A "Sock" Dolager A few weeks ago a young man bought a pair of socks containing a note saying, the writer was an employe of the Kenosha, Wisconsin Wiscon-sin knitting works and wanted a husband. She gave her name and requested the buyer, if not a married mar-ried man, to write with a view of matrimony. The young man who got the note, considered the matter mat-ter in all its phases then decided to write the girl. He did. Awaiting Await-ing the answer with anxiety, he was at last rewarded with a cute little letter stating the girl was now the mother of two children and had been married four years, and the letter had been written ever so long ago. It was a "sock" dolager, and the young man hunted for the solution. He found it. The merchant from whom he had bought the socks doesn't advertise. |